Epiphany - Enlightenment. Epic and... FML.

9/14/2018

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This is my story; my Path; my struggles; My experiences. Life is a Journey. It's more about the sights and experiences along the way than the destination.

Included in this narrative will be the philosophies, books, articles, movies, quotes, music (and whatever else I attract) to explain Life, The Universe and Everything.

It will morph and mutate based on new data; whether from individuals interacting, #LoA or new experiences altering current conceptions...

It's going to be an experiment in Morphological posting. I dunno if that's a thing, but it's my universe you're helping me define it.

This entire post will change daily as I refine and redefine it based on experiments and experience. I'll be realizing and recognizing new realities (and evolving better ways to express and tie them in).

It will be well polished and perfect eventually, but for now: Chaos and Butterflies...

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I promise it will prove interesting and worth the ride -regardless!

The narrative will continue to morph and be refined (along with the prose) as my OCD demands work and rework; Refine and redesign.

Our understandings continually change; so too will this post; and same is true with me.

Change is the only constant - it keep us moving forward - chaos is the engine. Apathy and Entropy are our ultimate enemies - too soon to get into that, though!

The Universe sends signs. It's up to us to notice and define them!

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My conundrum:

Do I push forward, or just enjoy my steak while selling my soul -sending my faith and dreams down the drain for the almighty dollar? How would scotch and cigars taste when I tell my daughter to never give up on her dreams if I give up mine?

9/16/
Asked and Answered :

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=net.appbeta.deepwebmobile

4:44 am I wake up and this is in my notifications.

God is great. The universe is amazing gotta have faith and LOOK for signs.

Deep Web
32 Proven Ways to Make Money Fast

Read it from :

https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/298348

Monday's going to be a busy day! I can't wait to see which one of these works best. I'm going to ask those closest to me to see what they think while I assess on my own. Shotgun Approach - to narrow down the options and find a fit.

A couple of years ago I walked away from an extremely lucrative career and company I created because I was disillusioned with systemic corruption in the industry, government and humanity in general. I abandoned a big chunk of my personal prison - the Macroverse of my career which had hit a brick wall - systemic, endemic corruption. Corrupt from the highest levels of government, all the way down to homeopathic, snake oil salesmen.

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Money and power were never my ultimate goals. They coincided a lot with my dreams, and there was infinite potential with them in my pocket, but success came despite soul crushing issues and core principles being violated... Also, money and power are fun, intoxicating and addictive.

I started to focus on my family in the Microverse while I researched and subconsciously sought answers to the big questions. (42 is pretty legit)

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Anywho, I figured out my universe: We create our own. It's a massive, interlocked mendala of interlacing souls and their experiences. Someone exists in my universe to mathematically prove it. I have the theory (it's ridiculously simple and elegant at the same time) I'm not a hundred percent certain how to express it, yet. - So yeah, there's that, too.

I am learning. I tried too hard to find and express my theories on my first attempt. Now its threatening my everything.

I'll figure it out. I will save my family and finances will follow faith and His plan.

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I selfishly I walked away - went Galt; took a massive leap of Faith and didn't tell anyone. I figured it'd just work out - like walking off a Kroger Grocery store, floor (Head Clerk) shift without a college degree into the lowest wrung spot of a Brain & Spine surgical team - I did that, but this was more difficult.

OCD, DID, ADD and an Eidetic memory will eventually drive you insane... I'm crazy, but insanity is just around the corner - I just spent a month in Jail because I scared the shit outta my family with my burning obsession. I broke through and had an epiphany. I was following up with a catharsis when I took a detour.

It started out with an intimate understanding of infinity that came to me when I was chatting with a friend...Socratic style.

So-Crates - whatta dick.

I tried to put it in some semblance of order, the below notes were originally written 4 or 5 years ago and edited in my mind and mutating here on this post for more clarity - though it will remain incomplete "TBC"until we get to the end of this journey. I need help fleshing it out, so we need to go a li'l slow!

INFINITY?

What comes to mind when you think think of the universe ? Most theories agree it's infinite. Time is different though. It's a human construct to help us deal with the day to day. We measure it based on a unique set of circumstances to our planet... Infinity is such an easy word to say and we think we understand what it means... The concept is not so easy... In fact if you really delve into the meaning of infinity your mind will shy away and you just say infinity. Infinity literally means if you can conceptualize it, it exists. Every single possible permutation is not only possible it's a reality somewhere. Even more bizarre: when you remove time from the equation, every single possible reality or thing you can think of exists "NOW" we're immersed in a metaverse soup. I picture an hourglass ⏳ the point in the middle allows 1 grain of sand to pass through at a time - that's our event horizon - choice points...

So... What's that mean to us on our own personal scale? And why is it meaningful? Because every single possible iteration of your existence has happened. Everything that you can think of in your life that's happened happening or will happen is out there... There is no impossibility...only a lack of awareness. Time and awareness comprise our path through the ether of Is - Quiddity.

Quidditity is the essence of change:

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Our sense of self or consciousness (id) in this mass of energetic and creative goo is extremely powerful. All realities we can imagine are irrelevant if we aren't there to realize them.So when the Bible says we are created in God's image, it's literal. We mold and form energy to match our observations.

Divinely delivered association?
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/298348

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Of course we're not omniscient or omnipotent (consciously) in our existence or experience, but our subconscious, or soul certainly is...on a quantum level.

Boiling all that gobble gook down into a useful philosophy is relatively simple and there are lots of different examples and proofs out there that reinforce such a conclusion. If you visualize a result and believe in that result you can change your experience and realize that reality. Every horrible thing you can imagine happening to you has already happened. Every amazing thing and epic results have already happened. Which of those we experience depends on what we can conceive, visualize and by accepting current timeline reality while filling in the details we can experience anything.

Think about science class proving a theory When you set up a blind, why do you set up a blind? Because of the observation effect... The inexplicable (lol #LoA) event that occurs when we watch and expect a result we see a significant statistical bias towards that result. For example a coin flipping machine flips a coin exactly the same way 10 k times. Some poor sap sits there and watches it every time and thinks and visualizes tails the tallied results will have a slight but measurable bias in the favor of tails. We realize the reality we're looking for.

----I stopped there... - - - -

I'm going to fill in more blanks eventually, but first,

@Sim427 is my Twitter. I have the key to my universe - probably yours, too. When we prove the theory, you will see your door.

If you go to my Twitter TL you will probably find it yourself. One day I'll figure out how to extract and archive the feed and weave the posts into this morphing storyline...

Twitter is where I have my biggest online presence, most research, most confidence and close to 50k tweets including most of my online reading for 8 years.

Rightwingnews.com, now RWN.com was my previous haunt and you can find my older arguments, posts and debates all through the comments sections. I posted under Simulacre for years... Refining my troll-fu as I battled - daily - in the realms of ideology, politics, religion and science. I owe John Hawkins a debt I doubt I'll ever be able to repay for providing me with a home and shelter with like-minded individuals fed up with narratives pushed by TPTB.

In both venues, you can see my replies; my fights with inner demons given life through tweets, arguments, debates, trolling, devil's advocacy general dickery and all around Fuckery.

My catharsis is captured on Twitter when I told a strange anonymous individual I loved him. I realized he he couldn't have challenged me more if I had created him for the sole purpose of to challenging me! He personified my Devil's advocate. I loved him in a flash, because he made me see me. His entire purpose [in my perceived] universe was fulfilled in a second. I was forced to Reconcile the fact that it was me seeing myself in another individual amidst a bitter partisan battle on opposing sides of the debate. Epiphany. Love thy neighbor (regardless of their enmity).

My muse explained Nietzsche a bit more to me. I get the concept, now - though I've only read his work peripherally. Once my prejudice was removed, I could understand his concept.

I have the key to our salvation. You have the key to my salvation. I understand that philosophy, now. Our narratives must merge to fix the planet.

Bonus features are:
God's on our side.
We're all creations and creators. Regardless of how evil a person, there is a path to God.

Love thy enemy is literal. Your greatest enemy is necessary to answer your biggest questions about yourself.

Your greatest enemy is an extrapolation of your first experience with sin.

You created a reality with your first cognitive experience. You codified the experience in a meme.

Our reality is defined by memes.

When your soul Encounters sin, it must plumb the depths and soar the heights to discover how a new meme affects the system.

Not difficult for me with millions of pages of data and an eidetic memory.

Different story for a virgin born soul. A pure soul is a new God ready to write a page in God's compendium - connected with love, inherently aware of The Secret ("The Secret" by Rhonda Byrne. http://a.co/3pY1qDd) pure in its existence - quarantined from evil and negativity...

That's not this universal experience, yet - unfortunately. We can get there, we will get there. In the end, we win.

TBC...

9/15/2018 @ 0800

The Practice Effect

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Practice_Effect

The Practice Effect: A Novel (Bantam Spectra Book) https://www.amazon.com/dp/055326981X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_zZqNBbH8GW6PK

This post is going to evolve as I figure out how best to tell my story and communicate the crazy beautiful universe I've envisioned and encapsulated into my grokked philosophy...Its already started evolving when I read through this morning!

Some Auties are going to have a field day going through this sifting for changes... I'd track it, but that sounds too much like work! #awetism #AutismAwareness

The Way is all I'm willing to label my conclusion. It's unique to each and every individual (or collective entity.

One of my favorite contributors, David Brin, influenced me early on in life. His novel "The Practice Effect" is phenomenal and you should definitely read it, believe in it and start practicing - ASAP!

Bottom line, though... I'm going to continue to add to this post instead of creating new entries. My formats and styles are going to change a lot - I'm sure. I will continue to practice it out, and we'll see what happens!

Soooo... If I'm doing something you feel could be done better, please let me know and I will modify and mutate like a meme - for that's what I am - Me.me - In the beginning, there was The Word.

Good, Better, Best

Good, better, best. Never let it rest. 'Til your good is better and your better is best.

-St. Jerome

My apologies to LeBron for bursting his bubble... He coined this quote like Al Gore (ManBearPig - Super Serial) claimed credit the Internet. Saint Jerome beatcha by a coupla thousand years, James - Hell, My Auntie Jo beat you by a few decades! #TheMoreYouKnow...

https://www.brainyquote.com/citation/quotes/st_jerome_389605

Coffee an Cigarettes...
Check out Black Coffee (Album Version) by Sarah Vaughan on Amazon Music
https://music.amazon.com/albums/B004RKN182?trackAsin=B004RKN1TQ&ref=dm_sh_it79KCoriYQSgB2VtaRdgWPGe

Humming along to this song I've never heard before - ironically watching hummingbirds flit about; flying and fighting as I enjoy my morning coffee and a cigarette...

JOHN ASSARAF: Our job as humans is to hold on to the thoughts of what we want, make it absolutely clear in our minds what we want, and from that we start to invoke one of the greatest laws in the Universe, and that’s the law of attraction. You become what you think about most, but you also attract what you think about most. #lawofattraction

Hold it in your mind; Hold it in your heart; Hold it in your hand.

-Caveats:

Like improv entertainment, you must accept the current reality (warts n all) to be successful in this endeavor.
The reality you envision must be aligned with The Plan, The Way and be true to yourself and your creator.

Polonius:
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell, my blessing season this in thee!
-Shakespeare - or whoever was claiming the Shakespearian mantle at the time...

My Dad read this! Hooray!
Ready, Player One:
(he's called me Squirt, forever... Literally.

My response...

My old computer did not even have a 5.25 floppy drive... It used cassette, data tapes. I later got a Commodor 64, but couldn't figure out how to interface with the tape drive... I released those first creations back into the ether and started fresh!

My uncle is on the journey with me, now too!

Thank you for taking the time to continue the journey with me. It means everything.

I will keep your axiom in mind: don't quit a job until you have another opportunity nailed down.

Alternatively stated:
A bird in hand is worth two in the bush.

It's better to be certain of a small thing than to hold onto the possibility of something greater and end up with nothing.

I understand this logic. My certainty was a war chest worth of savings that would last a year - minimum (including all worst case scenarios). Enough irons in the fire to supplement and stretch longer as necessary and my mind and God's plan to cover the rest. I thought I had all bases covered...Of course there's always Murphy tossing wrenches! Chaos theory is the engine that forces change. Gotta roll with that too.

I appreciate that, and I know that I am the only one I can trust implicitly to help myself. I was tossed for a bit, but I'm recovering and will survive and thrive again. There is no other acceptable outcome other than getting better and improving on what I have built.

I can control myself and my behavior. I can change myself into whatever I need to be to survive and I can always fix myself. I am responsible for my actions and my decisions. I take others feelings into account and my core philosophy remains to be a Man For Others (as I was taught through my Father, Religion and Jesuit education)

I am a bit different than the norm, too. I always have contingency plans and plans for (if/when) those to fail as well. I'm obsessive compulsive and I never stop thinking and figuring.

I'm a visionary in that I envision solutions while walking in everyone else's shoes. What would Jesus do? What would I do? What would I do if I were you? Improv and Improve - accept the current situation (warts, short comings, and all) aaaaaand "Go!"

My entire life and existence has been an exercise in troubleshooting, logistics and making the impossible a new and better reality.

Getting arrested for losing my temper and saying mean things was WAY outside of what I thought possible. I never in a million years saw that coming. It shocked the shit out of me and rocked me to my core. Regardless of the intentions of loved ones, I should have done the math. I could have followed the logic train with enough due diligence and logical extrapolation. I paid a steep price for unintended consequences, my oversight and failed accountability vectored me off into a near disastrous outcome. My failure to predict that outcome led to painful lessons. I must do better.

The road to Hell is paved with the best intentions...I need to have better contingency plans and more variable consideration when Chaotic Murphy's Law comes to play Monkey Wrench surprise party.

Here's the worst case scenario!
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heroes_in_Hell

I read this series in the late '80s. I remember amazing afternoons with my Grandparents (especially, "My Ozzie" Grandpa Oz) going to the used book store and drinking in the endless arrays of fantastical worlds encapsulated and contained in over stuffed stacks and racks-spilling off of the shelves and piled up in their genre specific nooks and crannies...

The smells of bookstores still brings back powerful, positive reminiscences. Thank the Universe, thank God for the creation of His image of a creator in all of us.

https://steemit.com/art/@saarinout/justin-main-part-i-a01860699504c

"No artist tolerates reality."
-- Friedrich Nietzsche --

That quote is so perfect and so true. The creators in all of us rebel against a reality devoid of the magic of Love. Dogmatic, tribal groupthink is anathema to the human spirit and is as far from God's plan as one can possibly get.

I'm going to spend some serious time exploring Nietzsche. I keep seeing quotes from him and find myself nodding and agreeing.

I like this site and use it to acquaint myself with authors. I think of it as as my shotgun approach in getting to know them.

https://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/1938.Friedrich_Nietzsche

More, soon - gotta do some microcosm work.

Signs, signs errewhere there're Signs!!!

First, the apps that have been working overtime for me the past few days:

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.hemul.android.runar

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.ionicframework.tarot371308

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I'll fill in the blanks later today. This is relevant to the experience, though:

Aaaaaand finally, as I was posting the scriptures this happened:

Screenshot_20180916-052655_Amazon Music.jpg

Check out Hallelujah (Piano & Cello Version) by Sound Healing Center on Amazon Music
https://music.amazon.com/albums/B071P3NV11?trackAsin=B071FBK4MH&ref=dm_sh_S0EJTIgPt8SzcMdzvGjUkObVd

Hallelujah!
Amen.

9/16/2018
Thoughtful Mind has been amazing for me. It's always relevant and fun to figure out the who, what, where, why, when and how.

http://www.thoughtful-mind.com/index.php

Today:

“Truth is, I'll never know all there is to know about you just as you will never know all there is to know about me. Humans are by nature too complicated to be understood fully. So, we can choose either to approach our fellow human beings with suspicion or to approach them with an open mind, a dash of optimism and a great deal of candour.”

― Tom Hanks

Today's Raw take... Closing 9/16/2018

Conversing with a loved one:
(-- is me)
-I definitely recommend a strict diet of supplements.
I'm going to just lay it on you and you take from it what you will. As they say you can't push a rope but I can try to motivate and guide you or navigate you through building your body correctly and strong without hurting yourself doing it. Most people exercise incorrectly or overtrain I know these things from experience unfortunately.

-I used to wear long underwear under my jeans because I was so skinny and layer two or three T-shirts. Karen son Brandon same thing.

--Me too

-we don't want is you to put on a ton of calories and not turn it into muscle and yes zero body fat is very unhealthy.

--exactly why I'm asking you! You tried before (Mom's house - 1999), but I wasn't ready to make any changes - it was not my priority at the time.

-You need some fat in case you get sick ha ha I didn't know how that sounded till I said it but let's see if you got the flu not a good time for you to get it or any other thing evening A cold

--I used an Echinacea regiment (2 pills 3x / day for 90 days) in 1998 and again in 2003 combined with positive thinking / Law of Attraction I stay healthy - practically immune to colds. Flu is rare and I have had a few bouts with it, so point taken!

-I went to GNC and bought him a jug of the The Nella weight gain — put two scoops in water and get a cup that has a mixing wire in it; refrigerate for a short time. Drink the whole thing in between meals.
Do this two times a day that will add 1500 cal of nutritional type stuff.

--OK. I will give it a shot!

Read the jog (?) ingredients. I believe it includes iodine which is very important and people neglect.

-At Costco they have a protein from vegetables and Koke (?) mixture very very low in sugar because of the Coco and high in protein. When you stack on these calories carbohydrates the body need protein
The muscle will build from this protein so do two scoops and one of those a day.

--I'm not sure what you mean here.

-We don't want to just make your belly fat.

--Exactly!!! I want healthy and tasty as possible!

-This will build your shoulders back core legs arms with a little bit of muscle over a long period of time and it will slowly build up keeping the body fat down.

--I've been working to rehabilitate my right shoulder for a long time. I injured it in 1993 and ignored it until it got so bad that I was basically incapacitated 3 years ago. I do a ton of stretching and foam weights in the pool. I could use feedback on types of stretches, exercises, etc - I'm sure I could find a more effective way with modifications and tweaking.

-Does your mother have an exercise ball? Does she have any rubber stretch bands that provide resistance usually green yellow purple?

--I can check.

-I wish I had one and do this when I was young because I was always trying to get on a bench press but this is so much better balancing on a ball on your back and using dumbbells doing sit ups from the ball and using the stretch bands.

--I have been laying flat on a pool noodle (balancing, legs crossed) and doing crunches and pushing weights under water. Isometric core exercises and muscle confusion. It feels effective and is very low impact - I don't get sore and was seeing great results before the jail experience

-I will send you examples of how but you need to go get that stuff right away. Also start a log I know you do a lot of writing but a exercise log with scales.

--OK... I think I need a little more clarification, but am definitely interested and will incorporate something like that into my daily plan.

-We will set some goals and it will be good on your psyche to see progress.

--I'm a big believer in goals, these days!

It'll also be good to look back on remember when I was that weight or that skinny. Basically a starting point. This could be a very good thing for you Sean.

--That's how I feel, too. It's the only way I can look at it. Nots tie us up in knots. Positivity starts with your language patterns. Your language defines your thoughts. Your thoughts define your attitude and forms your reality.

-I think you should quit smoking right away. That is so toxic and you have the ability to Quit.

--agreed. I broke it down before 8/25 and my conclusion was I smoke (now) because that was the only time Ashley and I had alone together. It was our quality time before she started living in romance novels, escaping reality.

-Anyway I'm picking up poop next-door and then taking my Bonita to the park or mountains. I am in a lot of pain but I work through It.

--Sounds like a good plan to address the pain. Especially if you train your brain to MAKE it therapy with healthiness as the goal and whatever you're doing is the process to get there.

-I've seen hell I've held things to my head that I'm not proud of sat in a dark closet but I didn't pull the trigger.

--I've been there, too. You're not alone.

-I have spent years with the ringing so loud that I felt like I was back in that closet.

--I understand this too. "Grok" is a better term:
Grok is a word coined by American writer Robert A. Heinlein for his 1961 science fiction novel Stranger in a Strange Land. While the Oxford English Dictionary summarizes the meaning of grok as "to understand intuitively or by empathy, to establish rapport with" and "to empathize or communicate sympathetically; also, to experience enjoyment", Heinlein's concept is far more nuanced...

-I still pray to Jesus and I believe the Holy Spirit God Jesus
Had and has other plans for me.

--I agree.

-I take care of Ozzi and feel very good about myself. Almost narcissistic.

--Ok this is a problem I can help with!!
You take care of Ozzie and feel good about it Full Stop

You're taking care of another human. You're exemplifying God's will. You should feel fucking awesome about that and revel in that good feeling! You are allowed to be proud! When you're attuned and in line with the Golden Rule you deserve to feel amazing. Do not doubt that. Do not allow any guilt to enter your mind when you are doing the right thing.
This is the prayer I use to keep me in line with the Golden Rule:

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is Hatred, let me sow Love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is Doubt, Faith;
Where there is Despair, Hope;
Where there is Darkness, Light;
Where there is Sadness, Joy.

-Do you think you can control your OCD and do some research on these domains?

--I use my OCD (it's a terrible thing to waste) it's gotten me into brain and spine surgery - pretty amazing!
Send me whatever you've got and I'll work on it on Tuesday. I'm putting it on my task list now.

-Do you have any interest? If you don't I understand but this is an opportunity.

--I'm not sure... I am looking at everything again, so once I reexamine it on Tuesday, I'll let you know.

-I am not afraid to ask for help either. I am asking you
To help me with one of your investments.

--understood. I jumped in, because I thought it would help you. I'll check it out and see if I can add value, though. Monday is dedicated to analyzing the 32 proven crunch time earnings https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/298348

-Maybe we can make this pay off and I don't mean just to get rich I'm talking about to handle our responsibilities as fathers and husbands and ourselves.

--I gotta plan. It came at 04:44 this morning I told you it would happen. Check your texts it was a pretty amazing, moment. Faith works. Perhaps your domain gig is part of the plan and will work in there too. We'll see!

-Now days all we hear is take care of yourself first after a lifetime of training to serve others first. I get confused. Self neglect. If the burnt toast
Feed everybody but don't eat myself except for as I'm cooking it and what's left over I eat as I'm cleaning the dishes. I wonder where I learned this crazy cleaning fetish obsession neuroses I don't kno

--I have a very good grasp on this. My Father is an expert! My education and experience have helped flesh out the rest. Whenever we talk, I'll share what I've learned.

The micro affects the macro. Gotta take care of yourself, then those closest to you, then worry about the rest.

I have a feeling that you have a false impression of my state of mind - especially my mental health. That's ok. Just keep an open mind and we can help each other out.

What Happens When You Open Your Third Eye

Good information to update later

Read it from :
http://deep8information.com/share/1489.html

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