Like any good second submission - this story only makes sense because of chronology. So, as with any other sequence of events, its really only a matter of time that makes this relevant...
This past weekend I paid someone to hypnotize me!
And while I do think hypnotize is kind of a strong word for it, I enjoyed the treatment none the less. It was more of a guided meditation that anything else, and while I did find it kind of cheesy at times, it also found it rather enjoyable.
Most notable was the exercise where I was asked to think of a time when I felt happy, comfortable and confident before traumatic events happened, and then a time afterward where I felt happy and safe. So there I was with my eyes closed, asked to envision those moments as if I were watching them on a movie screen. Breathe in and remember the time before the trauma, breathe out and remember the time after, and repeat. Slowly I began to make the connection that the time in between the two events could eventually be erased (or at least temporarily removed) from memory.
Memories are a funny thing after all. Somehow there are all these little moments that stick out to you, like they are somehow more important than others, when its really only fair to claim that all time is created equal. {After all, each minute of every hour has just as much potential to be life altering, or equivocally disappointing, as the next} But somehow, it feels like there are some minutes that matter more than others.
Yet, there are all these mundane detail that stick out more than others. Feelings of frustration or boredom or embarrassment that get lodged in your psyche, as if you are somehow destined to relive those moments forever.
Why is it human nature to think of things you'd rather forget than be reminded that every moment is simply a new opportunity to do just that?
Its August 21st and there was a new moon solar eclipse that had the whole country buzzing and I've got this intention on my mind: Time to start fresh. I will treat this day as it deserves to be treated - like it is new, it is exciting and it is not shaped by past events. And if things start to seem overwhelming... Well that just means its time for a rewrite.