There is nothing wrong with bar-tending and your life isn't in a mess from what I read. Just think about all the interesting social encounters that could walk through the door and how you may have impacted people's lives just by being an ear to listen or speaking a few words to them.

There is nothing degrading about being a bartender, and you don't have to go to college to have a wonderful life. Perhaps with the money issue you just stepped out of your means because you weren't happy where you were at. When at 49 years old (I am 25) you should know that wealth is not measured in money or social status.

Just think and consider for a moment about all those lives you have affected. You are a potion master and the spirits you serve can help or hinder a person all depending on their perceptions upon consuming.

Have you ever considered that maybe right here is just where I need to be?

Enjoy your life and don't worry about it so much.

Best wishes to the young Gaia.