Finding Yourself

Every story begins somewhere in the middle. My story goes back a little.

Let me start with I had a great childhood. I was protected, loved, spoiled when possible. Too spoiled actually. I loved learning. So I was left to my learning, never having to do a chore. Life was great.

I had plans to be an Archaeologist since I wasn't 4 and a half, but somewhere in my junior year of highschool I got scared to leave my family and friends to move across country alone. So I dropped out.

Life wasn't bad, not great either. See I was the good girl. I didn't cuss, I got straight A's and B's. I said my first cuss word at 18.

The "Obsession" had been realizing its ugly head for years. See I never partied. I had no fantastical stories to tell. My mom had more than I. My younger brother had more.

At 22 I had my daughter. Became depressed. I had started smoking pot at 21. At 23 I found others.

I found the needle at 27. From start to finish I ran 8 years hard. I ended up in jail for one week. Thats All I needed.

I hit my knees and began talking to Jesus again. He answered. my mom, dad, brother and husband all went to prison for a year.

God sent a message through a bondswoman. She said for some unknown reason she didn't believe I needed to be with the rest. She bonded me out I had 5 charges, she charged me for the lowest one.

I had to go to a program for a year. I learned how to really except myself. I learned to forgive myself, because Jesus shed his blood for me, just as He did for all of you.

I forgave others for doing me wrong. Not for them but for me. See as an addict, carrying around resentments five you and excuse to use.

So we use. It's like drinking poison waiting for another to die. Only its you your killing. Its you that suffered.

Letting it all go and knowing that God formed you. He said you are a master piece. Jesus doesn't make mistakes. If you weren't supposed to be here, you wouldn't be here.

God creates beauty from the ashes. If you let him. I thought my life was a waste. God had a different plan.

I get to help others see their inner beauty, strength, and courage.

We must freely and openly admit our faults. Look for our part in every situation. Quit pointing fingers. Be honest.

It's a freeing feeling.

I'm not perfect. No one is.

Treat others the way you want to be treated regardless of how they act.