All the latest Movieland investigations from detectives Dick japowski and Joey Arizona.
The Ape-rizona Case Files
MVP: Most Valuable Primate (2000)
A research chimp tries to make his way back to his nature reserve home following the sudden death of his handler, but he misses his stop, and winds up in the wrong town. He then gets befriended by a deaf girl struggling to fit in in her new school and her brother, who wants to be a big league Ice Hockey, if only his team could make an effort to win a game. Luckily Jack the chimp knows sign language...and his a master on the ice.
Not going to lie I anticipated this being terrible, but it was pleasantly surprising, it still wasn't great, but I would sit through it again. It's basically somewhere between The Mighty Ducks, a Hallmark Christmas movie, and The old PG Tips ads minus the cockney voiceovers.
First watch: 2.5 Doughnuts
The Arizona Case Files
The Rescuers (1977)
Two agents of the International Rescue Society go in search of a missing orphan, abducted by a ruthless business woman and her dim-witted partner, to help them recover a priceless gem Stone.
A much darker effort than Disney fans were used to back in the day, and one I wasn't fond of as a kid, despite the sequel being in my Disney top five.
Rewatch: 3 Doughnuts
The Arizona Case Files
Jason and the Argonauts (1963)
Jason assembles the best Greece has to offer and sets sail to find the mythical golden fleece, and use its power to bring prosperity to his future kingdom.
There are certain films you can't help but associate with certain times of year, Wizard of Oz at Christmas, Bond movies for Bank Holidays, and Jason and the Easternauts at Argo.
Rewatch: 5 Doughnuts
Dick Japowski's Ape-ril Ape-stravaganza!
King Kung Fu (1976)
When a karate loving gorilla beats up his master, he is shipped to America where he just wants to see the sights but people try to stop him so they also get beaten up!
Super low budget, man in a suit spoof of King Kong and martial art movies with the most annoying out of place soundtrack I've ever heard! Not great, but redeemed slightly with some fun sight gags.
First watch: 1.5 Bananas
The Many Views of Detective Dick Japowski
Blank Check (1994)
When young Preston is almost knocked off his bike the bad guy in a hurry hands him a... Blank check! Soon Preston lives out montage after montage of childhood wish fulfilment!
I promise I will get to the Mandolorian but at the moment Disney+ is giving me the opportunity to revisit some of my videoshop favourites.
This wears its Home Alone influences on its sleeve but that's what we wanted in 94, and it's what my children in 2020 wanted as well!
A fun revisit.
Rewatch: 3.5 Doughnuts
The Arizona Case
What If? a.k.a. The F Word (2013)
Daniel Radcliffe plays a medical dropout who falls for his best friend's cousin, the problem is she already has a boyfriend. What if...they could just friends?
Indie romcom that passes the time, but doesn't really leave a lasting impression. The highlight is probably Adam Driver's impulsive best friend.
The most interesting thing is writer Elan Mastai's first writing credit was the screenplay for...MVP 2: Most Vertical Primate.
First watch: 3 Doughnuts
Dick Japowski's Ape-ril Ape-stravaganza
Head (1968)
Keen to shake the image of being a squeaky clean boy band, The Monkees starred in this wacky and bizarre musical voyage into their psychedelic minds. Written by Jack Nicholson, this is endlessly inventive and funny and perfectly captures their moment in history.
Rewatch: 5 Bananas
The Arizona Case Files
The Return of Swamp Thing (1989)
Big, green and squishy returns to the big screen, once again taking on The Man from Del-Monte. With added romance thanks to a Del-Monte's wisecracking step-daughter.
The problem with the first movie was, despite having Wes Craven behind the camera, it was dull, not something you want from any film let alone a comicbook movie. That however has been counteracted in the sequel with generous helpings of humour and ridiculousness. Swamp Thing 2 is a bad movie...but brilliantly so.
Rewatch: 2.5 Doughnuts
Have you witnessed any of the Movies we've investigated? What movies have you investigated lately? Let us know in the comments below.
Funny you mention associating certain movies with certain times of the year. For me, I always associated Bond movies with Thanksgiving because here in the U.S., one of the channels always did a Bond marathon that four day weekend or maybe the whole week. Wizard of Oz, back when it was only shown once a year, was always shown in the Fall I think.
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BBC One always shows big movies on Christmas Day, and before the days of 80 TV Channels and streaming services that was a big deal. Which is why I personally associate Terminator 2 with Christmas.
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