Let me tell you a story of the nameless and faceless bullies. They are all around us!
When I was eight, I was chosen to represent my school in a macmillan quiz! Two things struck me there! The drama and the dance presentations even more than the quiz itself.
When I was nine, I enrolled in a tutorial alongside a few other kids so as to prepare for the entrance exam into Queens College, Yaba.
And I saw a familiar face! One of the dancers at the macmillan quiz. Oh boy! I was so excited.
She was walking with a friend when I greeted her with a smile one day while going to class with my mum and she didn’t answer me. Her friend told her “Look, your friend is greeting you” and she replied “God forbid, that poor girl will never be my friend”.
I heard her and my mom did too. Anyway, that passed.
I grew up to be a brilliant (and some might say sophisticated) young lady. But even that became a problem.
Where I am from, you shouldn’t be sophisticated!
If you speak your native language, the educated ones will say you’re uncouth! The not so educated ones will look at you with such incredulity like you’re not supposed to know your language.
If you speak English, they’ll let you know that you’re fake.
You can’t walk the way you want, unless you’re carrying airs.
You can’t eat what you want if not, you’re a pretender.
You have to become an introvert because if you walk on the streets, guys will try to ask you out and then insult you when you politely decline. Some of them will even try to hit you on your body because you don’t look or act like one of them. Taunts are thrown at you by people who you have never even met before and who you probably won’t recognize two minutes later.
The bad thing was that these people were everywhere and in every cycle of life and you can’t seem to shake them off.
When I was in secondary school, I tried to act like them and gain their acceptance but for every word I said or step I took to be like them, I lost a part of myself until I didn’t know who I was anymore!
I was walking on the street today and someone hit me on my head in the midst of a group of guys and they started throwing shades again.
And I continued walking.
No I don’t want to be like them. I don’t even want to be around these nameless and faceless bullies anymore. But what can a woman do?!
I know that no matter where I am or what cycle I belong to, there will always be bullies but I refuse to bow to the pressure! And neither should you.
Neither should you!
