It's official now.
We learned, about 2 months ago now that my wife is pregnant with our first child. We were in the bathroom looking at the little baton when the "cross" appeared...announcing us that life was conceived and that the two of us will be three if all went well. (by the end of May)
I think that only guys who had that experience know how it feels. It's like a life vertigo, time stop, the floor seems to distance itself from your feet and you realize that life will never be the same. Kind of like this:
To be honest, it was a surprise and my wife promised herself in the past that she wouldn't get pregnant on the first year of marriage but hey, God has a weird to laugh at us and our plans.
I'm older than her and at 31, I gotta say that I'm very happy and excited that it's happening now. I don't want to be old with a walker when my kids will reach graduation day. Also, I'm at the top of my game when it comes to being in shape and financial situation. So, I'm not scared one bit about it.
Question to guys who went through that initiation
What would be your best recommendations for an expectant father? I'm new to this and I am pretty sure that there are a lot of you who have gone through that experience.
I'm curious to know what would be your top tips on how to survive and thrive in the first year of a newborn baby.
Leave your comment below and I'll upvote the best tips.
Coming from a fellow Fommy... Get your sleep in now because there won't be much those first couple months. Also, make sure you own a good rocking chair ;)
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Fommy? 😊
Rocking chair will be essential. I'm a huge fan.
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It sort of depends on who you are in real life. What you're naturally good at, what you believe, and how you relate to your wife.
But I think the most important thing is remembering that you're probably good enough. Parenting is going to be no-shit hard sometimes. Maybe it'll be going without sleep, or dealing with colic, or letting the daily stress and exhaustion interfere with your love-life, or dealing with it when your kid bites another at day-care, losing your temper and yelling when you shouldn't. You'll make mistakes and you'll lay awake at night beating yourself up about them. There's a lot of pressure to be perfect. When that happens, remember how old we are as a people and that we have things better than anyone ever has before and even as bad as our ancestors had it -- they made it! Their kids turned out mostly OK. Yours will too. Those screw-ups that you make, they're a great opportunity to learn to do better, but they're not going to be the end of the world. Take each one as an opportunity.
Also, even for sensitive modern guys, it's sometimes easy to slip into letting your woman do more than her fair share. Keep your eyes out for that. Make sure you're stepping up. And have conversations with her about it. My wife does more school-related parenting and I do more housework. That works for us, but wouldn't for everyone. Whatever it is, do it with intent and mutual buy-in. A near-term example: your wife will hopefully be nursing the baby, you can't. But you can be the one to put Baby back to sleep after it feeds.
And remember to have fun! Being a dad is an amazing, transformative experience.
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Thanks for the tips. We stress way too much on being perfect indeed.
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Congratulations it’s a very exciting time , and at first it may be overwhelming but the little moments you have to enjoy. I gave birth to my first baby 3 months ago and man it truly changes you and every time I talk to someone it’s always about him
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Thanks @journeyoflife
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Absolutely awesome news, congratulations man! I have a 5 year old son so I'll share a few things I've learned:
It's completely different for everyone. You'll get people telling you all sorts of different things that will or won't happen. That's how it happened for them and/or someone they know. Don't assume it will happen like that for you!
Every child is different and every parent is different, don't expect things to work out a certain way and most importantly don't try to force things to be the way you expected or wanted. Go with the flow and figure out what works best for your child and your family.
Be thankful every day that your child is healthy. As you go through the pregnancy and early months after your child is born you will learn about all of the things that can go wrong which can be devastating for families. I personally know people with children who have a range of disabilities and even terminal illnesses.
It really helps to put in perspective how lucky I am to have a healthy family and I try not to ever take that for granted.
Lastly - learn how to use your time wisely! The biggest change for me after having a child (and I only have one mind you - I don't know how people do it with more!) is that I have so much less free time.
When I look back I almost can't imagine how it used to be like when I didn't have a child and had all the time in the world to do whatever I wanted - and more importantly I think about how I wasted the vast majority of that time!
Now I realize how precious my time is and I try to be very deliberate about how I spend it - like, for instance, all of the time I spend here on STEEM - which I expect will definitely be worth it in the long run.
So again - congratulations! You're in for an awesome and wild ride!
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5 star comment. Thanks for taking the time to share these tips. Every child is completely different and do have their own personalities we must negotiate with.
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Congratz to you and your wife! 31 is a good age to have your first born.
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I think so too. 😊
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congratulations to you first.
my first tip is:
2.After the baby is born,buy your wife the best lingerie you can afford cos dressing up after delivery is pretty hard.bras dont fit,pants dont fit blouses noting fits.Actually that the best gift you can give your wife.
3.Constantly remind your wife that shes beautiful and not fat.Go with her to the gym.
Just enjoy each step of the way its pretty fun and youll learn a lot.
Congratulatios to the both of you again.
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5 Star Comment. 😊 Thanks for the tips.
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Congrats!
Even if you don't always live in Quebec make sure s/he learns French.
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Congratulations. I have a 1 year old daughter and I can tell you that the experience is unlike anything else you've ever gone through in your life.
My advice to you is this:
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OH SNAP! Congratulations to you two, may you have a health and happy babygirl or babyboy
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Thanks. Still don't know which on it is.
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Congratulations to you both! What a lovely event this will be, your first child. Whatever it is I hope it is healthy and you will both help it to grow wise. It's hard work, but so very rewarding, and if you're really lucky you may one day get grandchildren! Enjoy the birth, enjoy the days ahead you're in for a lovely time.
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pretty crazy to think about grandchildren right now. 😊
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I've just something I normally never do and that is read through replies to you. What lovely advice everyone is giving you and I imagine as they got it right, they'll be giving good parental advice. You're a lucky couple and will have a wonderful time.
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Congrats! It will change your life, mostly for the better. My best advice is to enjoy a few things you can do before the kid comes. And stay close to family and friends, because they provide a much needed support system.
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Thanks @donkeypong . We do indeed need a strong support system. We are blessed on that front 😊
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Congrats and welcome to the club!!! :)
Some recommendations? Well enjoy your kid a lot because they grow sooo fast. Mine I had it in my hand "yesterday" and "today" is bigger than the mother and do not want any kisses or something like that anymore from Papa 8) XD
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It changes really fast. I plan on never take these precious moment for granted.
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Congratulations ☺️
I have many nephews and I can tell you it's hard work for the parents. However, newborns sleep like 20h/day, it's when they wake up in the middle of the night and require immediate attention that can be taxing on the parents. But all that hard labor will be forgotten once they start to walk, talk, jump around (too much). It's a blessing, they make you forget your worries. The best advice I can give you is to love your kid(s), teach them good manners and when they grow up, they will return the favor.
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You just summarised my thoughts here. Babies do sleep more and eat more and also wake up at night more. Say goodbye to uninterrupted night sleep :)
Congratulations daddy to be.
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very true @drakos 😊 Thanks for the tip.
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Congrats on becoming a father!! As far as the first year goes, don't worry too much about it. Things will come naturally. I would recommend that you take turns getting up with the newborn at night though. But most of all, You are going to be a dad!!!! Enjoy it, Nothing better in this world.
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This is such a great news! Being a parent is not easy and my tip would be treat your wife well, keep loving and caring for each other no matter how messy life gets. No child will be happier than having loving parents who respect each other. Hope the pregnancy goes well, bless your family! :)
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I've been doing my best at that since the day I met her. 😊 Not going to change anytime soon.
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My tip is to "help" give breaks to the the new mama. Even it just taking the baby for a drive to help her/he fall asleep. If you are on baby duty, make sure the mama does not hear the baby because its super stressful for the mother to hear the baby cry and its worse then just getting up and tending to the baby herself. Mamas will need solid sleep and that is hard to come by the first months or year lol. So my tip long story shorter, is take the baby into a room or away from hearing distance- This will make a happy mama and it will make you a hero dad!! :) Mother of 5 here- so I know what I am talking about. :) Your Welcome-
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5 star comment. 😊 Super excited and would love a big family like yours.
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my apologies for not following up, I was so new on here didn't know how to find my replies and comments.. I have finally found them...lol.. I hope you embrace all the different phases of a baby human lol. They go through so many changes so fast and all have their pros and cons. When my babies were always sleeping I couldn't wait for them to be more alert and smile and interact but then that means that they are awake and require more attention lol...and when they were sitting I couldn't wait for them to crawl but then again they are mobile and its alllll over!! lol savor every phase and don't take yourself too seriously and its OK to change your mind on how you want to raise them and remember all babies are different so yours may just be an angel and go through all the different phases like a pro!
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Congrats!!!! I'm over the moon for you guys! I'm clearly not a guy, but I've heard my hubbs talking to his guy freinds and it usually goes like this...
"Just enjoy it. Have fun with it, She may curse you out, let her, then rub her back or feet or leave her alone. Whatever she wants, cuz ya know she's going through making a human being, and that's crazy. Just be your best for her and the baby and take pics and eat pickles and ice cream and buy crap you don't need cuz it's all amazing and all worth it".
hope it helps lol
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It's going to be fun for sure! 😊 wise words.
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Go on a vacation before the pregnancy has reached the 6 month mark.
Anywhere. It doesn't have to be fancy or expensive.
Things are going to change for the better shortly, but everything is about to change.
Take one last trip to willingly and purposely enjoy the way that your life is today. A year from now, you can look back and remember how "boring" your life was back then.
Congratulations!!!
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Yep. We are planning on a babymoon indeed 😊
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First congratulation. This is for most people, the happiest moment. Second prepare yourself at the beginning, that it is going to be hard, since you will not sleep at all:). Anyway this is going to change your life a lot. But it is amazing change.
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Thanks man for the encouragement. 😊
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Congratulations! You have to ask @meesterboom for tips he is an absolute pro! You should use disposable nappies though and not follow their example..ha ha ha!
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Congratulations!!!!
Prep for some long nights, also @lemouth and @lamouthe have enough experience maybe ask them for some tips and maybe share the late night feeds. (lol)
I truly do wish you and the wife all the very best.
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lol ^^
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The most important thing is to support your wife in every aspect, for example with the households, taking her to the gynecologist monthly in order to know that everything is going well. You also have to enjoy this great expirience which is the right moment you are finding out how beautiful is to have your own family.
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@cryptoctopus,
Congratz dude! I could remember the feeling that I got when I heard about it! I was little nervous! But then I was happy, and I feel yeah now it's time to build a life for that child! From that day onward I am working on it! Never feel tired, I want to build a wonderful world for my son!
Hope you will get all those feelings too! God bless all of you!
Cheers~
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Thanks @guruasia It's an exciting journey ahead
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@cryptoctopus,
With your baby you will understand what is the real meaning of the happiness!
Cheers~
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Congratulations! I have yet to experience it, but a recommendation I'd give you is to be extra sweet and full of attention towards your wife, show her your love more than ever now that she is carrying your baby. That's what I'd want from my husband anyway :)
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@cryptoctopus - Congratulations Sir... Definitely you will get a lot of works to do... Try to spend your time with wife.... Make her happy & think you want to be the best father in this world... Then you will do things better & the day your baby born... You will feel it well & you will make a world to him/her.... My wishes are with you & your family Sir.....
+W+
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Thanks @steemwija 😊
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I think that in the first year of your child your help and support will be needed first of all for your wife. But from the second year with the child you can already on the carousel, and the zoo :)
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I love babies 😊 Also excited to start rough and tumble play.
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Congratulations!! How exciting!
Wishing you the best in this new phase of your lives... so much joy is coming your way.
I am not a father so I can´t give you tips. I just hope the best for you guys!
You will never walk alone! (as cheesy as it sounds, its true!)
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😊 Thanks man
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Hay congratulations, now it's time to getting 2 to 3. And I understand that you are very happy. Your life is really gonna change totally. You need to be more responsive and care of children is going to give a really different experience of life... This life comes with responsible that you have to take. Congratulations once again my dear friend.
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Thanks @funatoz 😊
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Do had get some advice for upcoming baby .
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Best word of advice is to get as much sleep before the baby is born as possible. You WILL be sleep deprived for the first 3 months at least and having no sleep debt going into it helps A LOT. She might not be able to get sleep easily the third trimester so she should start stacking up on sleep the 2nd trimester when things are typically calm.
More info on sleep debt: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep_debt
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Having a good routine and get good sleep is very important. Thanks for the tip 😊
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Congrats on the beginning of extending your family! Unfortunately I do not have any recommendations to give as I am not a father yet.
The only real tip/suggestion I can give is do not doubt yourself as a father. I only say this as I've seen some posts online about fathers questioning whether or not they are "good."
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Congratulations from the @blockbrothers team. We wish you and your wife a carefree pregnancy! The first year you only have to cuddle a lot and enjoy every moment with your child! You will see, the year flies by before you know it!
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Thanks man 😊 I will.
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Congrats man. You’ll love it. There’ll be ups there’ll be downs, but at the end of the day your life will be so much richter for it. Best wishes for the time to come. Hope the Mrs. is doing fine.
1st tip, support the wife and agree with everything. Those hormone storms will turn her into something else ...
When times are hard in the 1st year (and there will be times when you will be exhausted), keep in mind that it will be better and so much more fun with every month you pass. Walking talking Mini-you will be the shit !! trust me.
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First of all many congratulations my friend and secondly as a father i think now you have to live more actively, give more time to your wife, take your wife to doctor more frequently for checkup's and ultrasound as it is essential for the good health of the baby and ask your wife to do at least walking daily if she just laid down on bed then she might see more difficulties during pregnancy, ask her to just live a routine life, too much rest is also not good for a pregnant women.
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All good tips. Thanks man. 😊
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Congrats brother! As a recent father myself, I would say enjoy the ride and cherish each moments. I now look few month back, oh man time really flies fast...
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Oh congrats! Time does fly fast...even now. 😊
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Congratulations to you and your wife! Only advice I can give you is, learn to live on less sleep. 😂 Seriously. At least for the first 6 months to a year. Don't let your wife do all the middle of the night stuff. Alternate who gets up each time if you can. Not only because you'll both get more sleep this way and be less grumpy with each other, but also it will help you bond with the baby. Those middle of the night cuddles are simultaneously aggravating and wonderful. You don't want to be awake or doing anything, but this beautiful little person needs you! So you do what you have to, and when you finally get the baby back to sleep and are able to crawl in bed yourself, it's bliss. 😊
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i know your feelings @cryptoctopus, at this ocassion your excitement on peak.advance congratulations for both of you, and hope your cute baby bring more happiness, success and blessings in your life. my best wishes for you. Thanks for sharing your personal informations.
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The Eraserhead meme is very appropriate since much of the movie is about the anxieties being a new daddy.
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Congratulations!!
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Congrats! There are hardly any better news than this kind of announcement!
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congratulations to you, this will be very happy. I just experienced it too and still remember that time how happy..
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Congratulations :)
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Congratulations! You have got alot of good advice in the comments. So I have a little to add but it might be of importance. So here it is, lots of love and patience. Enjoy the first few years and get all the cuddle time with your son or daughter you can, because from experience after about 10 years old that time will come few and far between.
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First of all, congrats! Is a once-in-a-lifetime experience.
Then the bad news:
I joke, but I only half joke...
Signed: a father of a two years old baby.... :D
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Congratulations, idk how it feels to be like, but really liked the way you expressed it, can't be explained better than this who didn't experienced it ☺
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Wow congratulations, hope you both stay healthy and well and be nice parents to your child. But since it is about 8 Month to the birth of your child keep in mind to still enjoy the time without children. Take in mind you can't do some things when you are parents for some time and try to do it know before it is to late.
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i'm single but i've observed my brother having a hard time changing baby diapers so be ready for that. hehe. anyway, congratulations!
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congratulations!! this is the most amazing thing that can ever happen in one's life. I'm glad that you're having the most precious gift of all.
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Congratulations to you wishing you the best in life
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congrats :)
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Congratulation and Always Be Happy☺☺☺☺☺☺☺
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Congrats Bro, But Little Advise I am a man,but today I want us to discuss
about PREGNANCY.
Do you know that certain things you do when your wife is pregnant actually contributes to state of health of the mother and unborn child?
Listen, it bothers me a lot when I see men showing no concern to their pregnant wife or fail to adjust to some temporary changes!!!
It's just 9 months, not like it's forever. Pregnancy is not bought in the market, neither is it a software downloaded from the internet. It's a seed planted by us men and is germinating. There has to be a carrier of that seed while it grows, and women have been given the responsibility to carry it.
■Once in a while she would nag
■Once in a while she would request for things unimaginable e.g she wants to eat okro and bread
■Once in a while she would get so lazy to make you your meals
■Once in a while she would want to stretch her legs on your laps. Please pardon her... carrying the baby ain't easy.
Her needs may be unsatisfiable at times.
The first Tri_mester of the journey can be so annoying. Like I say women differ from each other during pregnancy.
●While most women are busy vomiting.
●Most of them sleep like water leaf, they sleep off anywhere with the slightest chance even in the kitchen.
●While most women have fever.
●Most women be looking cranky and dry like Dustin powder.
●While most women add up weight.
●Most women appear like burnt offerings.
●Some even go round with White handkerchief spitting in it. ALL THESE ARE STILL OUR WORK.....
Please tolerate this, it's beautiful afterwards.
Her attitude becomes annoying, most times you cant stand her. But I get annoyed when I see men like me neglect their pregnant wife. She's not an abomination, neither is she a curse. I must say, it's not an easy journey for all.
The last Tri_mester is when we need to be extra patient, loving, enduring and understanding.
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Congratulations and best wishes.
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I pray for you. Always be happy bro
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Congrats and make the best of it
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Congratulation daddy:) welcome to the club
resteemed
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may your child grow and bloom
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Congratulations @cryptoctopus, this post is the forth most rewarded post (based on pending payouts) in the last 12 hours written by a Superhero or Legend account holder (accounts hold greater than 100 Mega Vests). The total number of posts by Superhero and Legend account holders during this period was 26 and the total pending payments to posts in these categories was $1118.62. To see the full list of highest paid posts across all accounts categories, click here.
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Warm congratulations I wish you happiness
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Congratulation and Always Be Happy😍
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Congratulations! Best of luck to you
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Congratulations it’s a very exciting time , and at first it may be overwhelming but the little moments you have to enjoy.
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Congratulations man! I wish you all luck! I would really appreciate if you could check out my profile I am new to steemit :)
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Congratulations and welcome to the club...
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congratulations again, just do it...
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now the wonders of life just begin. congratulations for the great milestone of the life journey. @cryptoctopus
@resteemia
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haha.
sure he does! Congratulations . Baby on board! Hoot! Hoot!!
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Congratulations
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Single and never had kids, but congratulations!!
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Thanks :-)
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Wow! So many comments to read! Good luck with that :)
(Btw, I won't comment here, but congratulations once again ^^ )
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Congratulations to you two. All the best.
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Congrats! ...I too am going to be a father again. The first time is stressful. Just relax. Be smart. Put the little one first.
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Félicitation !
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Congratulations! The only recommendation is to be patient. You won’t sleep well.
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Congratz to you and your wife! 31 is a good age to have your first born.
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congrats to you, this will be exceptionally upbeat. I simply experienced it as well and still recall that time how glad..
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Congratulations again! You'll be an awesome dad.
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Congratulations and the best wishes ❤
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Donnez-lui de ton temps et de ton attention avec beaucoup d'amour ..
Give him some of your time and your kindness with a lot of love ...
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O wow! Congratulations man!
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Congratulations dear friend
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And finally you will be a father. We wish you a happy marriage full of joys and delights
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Wow i was also right that you are gonna be dady soon congratulationsssssss......
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congratulations ! You'll be a good daddy:D
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@crytoctopus a very interesting post
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Congracts! Really loved that gif and the way you you explained how it feels like. And yes life cam never be same ☺☺☺
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Nice life
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wohoo congratulations :D
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Congratulations sir! you become a daddy now!
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Congratulations @cryptoctopus!
Your post was mentioned in the hit parade in the following category:
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congratulations. all the best!
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Congratulation! It is so refreshing and wonderful to see a bloke's experience of that little cross appearing.
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Congratulation brother.
You must be happy and care your baby every time. Teach and educate him about how to walk, good attitude and many good things.
maybe for other tips you can googling hehehe
Once again congratulation
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congrats
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congrats man..
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Thank you :-)
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your most welcome.
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Congrats!!!! I'm over the moon for you guys! I'm clearly not a guy, but I've heard my hubbs talking to his guy freinds and it usually goes like this...
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Congrats!!!! I'm over the moon for you guys! I'm clearly not a guy, but I've heard my hubbs talking to his guy freinds and it usually goes like this...
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Congrats on the news. There is nothing better in the world than getting to hold that little baby. My tip is to try and spend as much time as possible with that little one as you can. They grow up so fast. I have 2 little guys and now they are both little balls of energy I just wish I had spent a few more hours holding them.
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