The face of depression

The face of depression...I love this photo because I captured an emotion here that I would always hide. This photo was taken in spring 2017. I was living in a friends house in the centre of lisbon, doing what I love. In every sense, I should have been happy. But i was miserable. It felt like i was stumbling at every step, and I could only seem to focus on what i wasn't. I didnt trust myself, and i didn't trust any of my decisions. I was desperately self medicating, binge watching self help videos, healthy eating, not drinking/smoking or taking drugs, nothing was working! It took just one humble moment for me to set down my pride and finally ask for the help that i needed. Help to reshape my personality that had turned against itself.

Now over a year later and I am a totally different man. I still have problems, but for the longest time in my life, i haven't hated myself. And the trust, along with my life, that had worn so thin, is beginning to rebuild.

I'm saying this because i know some of you are suffering similarly to how i was. I can see it in photos, or in the tone of posts. (It takes one to know one) Just 30 minutes or less to search for a reputable psychotherapist and book an appointment. 30 minutes to change the direction of your life. If you find that you are hating yourself, its because there is a crossed wire in your brain caused by a trauma, or in my case light knocks along the way that mounted up and worsened as i got older because i didn't have the tools to deal with them.

My friends and family have been so understanding through this period of my life, I continuously reach new levels of love for them and myself.

There is no shame in taking care of yourself