The ways you can fail a handshake

in blog •  7 years ago  (edited)

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In my previous post I mentioned the awkward moments of handshaking and I would like to dedicate this whole post on that. There are many ways to shake hands with another person. Is there a right one? Well, yes there is.

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Let’s see the ones you should avoid.

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The Dead Fish

This is when someone gives you a “no-bone” hand and even though you were going for firm handshake, you cannot do anything with it. You feel that a “manly” handshake would melt this disgusting dead thing you’re holding right now.

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The Hand Crusher

Don’t overdo it -we can meet somewhere in between the dead fish and the crusher right? This shows two things. The first one is that you show some enthusiasm and the second one is that you are an idiot. By making me cry internally from pain and literally shock me by hearing my bones cracking the only thing you achieve is to go hide whenever I see you.

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The Sweaty Palms

I know it’s not your fault since some people tend to sweat more than others. I have completely dry hands and when someone gives me a sweaty hand I don’t enjoy it that much. As a matter of fact I'm struggling to hold it as it tends to slip away. However you can dry your hands a bit on your sweater before a handshake.

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The Queen Finger Tips

And suddenly I end up holding you’re finger tips! What?! I’m not the Queen, you’re not the Queen so lets just avoid that. Especially when men do this I’m like SERIOUSLY??? You’d better give me a hi 5 or a fist bump instead of THAT dude.

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The Dominator

In slow motion this goes like… You move your hand towards the other person’s hand in a 90 degree angle, you meet the hand and tadaaa the other one flips your hand down and gets his on the top. What the heck! Are you serious? We are just meeting each other and you choose to start like this? Screw you.

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The Won't Let Go One

Handshaking is supposed to last for some seconds not a life time. It's not handcuffs, it's handshake.

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The Right One

Normal power, grip, “humidity”, duration and angle. That simple!

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I was about to say to you that the way a "good" handshake is defined probably varies from region to region in this old world of ours.

But then, after finding this, I realized that you, being Greek, probably have some kind of inherited right to set a standard:

"It’s become so ubiquitous that you may never have thought about why people shake hands. The history of the handshake dates back to the 5th century B.C. in Greece. It was a symbol of peace, showing that neither person was carrying a weapon."
https://deepenglish.com/2014/07/handshake-history-listening-fluency-116/

That's very interesting isn't it? How it first started and then formed to the way it is used today. I have to admit that every time your comments are so informative and interesting! So thank you for that :)

It's also true that a good handshake varies from place to place so I guess I'm focusing more on "local" ones :)

Hi @eliakon . Regards for me. Hope we will be friends.

Λάτρεψα το handshake στον διαιτητή αλλά και αυτό του Γιούνκερ χαχαχαχαχα

Κι εγώ γέλασα πολύ μ'αυτά όταν τα βρήκα :P

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

lol? A post about handshakes not featuring Donald Trump? That is blasphemy! You are lucky I am in a good mood or I would ha ve flagged this!

hahah I bet you're right! He is the king of handshakes! What an omission! :/

Hehehe. That was great joke. Great funny blog. Keep posting #jokeofday

Thank you! :)

How will we classify such a way of handshaking? )))
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hahahah Awesome! :P

I hate the "dead fish" and the "queen finger tip"!!
Handshakes are a big indicator for someone's personality...
Something else that I consider very important when I shake hands with someone is eye-contact...! If it's not there, it's disrespect...

I agree! By a handshake you get an idea of the other person's personality! Eye contact indeed is of same importance! :)

Hey :) I have nominated you for #sevendaybnwchallenge :) see my last post for more information :D it's funny

This gif is diabolical!!

The Sweaty Palms

I sweat a lot in the gym, when people want to give me a handshake i always go for the fistbump, i could try to wipe it on my shirt but i think my hand would become even more sweaty! Especially since my gym is inside a warehouse, in the summer the temperatures get to 40 degrees celcius!

The Won't Let Go One

I have a friend that does this every single time ahahah! he doesn't let go and looks straight into my eyes with a creepy face, it's awkward when he does it in public xD

hahah It's something between cute and diabolical I guess :P (isn't it?)

I agree with you that the fist bump is always the best solution in such environments..

I have to admit that your friend is a bit scary :P

Diabolical? @eliakon i was listening to this when the gif showed up

So you tell me if it's cute, you listen to the song while looking at the gif xD

hahahahahaha Ok you won! :P
(Btw Vikings is one of my favourite series!!!)

Also one of mine, haven't checked the last season, damn steemit is addictive

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hahaha τέλειο!