Interesting, I quit my last job because I was miserable, but here I am a year later looking for work because the money ran out. Since then, all the effort I put in to improve my mental, physical, and emotional health makes working at a job not seem all that bad anymore. I realized it was me allowing misery to take hold (and sometimes even seeking it out). I don't want to work for someone the rest of my life, but I know I can build my projects on the side while I raise some capital and deflect all water cooler talk in the meantime. Good luck, maing!
RE: I didn’t get the job
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I didn’t get the job
Wow, we are really in the same position. I also see working as a chance to test my growth, to see how much I've changed these past 5 years. You are amazing to have done it in 1 year...or perhaps I was just so damn messed up!
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Thanks! But I'm by no means healthy, I'm just healthier than I've ever been. This is going to be a lifelong process. I catch myself falling into spirals and immediately pull myself out before I fall too far, as with anything you get better with practice. A big part of the process was literally resetting everything. No drugs, no junk food, full sleep, exercise daily, no distractions or bad habits, and searching patiently with what I was left with, which was me. Center myself then ask the tough questions like wtf do I want to do with my time, why are my reactions so irrational, why do I do the things I do, etc. It's almost like fapping before making relationship decisions. From there you identify your values and subsequent identity and build off of a platform of truth, YOUR truth. It's probably the hardest thing I've ever done, but I'm so glad I took the time off.
The last bits of it for me are meditation and mindfulness, I suck at both, but again need to practice to focus on living in the moment and enjoying the journey, not so much ignoring what's important to reach some arbitrary goal.
I hope you find inner peace, I commend you on all the progress you made, it's no easy feat.
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