Reviewing Movies I Don't Like: Every 'Fast & Furious'

in film •  7 years ago  (edited)

Fast and Furious.jpg

Heavily marketed actors with little talent, appalling minimal plot, appealing to the lowest common denominator within the world of cinema: the Fast & Furious franchise.

Before I continue, it's worth noting that the only one I do enjoy in the franchise is Tokyo Drift, given its more realistic nature, more interesting characters, and lack of bald men fighting to the throne to masculinity. Tokyo Drift was actually about cars and car culture.

There's something incredibly boring about seeing the same few characters to the same few things over and over, while screaming about the importance of their little family; there's no depth to these movies, and it's certainly no longer about cars and car culture. I'd go as far to claim that it is no longer about the characters themselves: it is about the actors and their friendship.

That would be good, if at least the characters were not invincible, and if the actors were actually interesting and not just these marketing tools for large Hollywood studios. These days, for example, 'The Rock' isn't there to perform well in his roles, he is there to bring in sales through his already-established fanbase. He has no ability to act; he simple plays himself: the light-hearted, funny, yet super tough guy.

I'm not particularly sure who actually enjoys these movies, but I feel they are the simple-minded folk that work tiresome jobs and just want something that is labelled as 'fun'.

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I love the F&F because it's all about "Family" and is completely absurd in every way. The actual driving sequences and the special FX neither obey the laws of physics nor common sense but that is the wonder. And stuff like this:

"Aren't you going to say goodbye?"
dramatic pause, close-up, "It's never gooodbye", series of face fades

If Moveline still existed like it did in its 90's heydays, these would all be in the Bad Movies We Love portion.

I also love to promote those with whom I may disagree!

I can't argue against the ending of 6; I mean, anyone with a heart would feel the emotion in it. It wasn't just a character, but the death of a real person, one that came too soon for sure.

I really wish there was another Tokyo Drift, though. It's the only one I've managed to enjoy, and I feel that is because the car drifting culture in the mountainous areas of Tokyo are rarely explored in the world of film. There's an additional layer of realism that adds to Tokyo Drift that, for me, makes it that much more interesting.

Fast Five in Brazil was the apex. In the "How did This Get Made" podcast for it...I can't spoil it, it's an amazing podcast that breaks down Vin Diesel and some of the behind scenes aspects on it. Too ridiculous for words.

I'll have to check that out.

Despite not enjoying the films, I'm very interested in their production.

Have you read The Devil's Candy? Fantastic, hilarious look at the making of The Bonfire of the Vanities.

Movie looks like a car racing game to me. Nice review.

That's a good way to describe the franchise: like a racing game, but if you removed the cars and replaced them with explosions of things.

Some part of the movie just look like I was playing Asphalt 8 game :)

Dude, totally. They repeat those bloody characters all over again and the worse thing is that EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM is a douchebag. I am not even talking about Vin Diesel or the Rock! just Paul Walker...

Anyhow, great post, I would like to know what u think of my writing. Cheers

I get heavily thrown off by the way Vin Diesel and The Rocks' characters are portrayed; there's something really annoying about constantly acting like the tough guy., regardless of what is thrown at them.

Can't agree more about the Rock and Vin Diesel, their movies just taste the same, and it's not even a good taste.