My internal intellectual conflict.

The prism through which I view my life is one of internal conflict and strife. On the one hand, I conduct constant objective analyses on vast swathes of data in order to develop accurate conclusions about the realities of my own personal existence, but on the other hand, I also hold emotional, subjective, and fleeting hopes and dreams with regard to the direction of my life.

Although the former conclusions are objective and accurate, the latter emotional feelings are not, and are almost always positive. These two ways of seeing the world are diametrically opposed, but even so, each continues to seek to dominate my perspective, leading to an internal intellectual conflict, a neurosis if you will. Of course, if you were to analyze the number of times I have been proven right in my optimism, you would of course see that the positivity with which I am filled is wholly unfounded and unsubstantiated, but even so, I believe that I shall always be plagued by positive, and optimistic thinking, because the power of the emotional and subjective is almost always greater and more all encompassing than that of the detached and objective.

It is strange to experience the level of internal neurosis I do on a daily basis. I suppose that my baseless positive and emotional self will continue to clash with my introspective, scrutinizing and objective self, for the foreseeable future at least. But I am also sure that one day, one perspective will win out, and I look forward to finding out which one!