Swimming and Sunshine and a little understanding!!!

Today I decided to put the week behind me and start fresh! It was my almost brothers birthday! I say almost brother because even through he is not related we have been friends for 25 years and he is basically part of the furniture.

He was kind enough invite us all over for a BBQ at his new house with his wife and their kids. The big bonus being that they have a pool that everyone can jump in to escape this horrible heat.

So over we went with plans to spend the day relaxing and enjoying a swim and some good food and company. Of course the minute we arrived the kids were in the water, not that I blame them it did look very inviting.

The adults talked and the boys started up the barbie. All was going well. This is a rare occurrence as usually at least one of my children is having an off day, but things seemed to be perfect.

Once lunch was ready we had to forcibly remove the children from the pool to come and have something to eat, and that was the beginning of the end! Master 5 did not want to eat, he just wanted to swim, unfortunately with no one else in the pool this was a no go. So we had meltdown number 1.

After 30 minutes of trying to explain to him that he can’t swim alone he finally got the message and sat down to eat. Three bites of a sausage later he was done and ready for another swim lol. Miss 12 taking pity on her brother abandoned her own lunch to take him back in the pool and saved us all from meltdown number 2!

With lunch finished, they broke out the birthday cake. Even that wasn’t enough to get my lot back out of the pool. So the adults had some cake and wine while the kids played in the pool.

I braced myself as the afternoon was coming to an end. I knew it was going to be difficult to get them out of the pool and into the car. Luckily they were outnumbered. With me and my partner and my very understanding friends who have spent enough time with our children to understand that they are not being naughty they just can’t control their emotions, we each took a child and proceeded to get them ready to leave.

Master 5 and Master 7 were our toughest competition. The second they saw the towels they started. It was not a fun way to end what otherwise had been a relatively relaxing day.

45 minutes later we had managed to get them all in the car. With a quick good bye we were headed home. Not surprisingly after such a big week and a full day of swimming all four of the little kids fell asleep, and by the time we got home Master 10 was also out.

Unfortunately only Miss 1 stayed asleep when we got them out of the car at home. So the afternoon has been a series of meltdowns due to some very overtired children.

Why then you may ask do we still take them out. Because despite the meltdowns and the energy it takes to get them from one place to another, I refuse to live confined to these four walls. I want them to socialise with other children, even when it ends badly. I want them to realise that their is more to life than sitting in their rooms glued to their iPads.

If we never take them anywhere they are never going to learn how to behave in social situations and their already small little world will just get smaller.

Having friends that understand our situation is a life saver. I completely understand from the outside how my children’s behaviour can be judged. Knowing that I am able to take my children to a party or a function and not automatically be labeled a bad parent is such a relief.

So despite the somewhat unsettled afternoon, I am labelling today a success. Not because it went smoothly but because we went. We showed up. Even though it was difficult and the day would probably have been a lot less stressful had we stayed home.

If only everyone looked at my children the way my friends who know them do. Without judgement and without ridicule. Although I no longer let it bother me, it would make my life so much easier.

Thank you for reading.

@mumofmany.