Normal birth X Cesarean section

in birth •  7 years ago  (edited)

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A few days ago, I had a conversation with my friend – pregnant woman, expecting her second child.
I couldn't believe that what she was telling me... She hopes, she will give a birth by Cesarean section again. She is too afraid of giving birth by natural way, because it's too much painful. Her firts child was delivered by Cesarean and she has no experience with a natiral birth.
I was in shock – honestly, I still am... Because I have got two beautiful girls – the first one was born by natural way and the second was delivered by Cesarean section. So, I can compare it. And I think, the most of mothers who choose the section voluntarily instead of natural birth, because they are afraid of pain are badly informed – they have no idea what are they going in to.

So, let me compare it for you a bit - my personal experience.

Firstly the natural birth. Yes! It really is very painful. There definitely are moments when you think you are dying and you can't stand it any more. Sometime it feels, like your body must explode every moment. It can be really long time in the pain. But at the moment, when the pain was the worst I could do somethink – push. Push the pain away. And then suddenly it's over and any mother doesn't think of the pain, because she see the newborn baby. And pain is over.

I didn't even recognized when the doctor cut me during the labour. I didn't feel it at all.
I remember the doctor, how she told me I have a beautiful healthy girl and I heard her crying and in the very moment I didn’t think about some pain. I had my daughter on my chest and I couldn’t believe it. She was so beautiful.
My husband wasn't there at the moment, he was late. He came at the moment, when doctor stitched me and I was holding my daughter on my chest.
I didn't pay much attention to what is happening around me. I remember just my daughter and my husband. Doctors let us there in peace for two hours.
Then they took my daughter to wash her, give her some cloths etc. I was moved to my hispital roomand shortly after surprised me a nurse, who came and told me she is there to help me get up from my bed and take a shower, but it wasn’t so hard.
My legs were weak, I felt a bit dizzy, but nothing so bad. So I was able to take care of my daughter since a very first moment. And because everything was ok, we were able go home three days later in the hospital... but I felt able go home much earlier.
I wasn't able to sit properly about five days. But I was surprised, how fast my body recovered. It took around ten days and I didn't feel any pain and I barely remember the pain of giving birth. I felt strong and healthly... I just would appreciate more sleeping :)
It surprised me, but I think, there must be some self defence in mother’s mind, the hormones probably. I don't know and I don’t care – it works and it works damn well.
What I do remember from delivery of my first daughter is a joy, pure happiness... but no pain.

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With my first daughter shortly after her birth

After this experience I expected a beautiful delivery of my second daughter. I was so looking forward it!
But things didn’t go so well like before. Doctors was afraid of preeclampsia and recomended me don’t wait and cause the birth a bit. I was in hospital two days before, because of my high blood presure. I already had some contractions and I had no objection of make it faster. I wanted to see my daughter, be home. I was impatiente and tired from the long waiting.
It was a misfit. My body didn’t let us to make if faster. Doctors drain the water away and it stopped my contractions and stopped the runing labour – it’s very anusual, normaly it make it faster, but it worked by the very opposite way to me. Even hectoliters of oxytocin didn't help to make my contractions strong enough to give a birth. After all night of trying, doctors told me they have no oter chance but make a Cesarian section. And I was finaly cryin. I didn’t want to.

I had a luck, because in an operation room I meet my good friend – she works in the hospital, but I hadn’t idea she is there at the moment, so we were surprised to see each other at this situation. Budweis is nit a big city... :)

I chose a spinal anesthesia instead of full sleeping. I willed to see my daughter.
The spinal anestesia is good, you can’t feel your body, but you can stay awake and move your hands and head. Everyone around me were great – the anestesilog, doctor and my friend who asisted to doctor, nurses...
Everyone was trying to keep me in a good mood. It took only three minutes from a first cut to delivery my girl and she was screaming aloud.
My friend told me she is angry of them because they pulled her out :) Of course she was...

A nurse showed her to me, but I was able only kiss her head, because the anesthesia died out my arms as well. (ouch)
I told the nurse take our girl to her father, who was waiting out of operating room. Because I wasn't able hold her and whisper how much I love her. He had to do it instead of me and he did.

At the time I was was lying down on operating table trying guess what doctors are doing inside my belly.
They were quite busy and time to time I felt terribly dizzy. It’s not easy vomit when you are paralyzed on your back. It took a half of an hour and after they mooved me to Intensive Care Unit and on the way I started to feel my body and I was hitted by terrible pain. The pain was surprisingly strong and I wasn’t able to stop my moaning.

I wasn’t alone on ICU, there were another two mothers. They weren't talking, moving or moaning like me, so I felt like a weak one and I was thinking if they are in the such pain as me. They were calmed down by strong opiates :)
Nurse came with an injection and told me it’s a very strong pain killer, some opiate and it should help fast. But it didn’t and soon we realized the opiates doesn't work to me and I'm intolerant... just very high, but still feeling the pain. I felt the pain as strong as before and I wasn’t able even take my phone and write a message to my family. Both my arms was full of injections, I had an electrods on my chest and a tube which started inside my belly and drained blood and some other liquid out of my belly into glass bottle under my bed.
Later they gave me some different painkiller and it helped, but the pain was still there. Just not so strong. I was finaly able sleep a bit. A second day, came a nurses, told me it’s time to get up, go to bathroom and to toalete. I thought, she must be kidding me, but she was serious...
I wasn’t able even turn to the side in the bed,because of the pain, my belly was stitched a day before and I had to get up, walk and hold the bottle with tube from my belly... no excuses.

So, I did. It was the worst pain in my life and after a few steps I was exhausted. Doctors told me I’ll be moved soon to normal room and I’ll be there with my daughter and taking care of her. And if everything gonna be ok, I’ll go home after five days after the surgery.
I was looking forward to be with my daughter, but I was afraid I’m not able to take care of her. How could I? I’m hardly able to go to toalete by my own... But on ICU I didn’t see her very much, nurses brought her a few times for a little while and I saw her little face covered by scratches – she was crying alone on neonatologi unit and scratched her face.

My friend who assisted to the doctor during the surgery came visit me a few times and I was asking her, how many stitches is in my belly. She told me some details about the Caeserian section (not nice).
There are six levels of tissue, which are stitched one after one. Starting by uterus, including muscles, finishing by skin. It is really huge belly operation and normally, after operations like this, are patients keeping lying on ICU for five days.
But not after Cesarean section, because mothers must take care about their newborns. Mothers are going home after five days and in some hospitals in Czech it’s only three days... At home are not painkillers and even if would, it’s not good to take it, because it’s not good for a breast feeded child. And at home, mother must take care about the child fully.
I was trying my best to be strong and brave and take care about my daughter – it wasn’t easy, but the fifth day after delivery we were ready to go home. The pain was still there, not so terribly strong like at the beginning, but still... even getting up from my bed was pretty challenging.

My daughter is six months old now and I still feel my belly. It was painful for very long time and it’s still pretty sensitive.

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Six months old scar on my belly. My doctor told me the scar is very nice.

And another aspect of the Cesarean section is my psyche. I don’t feel like I was giving a birth. Someone other did it. I still think about what I did wrong and I miss the beautiful emotions which came with the delivery of my first daughter.

So, if someone thinks that Cesarean is painless... Ouch, is terribly wrong notion. It’s much more painful then the natural birth. Womens organs are created to recover from injuries caused by childbirth pretty fast. If doctors must stitch some skin – it’s still just a skin, not six levels deep in a belly.

I don’t think I’ll have more children in my life. But if I do, I hope from the deep of my soul (and my belly), I’ll give a birth by natural way. Cesarean not any more!

If you have a strong stomach (very strong ...), there are plenty videos from the operating room on Youtube. Simply enter "Cesarean". Example under this text... Don't dare if you are not strong enough!

I don’t want to scare future mothers by Cesarean. Sometimes it can be really necesary and it can safe mother’s and baby’s lifes. But if you are afraid of pain during giving birth. Be sure – Cesarean is NOT painless. If you can manage the pain of Cesarean, you can manage the pain of natural birth easily. And recovery from natural birth is much easier, faster and you can pay all your attention to your precious newborn baby and enjoy the miracle fully.

I think that child birth is a bit demonized by telling about the pain. But no one tells about the pain and troubles of Cesarean section. I was pretty surprised by all of it and I can’t understand why someone would chose it voluntarily instead of natural birth.

Believe me! I can compare it ;)

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We have a two year old girl, I followed the whole process of born closely, my wife was brave in opting for natural childbirth, here in Brazil there is a medical culture of almost obliging women to accept cesarean not only for money, but for time. However, it is the right of the couple to decide this and be strong not to give up. It is certainly much healthier and practical, the pain is a small detail, my wife says she can not even remember the pain, it is momentary.
Greetings from Brazil!

I have heard about some countries, where women are pushed to accept a cesarean instead of a natural birth. I still can't believe it, but it's a truth as I see. It's very sad. I wish luck to all your family! Be strong with a second child as well ;)

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