Walking away from bad decisions

in breakups •  5 years ago 

Break-ups I guess are one of the hardest challenges in life one has to face. The most recent break-up that I had was with someone I had shared intimate moments with for the first time in my life, ever. Of course, I will not jump into that decision without seeing the good in the person and the situation.

Before I met this guy, I felt that I was living my best - local travels every here and there, lots of self-care. Just simply enjoying life as what it is. I explored a couple of regions in my homeland for less than year.

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Mango Plantation, Guimaras Island - Dec 2018

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Tinuy-an Falls, Surigao Del Norte - Nov 2018

It was good life. With all the travels, shopping and sight-seeing, I felt that there was nothing more that I could ask for. When I was still with him, I thought of sharing all these good time adventures with him. I was looking forward to travel with him, visit interactive museums, and watch cultural shows. All plain fun.

But Luke is a travelling businessman. Travelling is part of his work routine. When he is here in the Philippines, he does business 90% of the time. In his usual 10-day business trip, he would only spend a day or two with me. And given that he is in a 3-week travel tether all over South-East Asia, Luke is tired. I felt that he does not have time to travel and explore with me. At once, I thought of joining him in his business trips but when he is travelling for work, he does very little side trips after the conferences. I felt that I will just be a distraction if I come and join him.

This was a hard set-up which lead to the break-up. It still hurts like hell to date. I guess, the worst part is knowing that the man with whom I first spent intimate moments with, never loved me. And will never learn to do so. It breaks my heart.


But there is no point to look back at it anymore. It is time to move-on. I am on my own now again. Restart my life. And rekindle my old self which I once had lost.

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