David Lynch Teaches Typing is probably not the best way to learn to type, but it is fun and very weird

starters: if you’re a child and you don’t yet know how to use a keyboard, why are you familiar with the oeuvre of David Lynch? You’re not ready! I’m 24 years old and I’m not ready. That’s why I’ve seen only two episodes of Twin Peaks and 30 minutes of Blue Velvet, which I turned off because I was too unnerved to continue. (I don’t even think I’m out of line with that one. It’s so disturbing!) For children, there are many ways to learn how to type and most of them involve nice things like skateboards and astronauts.

If you’re an adult and you’ve not yet learned to type, you’ve still spent enough time watching TV and listening to boring dinner conversations about tweets to have a brain fractured beyond repair — which will make it hard for you to sit through a glacially slow tutorial punctuated by moments of disorienting surrealism.

For example:

But you may have fun playing David Lynch Teaches Typing if you are a fan of David Lynch. I did read the David Foster Wallace essay about him once, which contains this remarkable anecdote: