Conspiracy Theories

An informal poll: what do y'all think about conspiracy theories in general? I'm not real big on them, but I know a lot of them because I am a denizen of the internet, after all, plus I have friends who are real into that kinda thing. But there's a difference between the plausible ones and the WTF ones, at least in my eyes. I generally categorize conspiracies into three groups:

Plausible

Whether or not I believe the particular theory, these are the ones that are possible. They exist within the realm of known physics, it's no secret that our governments/corporations/organizations/etc. are super corrupt and have committed horrid atrocities both historically and in the now, and there's a logical reason for it, that is, it passes The First Test Of A Conspiracy Theory: asking who benefits. Is some rich fucker getting richer? Is somebody getting power and privilege? It can't just be because "they're eeeeeeevil!!" ...which brings us to category #2:

Hiding Bigotry Behind A Conspiracy Theory

You may or may not be surprised how often I see this and the person insists that they are not a bigot. And I have seen these against pretty much every damn demographic of people on the planet. They're usually pretty out there, but then that leads us to category #3:

Step Away From The Acid

These are the ones that make your head hurt and possibly require you to be a certain level of fucked up to appreciate. There is no logic, there is no reason, there is some Twilight Zone marathon while on magic mushrooms creativity to it, but not much else. It astounds me when people believe these who are stone cold sober. Anything that defies physics is aliens. Or time travel. Or I don't know, I'm not on LSD right now.

I'm not even going to tell you which theories I think are plausible and which I think were invented while on the 9,874th viewing of The Wall timed with the album whilst at Burning Man on their third day with no sleep and enough meth in their system to make them Heisenberg's bitch back in the 90s. I don't want to lose friends here. 😉 I'm just curious what kind of criteria you use when presented with a new theory. Do you use the "who benefits" rule? What else? The "wouldn't be surprised if evidence of that ends up in a Wikileaks dump one day" rule? 😁 Let me know in the comments!

PS I'm not looking to be convinced of one theory or another, I've seen some really compelling evidence and some really not compelling "evidence" of various ones. If you believe in one I think is cracked, no worries, you do you. But if you're a bigot, well, fuck you, read a book. Meet people. Stop being a dick. But for everyone's consideration, I submit this comic (haha):

GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY! 😂

That Red Fish your momma always warned you about

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