The Safety Of A Child Should Be Number One....

in childprotection •  6 years ago 

I haven't been on steemit for 4 days due to a situation that I have had to deal with, and this has made it hard for me to think about anything else.

My oldest daughter who is 12 has a friend who is also 12 that has been repeatedly raped by her brother for the past 4 months.

I am not a naive person and in the world we live in I can believe this does happen behind closed doors, but to have it happen to someone we know so close to home it is heartbreaking.

On Monday morning I had a phone call from another little girl's mother who is ten to tell me about this scary and emotional situation.

It turns out that the girl who was getting abused had confided in my daughter as she felt like she couldn't tell anyone about what was going on.

My daughter was sworn to not tell any adults and this has been a rough time for her and we have noticed a change in her behaviour.

My daughters friend broke down while at school and the kind hearted person that my kid is went to see if she was alright.

Her friend told her that her brother had been forcing her into sex acts with him and she wanted it to stop, she carried on to tell my kid that it had been happening since she started comprehensive school back in September. (she was 11 at the time)

The boy is nearly 16 and is due to leave school in a few months.

When I heard the news I needed to speak with my daughter to find out if what I was hearing was true, because whispers between many different people can alter the truth some what.

At 3pm on Monday I picked my daughter up and took her home to talk to with my wife, this was a heartbreaking time for us all as she told us that she was unable at the time when she was told to do anything as the little girl who it was happening too would be hurt.

She told us that he would make it into a game, and once her mum walked in to find them both with their bottoms off after intercourse, the little boy told their mum that it was a game and the mum bought it.

My daughter was told not to tell any adult, but cleverly she told another girl who can't keep a secret from her mum and my kid knew this and this was her way for people to find out.

We contacted the police, and they told us that they were to busy to send anyone out to the house where the kid was staying.

Another mum of another kid we know went to the girls house and brought her back to hers out of the way until someone could see her, after 4 hours the mum of the girl wanted her daughter back and this is when things got a little crazy.

About ten minutes of the girl going home social services went to her house with 2 police officers and asked questions about what had been said.

They left without the girl as both children said that this never happened and my daughter was lying about it all.

Social services haven't dropped the case but I feel like leaving that girl under the roof of the abuser is ridiculous as this keeps her in danger.

When my daughter had heard that the little boy hadn't been charged or taken away into care she was scared then for her safety as she goes to the same school as the boy.

Me and my wife made the decision to keep my daughter off school until we knew that she would be safe from this boy.

School hadn't even been contacted by the services about the situation, it was only when my wife told them what had happened did they know anything, and this is when they put safeguarding in place for my daughter.

She now gets taken too and from school in the school car, she has someone who walks to class with her and has a buddy to make sure that she is alright.

What makes me mad is that the girl who this has happened to wanted this too stop and had a moment were she could have spoken out. but instead they call my daughter a lier and this has put my daughter in a place where she doesn't want to be.

I know fear is a bad thing as this girl is probably scared to tell the truth, but from the detail that my daughter has told me and my wife she really needs to step up and get it out.

My daughter can't even say the word sex and spells it out as she get upset when she speaks like that, this is just a situation that I never thought that I would be in.

@artonmysleeve

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Such a sad post to read and I hope your daughter is dealing with this burden. As for the poor child who's been the victim of this abuse by her own brother, I pray she gets the support she desperately needs. Having a daughter myself this post makes me want to cry and rage but as usual these kind of situation leave us all feeling absolutely powerless. God know why someone would do this to a child, never mind their own sister, and I have not one bit of guilt wishing that this boy gets the shit kicked out of him. Maybe this behaviour runs in the family, as that is the usual source, or maybe he's just viewed some screwed up pornography giving him a warped idea of sex. Either way it offers little to the victim or the possible future victims her brother may target. Castration would be my second and more lenient choice of action here.

when the lady phoned me I thought that she said it was happening to my daughter, I went and got my flick knife while talking to her and I was planning for 10 to 15 years of porridge, lucky for him and all involved my daughter wasn't abused.
We have a meeting with social services for my daughter to put her case forward for her friend, (ex friend now)
I feel it for her as she is made out to be a liar, and this isn't the case, before she even went to comp she would get flustered and look away from the tv when people kiss. she isn't interest in sex and then for this to be dropped on her shoulders it makes me want to take her and wrap her in cotton wool.

Lucky for me and my family we have a good support network and we can deal with this and come out strong.

I just hope the little girl in question doesn't go through any more of this while living with her brother, because he is still there and so is she.

makes me sick to think that they are under the same roof.

I'm not a big fan of social workers as they usually have overloaded work schedules and also have their hands tied by lack of physical evidence which usually leads them to having to find ways of closing their cases by falsifying facts. In your daughters case I guess it's harmless for them to be involved but as you can see they have left the other girl in harms way as they can't force issues or read minds. It's a terrible situation and I imagine the boy involved will probably be threatening his young sister to cover his own back. You just have to pray that someone in the loop takes charge and sorts the situation out as quick as possible.
Glad to hear you have your daughters back, these young girls are growing up in a very different world to what we did.

It is a scary world mate, I have her back 1 million %.
I believe her as I always know when she is lying and there is none of her tells that suggest that she is.
The details that she has given to us is shocking, and it upsets her to think about it.
We are not talking to her about it until the day she is questioned as we want her to be happy as she as already told us everything that we need to know.
She is a kid and needs to be able to enjoy her little life just like all kids should.
At the minute we are spending a little bit of time together and she likes that, when she is ready to open up more she will.

I don't like today's world as it is just full of events that when I was a kid was either unheard of or untalked about.
I hope that this girl gets the help she needs, I hope the boy gets the punishment that he deserves.

I hope that his friends find out and it isolates him from the world as he doesn't even deserve a life after ruining his sisters like he has.

just my thoughts.

Agreed completely my friend, you sound like you have a great handle on things and your daughter is fortunate to have a dad like you.

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