Cosmic Magnetism & The Fear-Override | Floor Lessons - Chapter 8 (Pt. 3 - Universal Giggle)

Concluding my festival story from S.U.N. festival 2013, read up part 1 and part2

I was a wreck, feeling the intensity of what probably should happen vs. my BS narratives how it would be weird to walk over there and start a conversation now about how I had adored her stomping the whole morning. After that brief moment of utter synchronous cosmic happening when our eyes met "randomly" she went back dancing and I decided to do the same, doing my best not to look for her but to let go of it if it was indeed such a freakin' problem to just say hi to her to release some pressure. Jeez dude, there are thousands of people here, why do you think you can not interact with this one human being?!

I didn't know, and the mind chatter about it was starting to piss me off mildly.

Guess I was disappointed in myself which can become a thought-loop on acid that I really didn't want to explore further or get stuck in.

So I let go, choosing a different neighborhood for dancing to not constantly have her in my face in the hopes that I could shake her off my mind and enjoy my day without self-made hangups.

As I was dancing I stumbled into two friends I had met the days prior, a lovely couple from Ecuador, Fedi and Stefano (probably spelling those wrong) who were radiating positivity and who I vibed with instantly. As I said, you tend to bump into the same people over the course of the week again and again. We had another marvellous energetic exchange and agreed that this first edition of the festival was an utter success and that the day was amazing. And we danced for a while until something came up, I think they wanted to go grab some food or something. "Cya in 5, guys!"

I thought I could use some food myself and went to our day tent to eat some nuts, one of the most useful and uncomplicated festival foods by far.

The party was getting really good, music got a little faster and it seemed we were slowly hitting the high point of the day, afternoon'ish judged by the angle of the sun. I talked a bit with a friend from my crew sitting by our day-tent as well, got up and wanted to get some water from the well near the mainfloor before diving back into the floor-crowd.

Boy oh boy, it was the middle of the day huh? A good hundred people just standing in line to get water. Oh well, music is right here, we got time and each other!

So I stood in line dancing, behind two ladies who were going on about something and the conversation naturally drew me in. When I thought about it later there was nothing calculated about it, just the kinds of things that happen on LSD where people act from a higher state of awareness, giving the ego and ego-needs much less .... substance. Or credence. Everything just happens without any calculation needed - just as it should be - as opposed to my developing hangup with the stomping queen.

I don't remember what we talked about but our energetics were awesome. They were two beautiful skandinavian viking queens, if you want some sort of haphazard image. White dresses with all sorts of thingies on them - rings, necklaces, one of them wore a handmade crown of sorts. Marvellously beautiful fairies really, clear skin, bright shining eyes. But as opposed to my stomping queen I did not feel any hangups about them. Maybe because I hadn't cemented any image or vision in my mind. They felt more like my long-lost sisters.

_{Not them, but kinda the same energetic neighborhood}

In a place like this everyone looks really beautiful - no stress, lots of sun and total freedom changes people and their outward appearance over the course of a week - a few days is all it takes to totally rewire even those people most stuck on their regular routines. Human beings are so adaptable, much more than we generally assume.

And it was funny because I was talking to them like their brother would even though I had never met them before. We were clear after the first sentence that we are one crew and vibed instantly.

It eventually came to our turn to get water, we said "cya around" and went our separate ways. Awesome people...

And then it kinda hit me as I watched those two girls walk over to the main floor, because they went straight to - guess who? That's right, my stomping queen, who cheered when she saw them and they hugged and chatted for a bit like they had known each other forever - they probably had. I was feeling almost guilty just observing it in awe. Was this really happening? They knew each other?! Those people in particular?!

Universe chuckled, the scene was so clear. I really didn't need a confirmation other than what I was witnessing.

The dude who got that cigarette from me earlier in the day was also there and... well you can probably guess who else. My lovely Ecuadorian couple bumped into that crew out of nowhere - they also seemed to be very familiar with her and the others in the circle. It was almost too good to be true, but here it was happening right in front of me as I watched in amazement. It literally looked like a mighty reunion of sorts, where the crew magentically ran into each other from all directions, and the only one who was missing seemed to be me. Ahahahaha.

"Dude, I am literally part of that crew - I have met all of them, hugged all of them, talked to all of them, had a great day with all of them, with our paths crossing over and over - everyone except the girl I really wanted to talk to from the very beginning!" It was too cosmic to be trivial and now I felt like the universe really couldn't get any clearer than this, what a lesson. A painful one, realizing how much energy I had invested to defend against what I actually wanted and what was cosmically "meant" to happen apparently.

I had actively invested energy to resist saying 'hi' yet all my newfound friends belonged to the same gang already. It was painful and totally enlightening at the same time. And the party was raving on!

I'm sure you want to know how that story ended? Did I finally drop everything and walked over there?

Nope, i felt "defeated" in some strange ego way and my mind was coming up with totally "plausible" reasons why it's not the end of the world and why that ship had sailed now. What a mind bamboozlement that day had been, despite of or maybe because of all its glory and clarity of action and inaction. Revelations about my path and myself, almost too much to handle but just handleable.

But strangely, it felt like a really useful lesson for me to learn from and to cherish. It was so uniquely tailored to what I needed on my path and years later i was finally able to resolve this whole thing as I will probably write about some other time.

For the moment I chose to remember her amazing dance and all these lessons of the day, and don't beat myself up too bad. I knew if I could let it go without all this mind-born seriousness I would get back into my center and an amazing state of experiencing all the quicker. And it worked, it seemed the lesson was through and universe let it go as well, finally! (By the way, thanks for that, universe! You never go further than I can manage and I love you for it!)

Didn't see her again for the rest of the festival, as it was near the end and I really needed some sleep for the impending final day as the sun was hinting at coming down and the night crowd was getting ready for their time on the main. It's incredible how the scenery changes slowly and the people change with it - nobody can go forever without rest. And I saw that many others had apparently also learned lessons during the day, caring for one another and allowing themselves to be vulnerable with other people. As well as be cherished for who they are, despite all their self-projected shortcomings.

As I was telling the story to my crew at night before everyone went to bed - sitting around in our lovely little camp with a bottle of wine - they all gave me a hug and congratulated me on my ability to let it go eventually after all these key moments during the day, sharing similar stories of their own. It's such a relief sharing your pain with others who get it.

I felt good, it suddenly seemed like it was meant to happen exactly like it did that day, and that nothing was out of place. I totally knew what I wanted to work on in myself, vowing that a scene this drastic really wasn't needed again in the future. Better to seize the chance instantly and make an ass of myself than stretching that rubber band further and further until the universe starts becoming ridiculous.

This festival-visit in Hungary had totally been worth it! I will be forever thankful for it <3

_{My crew and me at festival's end}

If you want to check out the festival in a more direct manner - more specifically its first edition in 2013 I have described here from my perspective - here's the rather unique aftermovie, as seen through the eyes of someone desperately in need of meeting the tribe and finding back to himself. A lot of us come to these festivals to reset our psyche and to heal our mental wounds through meeting likeminded people who "get it".

The nature, the vibe and the atmosphere are captured in a glorious way here, I am sure it will lighten your day by leaps and bounds.

So that concludes chapter 7 of my weird floor-lessons saga in non-chronological order.
Thank you for your time, attention and feedback everyone.

I've been meaning to share that story forever!

_{Image sources:
trancentral.tv
S.U.N. Festival FB Page
youtube.com
Crew's photo repository}

Come check out other Floor lessons:
- Making Plans is for Amateurs | Chapter 1 -
- Gratitude as Abundance-Engine | Chapter 2 -
- "We're all friends here, but you and me are NOT gonna be friends" | Chapter 3 -
- Everyone is Someone's Rolemodel | Chapter 4 -
- Feet & Friction | Chapter 5 -
- "We can totally handle this" | Chapter 6 -
- Cosmic Magnetism & The Fear-Override | Chapter 7 -

Thanks for stopping by <3