I've seen so many articles out lately about "body-shaming" of women that are clearly overweight. It's not body shaming!
There's a clear difference between being curvy and just being fat/obese and unhealthy. Wanna know some of the main differences?
A truly curvy women will have no excess belly weight, her body will be thick BUT it'll also be toned, tight skinned, firm but slightly giggly in that sexy strong way.
A truly fat chick will pretty much be the complete opposite. Sorry ladies but excess skin, belly fat, thigh fat...you're fat.
And here's why I can say this..I. Am. Fat.
And I'm also going to say this. Being fat makes some not usually attractive to most males or even some females. Sorry ladies.
I in no way expect a man to be ok with my weight beyond fucking me. cause most men want o be seen with a MINIMUM of a decent looking woman. I know at my current weight and size I do not deserve that.
But, randomly, I find myself with a man. A wonderful Chinese-American man who accepts my weight. BUT he's also admitted it does make him less than willing to show me off on his social media because he's pulled some really hot women. And he himself is a hot man. Was I hurt by that? Yes. But not because it was mean. It's because if the roles were reversed, I'd be the same way. When you look you, you want your partner there with you.
Here's the thing, though. I'd bet so many people will get angry at this. Go ahead. It's your issue. Not mine. I accept reality. I accept how men think and feel on this subject. The men who are with fat girls usually have a fetish. The rest I CHEER for not following norms the rest can't avoid. Mine has to the point I can respect.
But none of this has gotten to me in the way you'd think. It's motivation to be the hot chick I wanna be and was before colitis and nearly dying a couple times ruined my body inside and out. Sad part is, I'm know I'll need upwards of $10K for skin removal at this point to be decent to myself. No clue if I'll ever get that kinda money though so...I'll always be fat even if I get fit with other ways.
Oh well...I hate being me.
Everything in life starts with acceptance. Even though if you yourself AND your boyfriend consider yourself as fat, you should never be ashamed about it. It is you! And you is you!
If you are not happy with it, that is oke..you can work on that. But nevee be ashamed or yourself.
I come from a caribbean island where skin is accepted. Is it healthy-> no. But these ladies wear it with so much pride that 'flat' people could take an example out of this!
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Excellent words. I couldn't have said much better.
Lydia, you know this post started with shaming and you also shaming yourself. I get that by your own words you hate being you. So I'm only going to say that my advice is start there, forget about the body issues and start with the loving issues. Betting people will get angry at this is not helping anyone, least you. Neither is hurting yourself to live up to other peoples standards.
I'm happy you've found a new relationship with another. Now let's see if you can find a better relationship with yourself. Much love Lydia, you always know where my inbox is and you know I'm only ever going to share you the truth of what I see, with love. Take care xo
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It sounds to me you are frustrated and are looking for a quick fix in life. Let me tell you that overall wellness is not a quick fix! If you are looking for motivation then you are not going to get it by just THINKING it. You need to have an actual plan and DO it. It is actually not hard, you are just not going to see instant results. Start with a gradual change, cut out bread and carbs, then go to the gym! If you spent as much thought out in what you did in the blog I am sure results would come in. You identified your source of unhappiness, only you can take control of that!
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