My Struggles With Autism

in blog •  7 years ago  (edited)

I made a video like this on my main channel before I re-branded. The video was called "why I hate being autistic" I do hate having autism, but I think its more of the struggles. So I talk about those.
Please note, I am NOT speaking for everyone, these are MY struggles

  1. processing information
    Now what I mean by this, and I am explaining in my own words, where you will get confused when someone is explaining something to you. So say you're explaining the weather to me, how you explain it may be hard for me to pick up and you will have to explain it another way. Some people will be nice enough to explain, others won't. I had this happen when someone insulted and called me names because I was having trouble understanding a situation.

Finding A Job
This is why I am unemployed. Its hard finding a job with the setting a require. I basically require a setting that doesn't have a lot of people, and not a lot of noise. Noise has always been my trigger. When I was little, my folks got me a toy driving car, it have a siren on it and I was scared to death of the siren and my folks had to take it off. Think of me as the opposite of a walker. Noise attracts walkers on the Walking Dead, but noise will make me want to get away from the setting. And if I just walk off the job, that can go against me. This is called sensory overload. Meltdowns can be a result of this, say I have one on the job, I'll get fired. To avoid all this, find a job with the right settings, you have to think grocery stores get very busy at certain parts of the day. And I get very anxious around a lot of people.

Offending People
This is a titanic sized problem. offending people unintentionally. Now you might be wondering how is this possible. I am not talking about "you're stupid" "you're ugly" I am referring to something the person could take offense to and I will not know. Here is an example. I hate father's day, because my dad left me when I was 2 or 3. A friend posted that she hated the day, because her dad died. When I commented, she implied my dad is still alive. I made posts on Facebook that I did not have a dad, I guess she didn't see it. When I implied that her dad loved her before he passed away. She took it as I was judging her (when I had no intention to judge) I don't even see how it was judging. She said "you dad is alive" so that is an obvious clue her dad is dead. Maybe she didn't get along with him but his death still hurt her. Either way I had no intentions to offend or judge her. The thing is, and I am not speaking for everyone. But someone with autism won't know was appropriate to say or not, that's where it comes from. You may be saying you should think if someone said it to you. Also, keep this in mind. Someone can make a fat joke about someone else and that person takes it as a joke, someone can make a fat joke about you and you take it to heart.

Ignorance
With great power comes responsibility. There are people who are ignorant towards people with autism. One bout I face was, last summer, I went thought the department of human services, because I thought they would help me find a job that's right for me, I had to see a councilor first, and she had the damn nerve to say I wasn't autistic because of how I talked. i can't believe people are this dumb. Autism has nothing to do with how you talk. I say this is ignorant because it is just wrong, to tell someone they don't have something because of one factor. Everyone is different. I may not have autism the same as you, but that doesn't mean I don't have it. And you think someone who specializes in disabilities would know that. She made me not wanna deal with her. Also when I told her the structure I required on a job, she refused to listen. She didn't care about how I was hurt in the past. When i told her I tried to kill myself after a director screamed at me for struggling on a dance move, she didn't' care. I never met someone so damn ignorant in my life.

so that's it folks, be sure to leave a like and a comment. And follow for more content.

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Good post and I could relate to a lot of it. Finding employment is problematic for me too. I thought about it carefully and realised that I always felt relaxed and comfortable in a library setting, so I did a 9 month masters degree in Information and Library Studies and am now a qualified librarian. I have still to find a job, but I only graduated three months ago. It's a quiet environment, not a lot of people. What are your interests. Good luck and I do hope you find a job soon

I am interested in technology (phones computers etc)

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