Being the next in line can be hard, specially when my dad runs the largest international non-profit businesses in the entire world.

in creative-writing •  8 years ago 

My dad runs a toy-factory offshore of Norway, very close to the North Pole in a village that we just call "the village". The best way to travel to the village is either by boat in the summer, which is between July 5th and July 18th or by scooter, rain-deer, skies or if you can afford it - a chartered plane.

My dad works a lot, and back when I was young, he had a lot of workers but over the years most of the factory has been automated and production has also decreased a lot.

One time when my dad was on a business-trip abroad, he got in trouble with the police as he had got stuck in a chimney that had been sealed in the bottom. He managed to get out thanks to the local fire-department, and after spending two months in jail and paying a heavy fine for destroying the chimney and the walls, he came back to the village and decided to retire and is now calling me every day to talk.

So here is my dilemma - my dad obviously wants me to be running things now that he has become old and more grumpy, the only problem is that I don´t really believe in his business-model of working every day all year around only to airdrop everything to the six-seven real nice people left in the world.

I mean - it just don´t make sense to me anymore.

Back when great grandpa ran the business, they distributed all over the world using their patented good karma/bad karma detector and their patented reversal biological gravity which create a vortex that makes it possible to travel in the airspace in tick-speed while maintaining super-position... or to simplify it, they made a device which made it possible to be at thousands of addresses at the same time for a finite amount of time and then you would travel to another thousands of other addresses simultaneously in one tick, which is ... like a second to travel from new york to japan for example, or from anywhere to anywhere... Anyways..

So, the original business-model was to distribute everything to nice people based on the instruments mentioned above, but over the years there has been an insane decrease in nice people, and we get angry letters from all over the world every single day all year complaining about us being scammers for not delivering their gifts, and if we could afford all the stamps we would reply back and say: "You have not been nice, that is why your package did not appear under your pine-tree in your living-room".

So what should we do?

Start distributing gifts to naughty or all people unconditionally has been up to debate, what do you think? Keep sending gifts only to nice people, send gifts to only naughty people or just shut down and say we had a few hundred great years?


What do you think we should do?

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dude, play that footage in slow motion - it is a video - nobody was physically injured or even close to an injury. The dog just gave a sound and she did a performance kick in the air :)

Say Hi to Mrs. Claus @fyrstikken lol

Haha good stuff Fyrstikken. I think I might have seen your dad when I was younger... But don't remember that clearly, did he used to wear a lot of red?

Hey man, hats off to your Dad! And it's rare that I uncover my bald spot :)

Someone told me your dad doesnt exist. Finally, i have photographic evidence to go with the cookie crumbs and empty glass of milk

Only there is a possible option, allows that your father should retire, liberates to the reindeers, Take a Harley Dadvinson, paint her of red and use her to distribute the toys, break all the machines that do the gifts automatically and return to contract persons.
and logically the gift are for the good children and those who help the nearby persons (as me xD).

Please, give this message to your father.

Dear Santa Claus, This year I have behaved very well, please remember that I go 10 years waiting for my game of trains, this that has lights and does very much noise, If you do not bring it .. I will say to you, that now I have your photo, I know how is your son and where do you live.

With love @amartinezque

Upvoted for your dads Beard.

Tell your dad his 6 White Boomers are resting in the back paddock waiting for his Australian run. Too hot down here for reindeer in December

For those readers not from the great land Down Under here is a YouTube clip of the Australian Christmas Carol Six White Boomers.

Nice story! And what sort of toys?

Buy some shitcoins and he can airdrop them to all the children of the world. Maybe one of them will take off!

Go the route of the Tooth Fairy... Start leaving inspirational notes and not gifts/money. The business will leave you, and choice made

follow voice of your heart :)

I say stick it to the nice people.

Nice. Very cute story!

Do it For the Children....... U gotta make a list, and check it twice....

He looks like Santa Claus.

@fyrstikken Send letters and gifts in the future on the "Nice" blockchain to the nice people nicely connected to the "Nice" blockchain. To save costs encrypt gifts and let everyone try to figure out how to decrypt them!

Santa Claus look alike.

oh, you are santa claus son jajajaj, your father inspires respect

The Beard is tradition too i guess :)

Set up a blockchain Santa-fyrstikken-coin with smart-contract. Distributing gifts will be easier!

Fyrstikken coin to the rescue! Lol

Have you thought about outsourcing? Maybe have the parents deal with this stuff for you. Let them determine if they are good or not, but keep the dream alive. Just a thought.

@fyrstikken Daddy Looks Like Santa Claus


UPVOTES n Support as always

Start distributing gifts to naughty or all people unconditionally has been up to debate, what do you think?

Well, times do change and your poor old dad is facing competition that he and his ancestors never faced before. I humbly suggest that he either wind up the family non-profit business or launch and antitrust lawsuit that names as defendants every national government of the First World!

Collusion! Destructive Competition! Undercutting! Predatory gifting practices!

:D