Thick thighs and small butts

A while back my night was made better by a woman by the name of, well, we will just call her Jane. Our first night meeting each other was spent talking about the good and bad about life so far, what we learned from it and how to bounce back. We just couldnt stop going back and forth, even during the smoke breaks of our continuous drinking.
She was fond of the jack and coke while i mixed my beers with shots of tequilla. After a good 2 hours of just talking i offered to grab a late night meal with me at this local pizzeria. When we enter the shop, we both couldnt help but be aggravated with the long line that must have been like 20 people.
Without even hesitation she offered to make eggs and no promise was made but even microwaving popcorn for a movie. Of course, this just seemed to be my night so why not enjoy the company of a beautiful woman instead of the lonely sleep that has been acustomed to. The entire walk back to her place is met with confusion and nervousness as i debate what my move should be right now. Do i try to hold her hand? Should i stop staring at her chest? Am i going to end up cooking the eggs?
As most of you guys know, assuming you have lived with your girlfriends....they are slobs. So before she even had to tell me "im sorry, its kind of a mess" the picture of towels everywhere and dishes loaded in the sink were in my mind. We go inside and remove our coats to get comfy on the couch! She turns on the TV and comedy cenrtal is still on and one of my favorite episodes of "the office" is playing. While she changes into a pj like outfit i get semi invested in it.
click i hear the turn of the stovetop knob turn on and at this moment i prepare myself for compliments on what would be a hard to screw up meal. Now fed, i offer my lady a joint to smoke so we can unwind properly. She casually strolls through netflix as i prepare to spark it.
About halfway through the joint she starts complaining about this back pain she was having... Of course, naturaly instincts came in and i jumped all over the opportunity for a rub down. She climbed on top of my lap and sat comfortably on me so i could get the whole exposure of her back. Periodically i slid her body around so i could add pressure to different spots and casually start going down to her lower back.
Between pauses of the rubdown she starts saying that the reason why she might have these back problems is because she has a small butt but her thighs are big. Claiming thats a rediculous claim i positioned her where i could graba full piece of each ass cheek and replied "nah, thats crazy talk". As they say...ill leave the rest of the story to youe imagination!