Is this how Bitcoin price is determined?!

in blockchain •  7 years ago  (edited)

After years of digging, top TA chartists have finally come to a conclusion what drives Bitcoin price. Read below what we have found out unofficially:

When is everyone going to realize that the price of bitcoin is dependent on two things? Which side the coin lands on, and where the darts land on the board. Because this is how bitcoins price is determined.... 
Somewhere there exists a room, and in this room, there are men. Every day, these men have two important objectives. First, they gather round a table in a circle, and on this table is a box. From this box, a coin is produced. On one side, there is a green vertical bar. On the other side is a red one. Next, the spinner from the game twister is pulled from the box. It is placed on the table, and given a spin by the previous days coin flipper. The person who it is pointing towards when it comes to a rest, is the days Market Maker. This person is handed the coin, and flips it high into the air. The previous result of the coin flip is irrelevant. What has happened the day before belongs to yesterday. What happens today, belongs to the coin. Ah, it has landed on Red Bar. One of the men from the circle exclaims, " So it has been decided, today the market will go down!" "huzzah!" say the rest. 
Then, a a dart is pulled from the box. The one who flipped the coin is handed the dart. He then walks to a line that is drawn twenty meters from a board with hundreds of numbers on it ranging from 0 all the way to 2000. The majority of the numbers represented fall between 0-500. With a couple spots on the board reserved for values between 501-2000. There is one spot in the middle which says "wild". This leaves the decision up to the days tosser. 
He lets the dart fly. "Thud". Cheers erupt from the others, as one man announces "It is settled. Today, bitcoin will drop by $350". 
The group of men then goes to a computer, clicks a red button on the screen that says down, enters 350 into another box, and then pushes a button that says "Delayed bot activation +1 Hr". Then, they exit the room, walk down a long tunnel, and up a set of stairs, and out a set of storm doors, emerging into the bright morning sun. Beneath their feet, is sand. Nearby waves crash upon a pristine shoreline, completely untouched by footprints. Two of the men push one another as they race to the waters edge, laughing every step of the way. 
At the same time, thousands of men across the world sit in front of their computers, drawing lines, circles, triangles.... making calculations...applying formulas...intersecting arrows and blobs.. and any number of other methods to try to predict something. Something that was already decided an hour ago on a small, undisclosed island in the southeast Pacific...

source: tradingview.com

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