Welcome dear readers and my friends!
Today I would like to discuss with you one issue on which I have been thinking for more than 1 day. The situation is as follows. I have already written that for many years I have been friends with women who live outside my homeland, Russia.
They are married to foreign husbands and we are all from different countries. Someone lives in Germany, France, Canada, USA, Norway, Sweden, Italy, like me.
We all know each other virtually and with some women who have become my friends in real life, we meet in Moscow. We order dinner in one of the restaurants in Moscow and communicate, communicate, telling each other our news from our lives.
I love my girlfriends. It was an introduction to help you better understand what will be discussed. And now for 2 days we are discussing the history of our young girl, who is not yet 30 years old. It is Russian, but illegally went to live in Turkey.
Her position is illegal, but she has an adult male patron, older than her years at least 25. She is pleased that he allows her to live the way she wants. It may or may not work. At the moment she expressed a desire to work. Its zaboronok completely insignificant, just enough for the fare.
But she doesn't care, because she lives on the full support of this Turkish man. He has his own family, even grandchildren. I perfectly understand that it is pleasant to this adult man to have the mistress-the young woman is 2 times younger than him.
But why does she like this situation: the illegality of being in a foreign country and dependence on men? Unwillingness to organize your life. She does not want to make a work visa in Turkey, because it is necessary to collect documents, it is difficult and tedious.
He can't meet a young man because he has a patron. In my opinion lives like the amoeba, which do not want to. I don't want to make my life, be responsible for it.
There is only one desire at the moment it is to get married and have a child. Although currently writes, that perhaps the child she did not want to.
How could that be? In my opinion young women and men at the present time what is infantile to grow. Very few young guys who know exactly what they want in life.
I haven't written anything to this girl yet. I don't want to be very direct, but I don't like her mood. Quite. I can't advise her to stay in Turkey. I can advise you to return to Russia and start working.
A lot, not sparing myself. And be very responsible for your life. Not to think that only a man can make her happy. She has to make herself happy.
Your opinion is very important to me. What would you advise this girl?
All of you have a good day and roses from me!
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thank you so much
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excelente post
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thanks
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thank you very much @kryptoniabot and @kryptonia for your support
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That's a tough situation, it's so frustrating to know what's almost certainly best for her but she doesn't seem to get it. I imagine she's very comfortable in her position, it'd be very hard to give up. (I guess I shouldn't guess on if the patron's family knows of her...)
As for advice, I think you said it already, being too dependent on another person hurts growth in yourself. But growth needs struggle and struggle isn't fun, and if she finds documentation too tedious, she has a long way to go... Government documentation is super annoying but it's very important, she should go with the law of the land she's in to start with, it'd save her pain later on, probably
(kryptonia: motordrive)
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@motodrive, I thank you so much for your detailed response and your opinion. You understood the situation very well. And in principle agree with my point of view. I also believe that young women should be responsible for their lives. Not to date married men, not to destroy someone else's family. In any case, it will only harm all participants in this story.
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