We were just at one of our local parks, and the playground was packed. A little boy was playing with one of the playground toys when Cameron came up and also tried to play with it. Before @jazzyfish or I had a chance to tell him to wait his turn, the other boy's mother piped up with "Don't let him take your stuff!" Jazzyfish turned to the mother and explained that he's not trying to take it, but that he has autism and we begged for their patience.
The mom said, "I don't care."
At that point, I didn't know this happened because I was already on the way back to the car with Cameron because it was time to go - but then Carolyn told me what happened. So I went over there and spoke to her and her boyfriend/husband/large child thing and said "I understand you don't care about kids with autism." She said that's not what she said, and then the large child thing said "That's not an excuse, you still have to teach your child. I got a brother with Downs Syndrome." <----as if that's an excuse to be a total asshole.
ABSOLUTELY IGNORANT.
So as I was walking away, I made sure to turn around, and loudly tell these people (so that EVERYONE there could hear):
"You need to be more sensitive towards people with disabilities."
The entire park got quiet, and they all looked at me to see who I was talking to and pointing at. Then they got up and started going elsewhere. We even had other families coming up to apologize to us.
The next person who says anything like that to me about my child is getting punched dead in the face.
There is no rationalizing with people who think like this, and I have zero tolerance for even trying. I will gladly and proudly go to jail for assault to defend my son, or towards people who teach their children to bully people with disabilities.
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That's actually really nasty from the other parent. The thing she's teaching to any kid seeing is on the level of "Adults don't need to behave properly".
We don't teach our kids to ignore the differences of people and to solve situations by being aggressive - or at least we shouldn't.
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I feel your pain. Like most people don't understand or even know someone, yet they judge. Based on what they see at that moment. It's annoying @winstonwolfe
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man some people just don't care at all. You know one of the first thing I teached my kids was to respect others feelings. items such as toys or things in a park are not as important as someones happyness. I have said to them since a young age if someone else wants to play on something your playing with ask them if they want to share, or go on after you have finished with it.
Ignorant people like this who are bringing their kids up to there way of life will pass it down to there kids and thats why the world is full of ARSEHOLES.
Sorry this has happened to you. but more to point is your little one ok?
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He's fine. Frankly, he was in the car when all this was going on, so he likely missed it completely. His mom and I usually try to take the brunt of it so he doesn't have to. This won't last forever, and it'll be something he'll have to learn to deal with later on, but no 4 year old should have to do that.
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your right mate. i am not aloud in my daughters school any more as I punched a guy in the face, his son was bullying my kid. I don't believe in violence but the dick of a father was telling him to do it.
I am a big guy 20 stone ex-door man so when it comes to stuff like this I should play it cool. but instead I just lamped him.
When the police came to my house to arrest me as I wasn't waiting at the school they said they understood why I did it. but I am now not loud in the school grounds because of my actions.
Lucky for me we move in two weeks so i can get my daughter from school then.
I hate people who think so narrow minded, like they are the centre of the universe.
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Encouraging a child to bully should = jail time. You were in the right. Arresting you gives the message to that asshole dad that he was right. If I were you I'd sue just to finish the punch.
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My wife has been getting bullied by some of the mums in the playground, these are grown women who used to be friends of hers. a long story (I might blog about it one day) this had led to my wife and the other women who was the instigater getting a police harrasment order.
My wife is the softist person I know and only wants more friends in her life.
This has led to us moving house.
We have had to do this as the problems around where we live are getting worse.
Only last night we had 20 kids out side my house at 1am fighting. I don't want my kids around that kind of thing.
Encouraging bullying should be a sentence deffently maybe 3 months at a time. but then again how easy would it be able to prove.
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Could be easy if you use a lifelogging camera, they're pretty inconspicuous.
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hehehe I have some spy glasses that I bought my kid. maybe I use them too
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My wife is an OT specialising in ASD's in young children and we see this behaviour all the time from adults.
In this instance, the woman saying 'I dont care' is shocking and disgusting beyond belief, but dont you end up inside for twatting someone, your kid needs you more than the legal system does ;-)
You said he's 4 ? Can I ask what he's into and how severe he is ? We have kids come to the wife and the one thing they all have in common is a skill, something impressive which makes people go wow. We have a 7 year old who copies calligraphy videos from you tube and gets through a ream of paper in an hour drawing company logos! Another who leans towards music, another who at 4 years old who can name every flag in the world...there's always a skill in there somewhere mate.
Best wishes to you, your missus and the little fella :-)
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He can name every brand of car just by looking at it from down the street.
I have a folder in my browser loaded with Google image searches of about 50+ car logos, and it's like flash cards.
"Ford!"
[next tab]
"Maserati!"
[next tab]
"Volkswagen!"
[next tab]
"Lamborghini!"
[next tab]
"Audi!"
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haha excellent, I knew it :-) how cool is that....they just see the world in their own special way!
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As a thinking creature and also have feelings inside and believing a lot of things I can't still understand why some of us still are so rude and haven't got any ability of thinking. May be they are still in turn and waiting transformation... At first they are child... They do not need to know waiting their turn... And if we are adults we have patience and tolerance... When I read your story at first I get angry but then I realize that we are still in evolution... We are not done yet... I hope one day the world will be a better place for all of us...
Have a nice day...
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Thank you for this post, very interesting to read.. @winstonwolfe
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TABLE SCRAP HUNTER
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Full support to you! People's ignorance is annoying... and highly frustrating especially when you are doing all that you can to teach your children right. I too have two children with autism, my 2nd son and my daughter who is the youngest.
I recall when we were in the early stages with my son, life was a nightmare, he was very out of control even though we tried our best, people would always judge where ever we were and it got to the point where we just stopped going out anywhere because it was easier. School was always hard as I feel like you are judged there even more. You're always seen as the "bad parent", the parent with an out of control kid, like you let them run wild and take no care when all you do is the complete opposite. I ended up pulling back from friends and from people.
Yes our kids are different, yes they have extra needs, yes they see the world differently, yes they struggle with every day normal tasks, yes they can have melt downs... but they're people too with feelings and emotions as are we as their parents. But are kids are up against it even more and they don't even understand their emotions.
Parents like "that" infuriate me to no end. If only they knew... but imagine if one of our special children ended up with parents like them, we are blessed that we have the heart, the patience, the openness and the will to learn and understand.
My son is now 17. He is on the low learning end of the spectrum. He was recently granted a disability support pension because of his needs and his low IQ. He was so low in fact that he fell into the intellectually impaired range. After receiving those results I went and had him tested for Intellectual Impairment as he could have received even more support at school. He passed... even though his IQ is really low, he passed and do you know what the examiner said to me? She told me that I have done too good of a job with him... even though he is oblivious in society and never has an idea of what's going on around him, we have taught him enough skills to not stand out and to fly under the radar... That was the best compliment ever... that we had done too good of a job!
So good on you for standing up for your son, good on you for going back and good on you for trying to educate others but sadly ignorance is a choice.
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Sadly you can't fix willful ignorance.
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And that they definitely were. My other half even told them, "Google it and learn about it. As his parent, it's our job to keep people like you as educated as we can so you don't spout off stupid crap like this."
She said, "I don't have to."<----that is a choice to remain dumb.
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Sadly, this story is pretty much representative of our society these days. People are unwilling to show any empathy towards others, and any attempt to call them on it is met with excuses. Sorry that you had to put up with that bullshit.
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