Have you ever experience where at first you are so head over heels with someone but later on when you feel that things are getting serious you will start becoming distant leaving other hurt and confused? Or were you the one who was left hurt and confused?
Commitment, either in life-decisions or relationships, is a scary word for some people. Someone with a genuine fear of commitment is known to have commitment-phobia or relationship anxiety, and they generally have a serious problem in staying in a relationship for the long-term. It can be very difficult to understand why a lover can be commitment-phobic.
For me, I think these are some reasons why some people is afraid of commitment with relationship:
• letting the past predict the future or scared of past hurts occurring again, and find it difficult to trust that things will be different in their current relationship
• they feel trapped
• it's still early to be bound with one person
• you're "too busy", you probably think you have no time for any new commitments
• too full of herself/himself and think that the other person don't deserve them
• afraid that one day either of them will fall out of love
• afraid he/she can't meet the other person's expectations.
But there are also things to help you overcome commitment phobia,
• Face your fear of commitment and remember that life can be more rewarding when you take risks
• Pinpoint what it is you’re really afraid of – are you scared of getting hurt again? Is it fear of rejection or perhaps fear of losing your freedom?
• Let go of any past hurt, in short move on
• Date only when you are happy with yourself and feel 100% ready
• Take your time in dating someone and make sure you've shared values and aligned ambitions
And when dating someone with commitment issues you have to be patient and understanding, help them overcome their fear. Encourage them not to over-think things or spend too much time worrying about what the future might hold.
It is only when they have overcome their fear can you enjoy a happy, healthy relationship, so give them the time and space they need.
This my own opinion, feel free to comment your own opinions. I would like to hear what others think. :)
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@anamaris, loved ur article. Just to add a point. Being single is also not to bad. Love life on your own terms. Make the world your family. Touch lives as many as u can. Never be afraid of commitments. Commit on ur whim.
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Hi, nice post! leaving here my grain of sand of this subject:
Usually we men are afraid of being with just one partner for the conditioning that society has inculcated in us of being a party boy and so on. Besides, commitment, having goals, wanting to accomplish sometime in life is a difficult path, going from party to party, having tons of girls, not doing anything with your life and focusing on making money to spend it in trivial thing is easier so, the mind tends to go for the easier path.
Regards!
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