A Flat Earther's Rough Guide To Winning A Nobel Prize - Tackling The Sun Problem

If you are a flat-earther, then you are probably frustrated at the lack of appreciation for your observations about the world we live in. You can't understand how everyone else; save for a few enlightened ones, can't see what is staring them blatantly in the face.

Well I believe I can help with that, I may be just a poor deluded glober, whose mind is as closed as the doors were to his old classrooms. However, I do have a knack when it comes to giving advice, and dare I say it, am quite the logical and practical thinker.

On top of this, I am a bastion for scientific discovery, and thus I believe that I do have some insight as to exactly how you can convince everyone the world is flat, and at the same time win a Nobel Prize!

The Sun Problem

A clearly photoshopped image of the sun going 'down'

As a flat-earther, it must irk you that every time you proffer your very reasonable assumptions about the earth. That the first thing people come back to you with is; that would mean it is daytime everywhere on earth at once, and we'd get all sorts of weird shadows on the moon as the sun passed underneath us at night.

Then of course you have to patiently explain how the sun is not circa 93,000,000 miles from earth, but is actually only 32,000 miles away; and is in fact a lot smaller than those slippery bastards at NASA claim it to be.

You then have to go through tiresome explanations about the spotlight effect, just waiting for the inevitable question;

Yes, but why then do we see a sunset and sunrise on the horizon, that clearly shows the sun coming from underneath the horizon?

To which you answer; because perspective.

Why aren't people OK with this!?

Proving The Distance

So it seems to me, that if you could prove that the sun is only 32,000 miles away, you would not only prove a major part of the flat-earth conspiracy theory hypothesis, you would also win a Nobel Prize.

Ah but how do you go about proving it without the help of those deceitful swines at NASA, or their ridiculous shills like Elon Musk?

Well the answer to that, lays in how those NASASSholes proved the sun is 93,000,000 miles away. You see they use this (clearly made up) mathematics called trigonometry. Apparently there is a way you can gauge how far something is away from you without actually having to travel there; it has something to do with using two different measuring points, and then measuring the angle between those points and the distant object, or some such bunkum.

Those NASA stooges (and every other mathematician on earth), say that the theory can be proved because you can use the method to measure an object(s) of which you already know the distance. Repeat it over and over again, and you can be sure your methods are sound.

This throws up a fantastic opportunity for you! It means that there are two, yes two ways you can win a Nobel Prize.

The first, is to prove, by demonstration that the method for measuring far away distances is flawed, by simply using the method yourself over and over again, meticulously writing down every single step you take, then publishing the results.

Voila! Nobel Prize.

Number Two, you show exactly how the figure of 32,000 miles distance, came about for the moon, because I'm sure that distance wasn't just chosen because it happened to fit the model. I'm sure it was worked out scientifically.

Ergo, all you have to do, is show the scientific community what to replace trigonometry with... Hmm, I'm sensing three Nobel Prizes here:

One for proving that the method used to measure distant objects is fatally flawed.

One for replacing the entire discipline of trigonometry with whatever you decide to call the new math.

Lastly you'll get one for using the new math to prove the distance of the sun from the earth.

Bingo!

Get To It!

OK, there you go, you now have the blueprint to win multiple Nobel Prizes, and prove the first part of the flat-earth hypothesis.

The best thing about this is, apart from having to momentarily pollute your mind with glober knowledge as you learn the distance measuring method, you don't actually have to know any physics or mathematics for two simple reasons.

Firstly, you'll be working with the new math which I'm sure is widely available within the flat-earth community. Secondly, if they can get the distance of the sun from the earth (and of course its size) so badly wrong; maths and physics are obviously all a load of complete and utter rubbish.

Further reading:(glober science)

Measuring Distance By Parallax Method - experimentation - Centre for Science and Mathematics Education, Utrecht University (The Netherlands) (probably NASA shills)

How Do We Measure The Distances To Things In Space - Starchild question - Warning: NASA shill site! - Links contained to non-NASA (but probably still shill) sites.
Eratosthenes - Wiki - Man who worked out circumference of earth circa 2000 years ago - The first NASA shill.
Astronomical Unit - Wiki - More baloney science from NASA shills Edwin Hubble, Albert Einstein, et al.

I HOPE THIS HAS HELPED! I INTEND TO PUBLISH SOME MORE OF THESE GUIDES AS THIS IS A MEGA IMPORTANT ISSUE THAT THE REST OF US EITHER CAN'T OR DON'T WANT TO SEE!

PLEASE ACCEPT MY HUMBLE GIFT TO YOU, THIS WILL HELP YOU PROVE ONCE AND FOR ALL THE TRUTH ABOUT OUR PLANET. MY ONLY WISH, IS THAT YOU REMEMBER ME IN YOUR NOBEL PRIZE ACCEPTANCE SPEECH.

Your eternally ignorant glober-friend

Cryptogee