Subject: Considering the Environment?

in blockcorp •  8 years ago  (edited)

I've been standing in front of the printer for several minutes considering the environment before printing my many emails.Is there a certain length of time I should consider the environment for? It would be more productive if I could just consider once a week rather than each time I print. Please let me know the official standing on the issue.

Sincerely,
Renee Nouveau
Public Relations for the
Secret Society Division


From the Email Archives of the BlockCorp Industries Servers:

If doing something is really hard, it's not worth doing at all.
-Homer Simpson

Special Halloween Plot: Ken Kenderson has gone missing! Scrawled in blood on the inside of his cubical wall are the immortal words "Please Consider the Environment".

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to.Renee Nouveau
Subject. re considering the enviroment

Dear Renee,
our automated productivity assesment system has flagged you for further investigation after several minutes of inactivity this afternoon. please report to room 101 at your earliest convieniance to explain you poor work ethics.

with regards
N Parker
Head of Productivity

To: N Parker
Subject: Re: Re: Considering The Environment

Ms Parker,
I wasn't aware the automated system scanned employees at Management Level Ω and higher. I'll certainly stop by after I stop considering the environment.
In the meantime, I'd like to report a case of non-productivity! Ken Kenderman hasn't replied to my email for over 50 minutes! How rude.

Warmly,
Renee Nouveau
Public Relations for the
Secret Society Division

BCI +1

...this could spark a l o n g t h o u g h t or a series of many many thought thoughts...

To: Upper Management Distro
Subject: re: considering the environment

Dear management,

In our best efforts to consider the environment, and as chief of the IT department (the interdimensional technologies dept, not the "other" IT), we've been importing various plant species from across the multiverse to be "considered". However, Ken Kenderson caused quite the ruckus about our "invasive screening procedures" and made off with several Class Q plants. These plants are very dangerous and should not be allowed outside of their specified containment vessels. Please have the plants returned and have Ken review the policies in the "preventing interdimensional harassment" guide.

Thanks,
~QA