If you have a television, radio, the internet, or eyes, I am sure you have seen a sign or slogan aimed at thwarting bullying.
Although they may seem cliche, silly and useless, I can tell you first hand that these positive messages are essential today. No I am not a bully and I don't think I am being bullied (by anyone except my 12 year old daughter... but she is just kidding... I think). But I do see the results of bullying every day.
I am a high school teacher of students with special needs. Luckily, my students seem to be some of the least bullied kids in our school. Even though the teens at my school may not be perfect, they seemed to have gotten the memo that it is really mean to bully a kid with special needs.
Unfortunately, sometimes it is impossible to see a person's needs. When someone becomes the victim of bullies, they automatically develop "special" needs. They need to be reassured that they are valued. They need to know they don't deserve the mistreatment. They need to know that it will stop and their lives will get better. They need to know there is hope.
Back in my day, we were all bullied... and we liked it!
I'm a crotchety old guy so I know what many people may be thinking. "Oh these snowflakes need to toughen up. Back in my day, bullies helped us build character. It made us tough."
But things aren't like they were when I was a kid. The bullying now is far more insidious. It is also constant. I bet if you took a poll and asked 100 teenagers if they would rather have their arm twisted behind their back until they say "uncle" or if they would rather have a never ending series of evil social media posts directed at them culminating in a bunch of little assholes writing "You should just kill yourself already"... 99 would take the temporary shoulder trauma. That pain goes away. It is not the last thing you see before you go to sleep and the first thing you see when you wake up. Trust me. It is freaking bad.
This is why the reminders to combat bullying must be just as constant.
Sometimes it sinks in.
Last week, the local junior high held their spirit days. Students were encouraged to wear pajamas, funny hats, dress like a "VSCO girl" (whateverthehell that is), meme day, and of course school colors day. It turns out that kids really aren't into spirit week they were back in the 80s.
Very few students took part. One young lady in particular showed up on meme day with a pair of Shrek ears (I guess it is a meme). When she looked around and saw that very few other kids were dressed for the day, she hid them in her bag. She did not want to risk being made fun of for daring to have a little fun (ironic isn't it?).
Later in the day, another girl entered the classroom wearing some kind of tinfoil contraption on her head. The students asked what she was doing. She happily replied, "I'm the Ender Dragon meme." Many of the classmates laughed and told her how lame she was for wearing something so ridiculous. Not wanting to give them the satisfaction of seeing her cry, the girl quietly, trudged to the bathroom. When she returned, the tinfoil contraption was nowhere to be seen.
That is of course until she noticed one of her friends beaming in the seat next to hers. While her pal was in the bathroom, this silly little imp had taken her Shrek ears out of her bag and defiantly placed them on her head. When their eyes met, Shrek gleefully asked, "Where's the Ender Dragon?"
The contraption was freed from the backpack and placed on its rightful spot on top of the fun-loving girl's head.
Then the two girls began to chat and laugh. None of the other kids said a thing.
Being an Upstander matters.
It also makes a geeky dad extremely proud.
the slogans as slogans i don't think they work if you haven't faced the real issue yourself or having a person close to you face it. Also, regarding the bullying in earlier age it usually comes from the parents, how they raised their children, if they abuse them etc etc
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Slogans are a strange thing. You never really know how they are affecting one's subconscious. Perhaps having them constantly around does have a positive effect when teh real situation arises. As far as the cause of bullying, it seems that even kids who have been raised correctly can give into the negative pressure around them. It really is quite sad.
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i agree, the first stimulus comes from the family environment , then friends and school and ofc from our own selves. We can't for example be 16 or 18 or 25 and bully others and blame our family and peer pressure for that. They need to "grow up"
As you said it's quite sad!
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In a way we did grow up tougher than today's kids but with the internet and stuff bullying is getting out of hand in many ways. I have a zero tollerance for bullying but some kids are also very sensitive and even a joke is seen as bullying. But yes I believe we all need to be upstanders
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I feel like the older generation also grew up in a different environment. With parents in the home with them. Today parents are too busy and their children is being raised by smartphones.
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I can't even imagine what it is like to be a kid now. When I was young, if I did something stupid, I did not have to worry that someone recorded it and posted it for the world to see (thank god). But now, you have to fear that someone will share your lowest moment with the world.
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I have 4 teenage children - there is so much information coming at them so fast from so many people that I think it is almost a relief to them when their phones get taken away so they don't have the constant social media feed into their brain.
And that's without bullying. With bullying, and the tendency of kids to pile on, it must be sheer hell.
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It's that piling on attitude that is most dangerous. And it is so easy on teh internet.
But wait... you have 4 teenagers?! Wow you are either the most patient person alive... or completely nuts!
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Sup Dork?!? Enjoy the Upvote!!! Keep up with the dorky content for more love!!!
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It's the only kind I have. ;)
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Now days its a new level of bulling, cruelty and children's evil. My nephew suddenly started to get lover grades and showing unwillingness to go to school. I really hope that he is not being bullied, but how one can know? :/
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It sounds like some possible warning signs there. I really hope your nephew is able to get some support to help him.
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