Embracing Destiny #DearDiary

It's a beautiful Monday morning on my side. Happy New Month and seasonal greetings... Too early? Oh well. Blame my beaming cheeks as my soul keeps busting to a million smiles. This can be because I am experiencing the after-effects of overwhelming gratitude. The simple joy of knowing my young are healthy and fine just sleeping in.

I wasn't so sure two months ago. Imagine a decade of not knowing how exactly your own child is. The anxiety that comes with the unending worry of what if something wrong was happening to them. I know what that is.

My Kenyan tea is sitting on my left to cool off. I love it at a certain temperature and my cup is currently too hot. So I am typing away on this keyboard trying to keep you here long enough to come up with some fairly good content. Kindly indulge me, I need to share a few experiences.

Yesterday I had one of the most beautiful Sundays of my life in a very very long time. I spent my afternoon roaming a mall close by and it felt like something like something out of this world.

Our way home...

Yes, I have been to that mall a million times... But it was my first time to do it with all of my children. My eldest two just came home after a long tortuous decade and it was extra awesome to do everything with all of them together. I am in the process of creating what will be my most memorable memories yet.

Is ain't amazing? Getting a second chance in being a mother again. Getting the time to correct some many mistakes made in the past. It's more like a rebirth for me. Something like giving birth again to your own children without the pain this time.

I am getting ready for the Wednesday morning talk too which is making me a bit nervous. And I feel like it's allowed. After all, I am going to speak at the UN offices on behalf of many youths. Let's agree that's a little bit too much for a girl of my simplicity.

Agreed? Moving on...

I can tell you for free that it is very easy for someone or anyone to experience joy and crippling pressure at the same time. The pressure to adjust to turning into being a teenage hands-on mum overnight and the ability to meet the just escalated financial budget is huge. I have no room for major mistakes as time is running out by the second and I can't fail as the stakes of losing them again are so high.

Fucked up, right?

I am all about wounds and scars.
No boundaries with the stars
I am a bleeding moon
Defying dark clouds doom
To shine on a silent night
Watching as lovers fight.

Life is this unpredictable and unstable course that I have over time learned that it has sharp curves, cliffs, smooth roads, and numerous blind spots. If anyone told me I'd be going through fulfillment and uncertainty like I am today, I'd have told them that it's impossible. But here I am experiencing the impossible and learning that anything is possible... It is how we respond to it that categorizes the experience as a good or bad experience.

Landscapers small businesses along the highway...

What's going on in your life?

Thank you for coming!

Also shared on my Whaleshares