I am still a fragile woman

Centuries upon centuries women have fought to be seen as strong,independent,and equal am I considered a failure since I lack in some or maybe all of these departments.I want my life to be surrounded by love and happiness it has involuntarily become my life's mission to be submerged in love,but not because I want means I will receive.Let's begin, I find myself grown yet still misunderstood by many,my words when said often come out like I'm being feisty definitely not what want.They say for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction...in my case they hurt,what can I say I'm not as strong as I pretend to be. I emit this energy of love and positivity to the point people even strangers tend to release their troubles on me ; I don't have a problem listening to anyone's problems I am just desperate for someone to hear mine.Inside this woman's body is a scared little girl wanting to hold on to the tiniest piece of hope. Daily I brainstorm ways of making my life better reaping only failure no transport,no money,no friends, no companion just my drive to be happy. I don't worry too much for material things of this world I just fear for the safety of that scared little girl crying out for help inside because every time her heartbreaks or she's struck by heavy punches of words the light that shun so bright in eyes dim even more with time.I am a fragile woman tired of hiding the way I feel,scared someone will come to rip the bandage of the open scars before it gets time to heal. No I wish to be strong but weak in the arms of another.I wish to be independent of all the pain I have nurtured inside.I wish to be equal in emotions balancing the scales of love,joy and complete happiness before it's time to dig a grave 6ft under where my ashes will be laid to rest.I DONT WANT TO BE A FRAGILE WOMAN.