I sat at my parents table and heard my mother and father speak;a bit shocking but trying to understand it was interesting. My mother sat with what she called a cup of tea and my dad sat feeding treats to the dogs. My mother chatted about my youngest brother the things that had happened to him; the world out to get him. He has never had to be responsible for any of his actions. My mother for some reason believes he is still a child, and in a lot of ways he is very child like.
My mother is the type of woman who was never diagnosed with a mental illness; but should have been. She was an only girl of four children, until my grandmother had a round of second children all girls.
As we sat there I listened to my dad tell me how spoiled I was as a child; "in fact you all were" he said. I took the time to say "well thanks dad I feel very blessed that you spoiled us." In fact we were beaten so bad that not one of us have gone on without having issues or seeking help.
MY oldest brother Alcoholic and drug user. I am not sure if he remembers or not to be honest. He also says to just let it go. My other brother strong man,loved by all; his hands shake so bad; you would swear he has a disease. He remembers but his faith has made him a strong person and helped him to overcome the horrid things he went through. My baby brother extremely messed up, fifty still needs mommy. He has memories none of us remember. He takes no accountability and has been even arrested ; and off course never his fault. Myself wow the spoiled little girl. I carry scars as well; physical and mental. My relationships have all been codependent. My mental health in question, It's been a long time to come to recover from the damages done.
I'm so happy you are here @owlwings, and may this place be one of healing. Keep writing...get it alllllll out <3 <3 <3 Love you so much, and I am here with you every step of the way. <3
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