_{Let's see how this works. Mixing Drugwars with thoughts about a comic strip.}

Itchy Feet

www.itchyfeetcomic.com
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I have a good friend from Argentina and we get along really well. I tell everyone that I'm a people hater and I tend to keep everyone at least an arms length away from me, unless we have known each other for few years. A decade or two. Actually, I feel we (the Argentinian and I) get along much better than I get along with some Finns that say they like people and who act like extroverts. Well, there are extroverts and then there are "extroverts". And there are people persons and there are "people persons". Warm people and "warm" people.

The comic strip thou, it's really accurate. _{Is that what they call a face hugger?}That's how I feel when anyone who I don't know that well comes and hugs me. A Finn or an Argentinian. I do hug back, I'm not an idiot, but the inner me just stands there paralyzed and thinks how freakishly close we are to each other, too close for rational thinking, so all main activity in the brain must be shut down immediately so that a major meltdown of the core is avoided.

Also I feel that the hugger sucks all my energy and after every hug from a stranger I have to have a recovery time. Depending on the situation and the hugger, 5 minutes or 5 hours.

But as I said, there are different types of extroverts, people persons and warm people. I consider myself to be a warm person, although my appearance at first may be cold and reserved. I never rush to hug a stranger. Or a person that I know of, but don't know that well.

Of course it depends on the situation, but the words never in my life, aren't that far when thinking about hugging anyone blindly around me. Also touching people on their shoulder, back, hand or (for goodness sake not in my life!) leg are a big no-no for me. I do not want people groping me, then why should I be all handsy on others?

There are exceptions of course. Greeting someone with more than a handshake if I feel for some reason a handshake is too formal or too cold. Comforting a stranger if needed. And the people I know well. I save most of my hugs for them.

I do not throw around words like darling, dear, sweet, honey, sugar or sweetie. But that's not entirely because of the introvert in me. That's also because I mostly talk Finnish and in Finnish language those words just aren't usually said to strangers. Most of them not even to friends. Only to family, loved ones or to little children. So when I speak English, that reflects on there too. Strangers are never dear to me, unless I'm writing a letter to them. Couldn't get myself to say darling to anyone when I have been in England, although several strangers spoke that word to me. And, I think, if I had used called strangers darlings, people would have thought that it's weird coming from my mouth.

Defining myself with a shorter sentence, I'm a person that is warm from inside out.

The worst experiences have always been with people who are the exact opposite. At first very warm, but then again not that open with their thoughts and what they say because it feels like they are pretending to be warm and open, but really aren't for some reason. Perhaps they want to be people persons, but just can't do it all the way. Or perhaps they notice in the midst of being open and warm that it's not worth it with this particular person that they are interacting with, and decide to shut down. Or perhaps they are, to begin with, deceitful liars.

Either way, pretending to be a person who likes to be around others, want to hug and kiss and touch and be close to everyone all the time, does not work if you really aren't like that. It's better to be yourself.

Come ooooooon, do not look at me like that! I know you are out there. People like I am. Not that keen on rubbing yourself against strangers all the time. Although you are not a Finn. Or living in Finland and adjusted yourself to the personal space thing in order to survive in the cold Finland where you actually have to work hard to get people come close to you willingly.

It's like the walk-beside-me thing. Oh you don't know that? Perhaps you do, I'm just saying it weirdly.

It's the:

"Don't walk behind me;
I may not lead.
Don't walk in front of me;
I may not follow.
Just walk beside me and be my friend."
Albert Camus

Following or leading someone is easy. Being equal with them isn't.

Personal space and understanding how people are different and adjusting your own behavior accordingly.

Every cat owner understands this.

Oh boy, oh boy this turned out to be all serious and shit.

Oops! There. I revealed my army. But of course I now have a much bigger one because it's been 4 days.