Icky is ... as Icky Does ...

I have been Icky for a long time. And I relish the name! One might ask, How is that possible?

Truth is, Icky is a term of endearment that was lovingly bestowed on me by my daughter, Jessi, at a very young age. Jessi, you see, views the world through a different lens than most people. She was born developmentally delayed ... that means she is labeled as "special needs" ... or as one insensitive educator told me once ... she is mentally retarded.

We don't use the "retarded" word at our house. Not in any context.

Anyway, association with stories and characters in movies has been one of Jessi's most effective ways of communicating since she was small.

The Wizard of Oz is one our family's all-time favorites! And Jessi had a special attachment to it during the years when she was first learning how to talk. She took great delight and assigning each of us our own personal roles in her personal yellow-brick-road story.

Jessi, of course, was always Dorothy. And Pete, the mighty dog, was always Toto. Imagine a wide-open, hard-headed, stubborn Jack Russell easing on down the road with Dorothy and her friends!

Jessi's dad was the lovable Cowardly Lion. "Put 'em up, Put 'em up!" It was one of his favorites, too.

Abbi, Jessi's older sister, never got a break. "You're the Scarecrow, Abbi!" Jessi would declare with authority. "If you only had a brain!" Then she would throw back her head and laugh uproariously.

People who know our family story might be thinking that I was a shoo-in for Auntie Em whose known for her kindness & care for others. But nooooo ... whenever I asked WHO I got to be in this adventure Jessi would always cackle "I'll get you my pretty. And your little dog, too!" as she cast me as the Icky Ole Witch.

You see, Jessi struggled with words and sounds at that time in life. She couldn't say "wicked". Her best effort always brought forth ICKY.

So Icky I was. Icky I am. Icky I will always be. It is going to be my grandmother name one day, too.

It's a reminder of who we are as a family and all the milestones, challenges & accomplishments we have lived through together.

You see, that insensitive educator looked me in the eye and told me I should just accept the fact that Jessica "would never" be able to communicate effectively, learn things or function in the world on her own.

I chose not to believe her. As a family, we chose to always believe in Jessica.

Today Jessica is a beautiful strong woman of faith. She has lived in her own apartment. Jessi gets up and goes to a workshop where she is treated as a valued employee and co-worker. She has been in a relationship with her boyfriend for over 10 years with hopes of marriage one day. Jessi sings in front of audiences. She reads, writes, counts and has an amazing capacity for puzzling and figuring things out.

Jessi is the happiest girl!

Oddly, Jessi never opted for me or Abbi to play the part of Glenda The Good Witch. Even though I do have a fondness for bubbles ... and wands ... and miracles. I like to think that really I am Miss Piggy ... who gets to play ALL of the witches in The Muppets Wizard of Oz!

So there you have it. If Icky is ... as Icky does ... then I must be doing something right!