Eloise's story was heartbreaking, but for more interesting is what was not said... What brought her to the clearing in the first place? What happened to the final performance? The way she stopped short is absolutely tantalizing!
I love how you attribute so much power to song. Singing to animals, a song that will usher in paradise (how mysterious), a bard of repute seeking to change the world...
Lovely writing! I'm waiting with baited breath for chapter 4.
I had intended to make the time frame of her last performance more apparent. Should this get reworked I'll add that her last performance is happening the following day. The story still works as is, but you reminded me of something I missed.
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Oh I don't think that's necessarily something you missed, you can always contextulize it later with the performance itself.
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