All the latest Movieland investigations from detectives Dick Japowski and Joey Arizona.
The Arizona Spook Cases
Phantom of the Megaplex (2000)
At 17 Pete Riley is already assistant manager of the Megaplex, and tonight not only is the head honcho making a visit, the Megaplex is also hosting a Hollywood premiere. Unfortunately the urban legend of the phantom is proving to be much more than a scary story.
Boiled down this is a Scooby-Doo movie with out the budget for a talking dog, although they could get Mickey Rooney. The worst thing about Phantom of the Megaplex though is the kids keep referencing fake movies, and they're fake movies with titles that sound like they were made up by someone who has never seen a movie. Why wouldn't you just reference actual movies?
First watch: 2 Doughnuts
The Many Views of Detective Dick Japowski
Furry Vengeance (2010)
Brendan Fraser stars as a property developer who runs afowl of the local wildlife when he tries to build on their turf. More movies would benefit from a little more Brendan Fraser and it was a joy seeing him going toe to paw against the woodland critters. If your little critters are home alone fans they will most likely get a kick from seeing Fraser getting kicked, badgered, racooned and skunked for 90 minutes!
First watch: 3 Doughnuts
The Arizona Spook Files
Teen Wolf (1985)
Scott Howard plays basketball, lusts over a girl he can't have, he's your typical teenage, that is until he starts to go through some changes.
Full disclaimer: This is one of my all-time favourite films, easily in the top ten. Sure it has it's faults, like Styles having a problem with Scott being gay, but fine with him being a werewolf. You can gloss over that as an unfortunate hallmark of the time. But the one thing that's always bugged me; after his altercation with Mick at the dance Scott comes face to face with Mr Thorne, which makes sense he's a teacher at a school dance. But then Scott's dad comes round the corner and tells Thorne to leave his kid alone...but why was he even there? Has he just been roaming the halls? Waiting for his dramatic entrance. What is he doing there?
Rewatch: 5 Severed Heads
Getting Spooky with Dick Japowski
The Unnameable (1988)
A group of preppy college kids looking for a good time lose their minds and their heads when they encounter the indescribable horror of the unnameable..
It's a shame then that the poster gives away the creature! The first half you get alot of heavy breathing pov monster shots but when it reveals itself it really is an effective scare provider. I'd describe more but in doing so I might go insane..
First watch: 3 Jack O'Lanterns
The Arizona Spook Files
Nightmare City a.k.a. City of the Walking Dead (1980)
A reporter heads to the airport to interview a scientist. While there an unmarked plane lands without warning or invitation. The authorities surround it, "come out with your hands up" they. The doors open and out, out pour a horde of disfigured and murderous passengers. All hell breaks loose...Welcome to Nightmare City.
If I'd seen this when I was younger I think I would have appreciated it more, it's insane, violent, bloody and there's even a 'holy s***' moment where one of the undead crazies hacks of a women's breast. it's fairly relentless, but you also get over-saturated in insanity, there's not much in the way of actual story which meant I lost interest a couple times along the way.
First watch: 3 Severed Heads
The Arizona Spook Files
Hubie Halloween (2020)
Adam Sandler stretches his acting muscles playing a cowardly man child who loves Halloween, which makes absolutely no sense. He also puts on this mumbly voice that means half the time you don't know what he's actually saying.
There are a couple of good jokes in here, but largely it's the standard Sandler toliet gags and people being mean/stupid.
First watch: 1 Rotting Pumpkin
Getting Spooky with Dick Japowski
Encounters of the Spooky Kind (1980)
Sammo Hung stars as the unlucky guy who gets an incredibly funny but terrifying curse put on him. So with the help of a good sorcerer he must overcome the spooks and lift the curse.
An insane live action Looney Tunes type movie with amazing action and creative horror moments which has one of the best endings for your money. Highly recommended.
First watch: 4.5 Jack O'Lanterns
The Arizona Spook Files
Tales from the Crypt presents Bordello of Blood (1996)
An assistant to an evangelical preacher hires a disgraced private detective to find her wayward brother, who may have fallen prey to a horde of vampires.
This was a lot of fun, a wisecracking detective, Corey Feldman as a no good punk, sure it plays out like an elongated episode of Tales of the Crypt, but that's kind of the point. It's surprising how many similarities there are though to From Dusk till Dawn, which was released the same year. And apparently oversized nose studs are nineties shorthand for bad apple.
First watch: 4 Razorblade filled apples
Have you witnessed any of the movies we've investigated? What's the verdict? Let us know in the comments below.