My Life's Journey - Life's Card Game - Part 7 - Twists And TurnssteemCreated with Sketch.

in blog •  6 years ago  (edited)

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Twists And Turns

So on the third day, my oldest brother Minja arrived, and all three of us kept visiting our father throughout the next couple of days. Basically for the next 2-3 days or so my father's condition was improving little by little. And, we were happy about it, but like the other day's doctors still were not being to able to tell us what is happening with him. The good news was that the mass on his brain has stopped growing and it has stabilized. We were not sure was it because of the healing technique I was doing or because of some drugs, there were giving him. It really did not matter as long as he was getting better.

If it was up to my father he would already be home. He hated hospitals and wanted to get out of there as soon as possible. He was not allowed to leave his bed and he had to do all his "business" in his bed which was very demoralizing for him. My father was not realizing if he falls again, it could be the last time he falls. In his mind, he thought he was all good, but in reality, it was far from the truth. Especially when it comes to brain injuries. It can all change very quickly...

If you missed the first 4 parts of the story you catch up by clicking below:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6

Trying To Be Patient

One of the hardest things for us was to see our father in the condition he was every day and even hardest was to wait for the doctors to finally diagnose him. Just simple unending waiting and unknowing is the worst feeling at this moment. Not knowing what the next day might bring and worrying about what might come next? We were all under a tremendous amount of stress and we were all dealing with it in our own way.

When another 5 days have passed we started questioning if the doctors in this hospital are capable of helping my father? Because every time we would talk to his doctor she would sound even more unconvincing than the last time. It really seemed like she had no clue what to do next? Or, how to help my father? So we have started making some calls in the background to one our friend who is working in a different bigger hospital if he can help us? We just did not feel confident about this hospital and these doctors at all.


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At the time, my father was receiving many types of "medications" for many various different things. But the main problem they had besides the mass on the brain was keeping his blood in check for the heart. After he had heart surgery, and artificial valve installed he had to take a drug called Martifarin for the rest of his life to keep his blood at a certain density or he could have another heart attack. So why am I telling you this? It is because as soon these doctors heard he was using this drug for a long time they suspected this drug is the cause of the mass on his brain. As one of the biggest side-effects of this drug was that it can create brain hemorrhage. They call it "cure" but you can die from it=modern medicine. This was just one of the things they suspected. As they ran more test they found some other things as well.

Diagnosis And Treatements

During these 5 days, we got about 7-8 different diagnoses on what is wrong with our father. The also found something on his left lung as well. But again with the inability to do the magnetic resonance, they had no idea what it was. But, they suspected it could off been a tumor or something caused by some type of bacteria. I don't recall the name now, but this type of bacteria can spread from lungs, through blood, and create the same thing they were seeing on his brain. I mean it was just one diagnosis after other guys, and none of them was confirmed. They were calling doctors in Zagreb(capital city) and Split(our friend's hospital), but none of these doctors wanted to take any responsibility and actually give us the diagnosis. It felt like they were just throwing the "ball" of responsibility from one court to the other hoping one of these doctors would take responsibility and write the diagnosis. They all wrote in their reports "maybe" it is this or we "suspect" it is this. Carefully written guys, so they do not take any kind of responsibility if something takes a wrong turn with my father.


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So they started treating my father with I do not know how many more "medicines" and antibiotics. I mean a lot of different types and for different types of diagnosis which were never confirmed!!! So basically guys, they did not know what is wrong with him so they decided to treat him for everything...Wtf right? Meanwhile, my father started to get fewer over the night and day and his condition got worse during the next days. He was forgetting things, even more than before, and he would sleep through most of our visits.

We were worried about if his worn out body will be able to take all these "cocktails" of drugs they were giving him? The only thing we can do was to be there for him through all of this. On some days the fever would calm down and he would be "ok", but on some others days he would have a hard time breathing, and even keeping his eyes open. We just did not feel like he was treated the right way.

Losing Patience And Here Comes A "Doctor"

It really seemed guys like they were just treating the symptoms and not the cause of the problem. We felt like they had no clue on how to treat our father. So we started to make some calls because we had some connections in the other hospitals, so we can transfer our father to a different hospital in the city called Split where our friend works. It was a bigger hospital, and we had a friend there to keep an eye on him. All we need to do is to get the signature from his current doctor in this hospital so she allows the transfer. She told us if we can find him a bed in a different hospital she will sing the release form for the transfer.

We started making some calls, and by the end of that day, we have found him a bed in a hospital in Split. All we had to do was go in the next day, and get the signature for the transfer. It seems like a done deal right? Well, let me tell you what happens next? Our friend which works in a hospital in Split was in contact with these doctors in Sibenik and he arranged the transfer. But, as we were visiting our father, "specialist" walked into the room, and told the nurses to clear the room in the most arrogant way possible. He had that special kind of surgeon glasses on him. He seemed nervous and irritated. Maybe because we started putting pressure on the hospital? It reminded me so much to a doctor who first checked out my father in the ER back when it all started...


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We had to leave the room as he alone examines my father. It took him about 10 min and he walked out of the room without telling us really anything. So we walked back into the room and we ask our father what happened? He said nothing much really, he just asked him some questions and looked at his eyes. And, that was pretty much it. My oldest brother started calling his friend in Split to maybe find out what just happened?

The New Diagnosis

So as Nikola and I were talking to our father about the "specialist" visit and just making small talk with our father, while Minja was on the phone outside the room. We were all anxious about what just happened and waited for my brother to finish the call. And, after a couple of minutes, Minja walks into the room with a pale look on his face. It was not the look we all wanted to see. He walked to us and right there in front of our father and says:

He is done, he has Sepsis. He is not going to make it.

What??? I was so pissed at Minja saying that right in front of our father? How can you not have any little common sense? Why in the hell would say that right in front of him? And, in the manner like all is lost? And, especially not being confirmed it is SEPSIS. I was so pissed guys, but I did not show it. I stayed calm for my father's sake, as I did not want him to start worrying even more. But, seriously, how in the heck did he think it is a good idea to come in front of our father and say "he is gone." Especially with our father being in front of us still BREATHING... He already buried him in his mind. I was furious guys. I think he saw in my face for a couple of seconds how mad I was at him.


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Both Nikola and were trying our best to keep the atmosphere as positive as possible with the circumstances. No matter what the diagnosis was from the "specialist" we just kept encouraging our father to keep fighting no matter what. Because the last thing we wanted our father was to lose hope as Minja did. Then all would be lost. When it comes to recovery it is important no matter what to keep the HOPE. Keep the hope for you, and give the hope to your loved ones. Yes, be realistic, but keep the HOPE alive. And, one way you can make someone lose HOPE is to come in front of him and say you're gone. Like my brother Minja did. Words are powerful guys, and we should all be careful about how we use them. It can be a difference between somebody giving up or pushing forward. It can be a difference between life and death...

You have to BELIEVE no matter the circumstances thing will get BETTER.

To be continued...

What can I tell you guys? Twists and turns kept coming and the only thing we could do is to roll with "punches..."

Thank you all for reading, and all your support, much love,

dbjegovic 💕 💞 💓

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When my mother had her heart attack/stroke (yes. both. at the same time) she caught about 3 real breaks.
1 My brother's neighbor walked in to 'say hello' at just the right time.
2 The people at the regional hospital did not piss around for even a minute. They flew her the 10 miles to the 'big hospital'.

  1. Normal rotation doctor assigned was the premier heart guy in the state. He was head of the department but took two cases per month to check on his skills and his staff's skill. Amazing what the big dog can do in the right circumstances.

And they didn't know about my mother's living will until after my kid brother got there and the heroic measures were already done. Otherwise they'd have let her go.

I'm sure glad I know this turns out well, because right now it's not sounding so good.

Sometimes when it is not your time to go. God makes sure there are people around you at the right place and at the right time. That is the only way to explain it. Things just fall in place...

Well, I think I said it before, but this is a long story. We are at about day 10 of a 4-month long journey to my father's recovery.

oh my, not sepsis! I wish your brother had not said that....not what your dad needed to hear. @awakentolife, this is so frightening. So many medicines, all interacting with different side effects. So scary...your stomach was a mess I'm sure.

It was not what any of us wanted to hear, but for me, somethings did not make sense... I will explain my train of thought why about it when I heard it in the next part.

The thing my friend I was ignoring my body completely at the time and I really did not feel anything at the time all of this was happening. After it was all finished is when it all started to release and create problems.

Thank you for reading, have an amazing day. :)

It is because as soon these doctors heard he was using this drug for a long time they suspected this drug is the cause of the mass on his brain. As one of the biggest side-effects of this drug was that it can create brain hemorrhage. They call it "cure" but you can die from it=modern medicine.

You know. I honestly remember when medicine would help you!!! Not just kill you in a different way.

I have to admit though, it's been a long time.

Well, the patient cured stops being the customer. That is mostly what today medicine is like. They create customers in most cases rather than cured people. It is a sad truth...

I understand why people -- especially in this country -- choose to "die on their own terms." I've decided that's the choice I'd make. I'm so glad things finally worked out for your father. I really want to hear the happy ending on this one. Bless you all -- for your courage and strength and persistence.

Well, I can understand it as well. Especially when seeing what happens in hospitals up close and personal. We were lucky in so many ways as you will see in the next parts. But, I think the most important of all we never lost hope. :)

I cannot believe , well let me rephrase that I do believe your brother said that but cannot not understand why he would say it like that right in front of your father

you have me sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for the next installement

no upvote sorry but I will leave a !tip

Brother, I was wondering the same thing... I think he panicked and overreacted. Emotions of hearing about the diagnosis got the better of him. That is the only way I can explain it...

Brother, I kid you not, even though there are 7 parts already we are far from the end. Even though I am leaving some parts out it is still turning out to be a long story... We are at about day 10 of 4 months of things happening...

Thank you for reading, and for the tip brother. Have an amazing day. :)

That could well be it, people react to stress in different ways and we have to be understanding of that

You to have an amazing day

Oh dear - that's a dreadful thing to say in front of a sick person. When I was a very small child I had a very serious illness over several years, and I was deeply traumatised by it. Some of the memories of this period came back to me much later in dreams and nightmares. One memory was of a doctor visiting and saying to my parents, in a low voice, "It doesn't look good." I was probably too young to even understand most of what adults said, but even small kids can pick up things like this, and it's really not good for morale!

It really was and I was really pissed at him. It is something you should never do. For everything, there is time and place. And, the right way to say it. It is not certainly the way my brother did it. Especially, since what he said was not confirmed at all...

Sorry that you are experiencing all of this... these times are the most trying for everyone involved (I remember the time during that my own father passed away), and there are often things said and done that accidentally have long term impacts... everyone is stressed and upset... keep in mind that your relationships with your family will continue, and we all make mistakes in stressful situations!

Best of luck with staying strong as a family!

I do agree with you @bengy. Sometimes people make mistakes, and that is ok. Nobody is perfect. I think he panicked and the emotions got the better of him. It can happen to any of us...

Thank you for your kind words, and support. Have an amazing day. :)

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Uf... What to say, I understand your anger for them treating him for everything but imagine if they decided to not treat him for anything because they did not have a diagnosis, would that be better? Maybe all those drugs helped, you never know. Sorry to say but your brother is an asshole for declaring alive man dead in front of him lol, I would have punched him if I were you :D Looking forward to see how the story continues. Much love 💚

Well, to be honest, what I know now somethings they were doing were not right. And, this is where my frustration came from about it later. I think the way the treated him anyone can be a doctor today. Just pop the pills and injections into a person and hope it works? It does not make sense to me. But, that is my personal opinion. It does not have to be right. Maybe like you said all those drugs helped in some way.

Well, honestly, I had no time to deal with him as I have expected already he would do something eventually. It is round and round in circles with him. I had more important things to think about.

I will write the next part soon. Thank you for your amazing comment. Much love to you as well, my amazing friend. :)

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