It is sad to hear this. We can try as a community to uplift you. But this is not the way to do that. Better create a quality post or make a comment related to this post. Firstly get acquainted with other steemians by engaging through comments and discord channels.

There are a lot of steemians who live in pathetic conditions than yours try hard to bring in quality and they succeed. I hope one day you will be successful..All the best!