Before I convince you, let me be clear. I still roll my eyes when I overhear a Karen compilation. I still wish a cracka would. And I will forever fantasize about being a Capitol Police Officer on 1/6 (Now, I wouldn’t have killed anybody, but there definitely would have been blood.) Also, you ARE NOT responsible for helping anybody become a healthy, well-adjusted member of society unless they’re your child. That goes for parents, romantic partners, friends, acquaintances, colleagues, etc. If their brokenness is breaking you, GET RID OF THEM UNTIL THEY FIX THEIR SHIT.
Now, for storytime (if you get to the end of this, Namaste).
I just recently finished taking an American History to 1865 class. I took the class because history is my favorite subject. I was particularly interested in BCE and how the country moved through colonization to become the United States of America. I also had my bullshit bias magnifying glass at the ready just in case I needed to send a strongly worded letter to the authors.
I read every section in its entirety and did additional research on areas I found interesting. When I got to the section entitled, A Nation Divided: 1800–1877, I stopped reading. Since I’m well aware of what went down during THAT period, I found myself lightly skimming the chapters only if I needed the answer to a test question. Despite my attempts to limit my exposure to the information, I found myself feeling sad, angry, and a little depressed.
I’m familiar with epigenetics and, in the past, have researched working with my ancestors to heal myself and my bloodline. But this last round of difficult feelings led me to seek out professional ancestral lineage healing services. In my research, I came across something that hadn’t occurred to me before, White people having ancestral trauma. In my MOST meditated, Ayurvedically nourished state, I believe that we are all ONE, that everyone in the world is just me living in a bunch of different bodies, blah, blah, blah. But the thought that White people have unprocessed ancestral grief that affects them today isn’t something I ever considered.
There is ancestral grief for White people in the U.S. having to do with what many of our European ancestors did when they got here. They decimated an Indigenous population through war and disease. They brought slavery to this continent. We have not reconciled with the Indigenous people of this country or the people we brought here from Africa. That grief is still there in our collective psyche. We’ve barely touched it. — Francis Weller, The Geography of SorrowSo, now what? Besides reiterating that it’s NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY TO HELP ANYONE (besides your kids) DEAL WITH THEIR SHIT, I don’t know what to tell you about how to deal with this realization. It’s just food for thought. I know that after coming to this conclusion, instead of getting mad at caucacious criminality, I look at them, chuckle, and say, “Lawd, I’m over there trippin’ again, ain’t I?. ”
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