Single Parenthood/Coping with a absentee parent.

in deadbeat •  7 years ago 

Ever walk into a court room, owing 150.00 dollars, and leaving owing over 19 thousand dollars to your child?
I have witnessed this myself. The person who ends up owing this amount, gets angry. Gets livid. Tells you off. Calls you names. Threatens you. Says stuff like "I am going to do something you won't expect I'll do.." Calls a child who they barely know (due to their OWN decisions, and walk of life...) a "bratty ass", for voicing their opinion....

Have you ever had someone tell you "The kid isn't mine", and say to the world that you slept with everyone in a small town? Just to have that theory blown right out of the water with a 700 dollar DNA test?

Have you ever had someone who paid more attention to someone else's kids, than their own -right in front of their face? Who couldn't be arsed to get out of their truck, to give their own child a hug? Who couldn't be bothered to tell their kid that they LOVE them... (because we ALL know he doesn't love her... )

Have you ever had a non-custodial parent, call the parenting parent, a slut, whore greedy c u next tuesday? All because the courts made them legally financially responsible for their child? Who they hadn't paid for, in 14 years?

Have you ever had someone berate you, call you down to everyone they can think of? Have that person's family and friends call you names, because they "feel like it"...

Have you ever held your child at night, when they cry - asking why "daddy doesn't love me?"... and ask me why that person hates them as much as they seem to?

Have you ever had someone go "F you, i'm not paying a dime. So and so can just adopt her, I never wanted her. She was the result of a bad lay and a broken condom" (I have screen shots of this...)

Have you ever had to constantly deal with government programs, to force the non-custodial parent to pay anything toward the 16,150 (well, it's technically 19k, but the court messed up the order. )dollars in child support that they owe? To make sure your child gets what they deserve?

Have you ever had to worry each day, if that money will ever show up? If the non-custodial parent would finally be responsible for who they brought into the world?

Have you ever had the second ex-wife of the dna donor, play nice, act friendly, stalk you on Facebook? Just to screen cap shit play both sides, and show him what I have posted. (which, I kind of played into, and CAUGHT her doing..block, delete move on...)

Have you?

I have, and it sucks. My daughter has a deadbeat father/dna donor. We've tried. We have tried EVERY darn thing to make him a fixture in her life. He just doesn't bother. His way of dealing with this? Blocking his daughter, calling me a whore - and thinking ignoring the "problem" will make it go away.

It's not going away.
Today I found out the Maintenance Enforcement is seeking garnishment. All because he cannot "man up" and just pay the 358 per month, that he's ORDERED to pay. With his own evidence.

So, yes. It's a struggle. I do the best I can for my kids. People don't realize how much shit is dumped on the shoulders of a Single Parent. We cope. We make do. If and when we get this from the Deadbeat, it will go in an interest bearing account for her.

She's worth it.

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Anyone who says someone slept with everyone in town publicly is a total douche canoe.

He said much, much worse than that.