The Dog Diet

The anti- fad, anti- fat meal plan for the information averse, money lacking, obesity stricken people of the new millennium.

I have been buying my dogs the same food for as long as I can remember. Dogs do not get a variety of foods, at least not in my house,and the veterinarian always gives them a clean bill of health. I once heard a bodybuilder on YouTube (where else) talking about the fact that during the final phase of competition prep they restricted their diets to the bare minimum for vascularity and keep their body fat as low as possible. It got me to thinking, I bet it's a lot easier to do all that when you're getting paid by sponsors to do it, and you and I both know you will be shoving a $100 steak down your gullet as soon as you get off stage. So then the less cynical side of me started thinking that there might actually be something good for me to take from this approach.
Now, I recognize that dogs have different dietary requirements and restrictions than humans. Also that dogs are able to digest and neutralize a wider range of materials and bacteria. I’m not totally ignorant, I am attempting to approach this in the most simple way possible.

Fad diets have made a lot of people a lot of money over the years while simultaneously fulfilling and destroying the dreams and wallets of many more. From Atkins to South Beach to lap bands and lip, people can't help but to throw money at anyone promising to make them thin. In more recent years I feel that the market has shifted along with technology. Where once people would buy overly expensive tickets for weekend retreats and workshops in fancy hotels with weight loss gurus, now I think a lot of the big money comes from book sales, YouTube views and tea. Similar money, same ratio of success to relapse.

The modern world is a wonderful thing. Example, I will type this, do a lousy job of editing it, and post it online, all within a day. Heck, maybe someone will even read it. But if the modern world teaches us anything, it's that you have to take the good with the bad. Sure, you can talk to your spouse in a hotel across the world via webcam and that is a great tool for corporate yes men and military heroes. Remember though, according to the internet Mark Zuckerberg covers his webcam in case of prying fingers with watchful eyes.

The modern diet is among the most complex areas of growth. Refrigerated shipping containers allow fresh durian fruit to arrive in San Francisco from Thailand, and that's awesome. Better storage means longer lasting, and that means more food makes it to market which contributes to the myriad reasons that food prices have gone down. Where variety and general access to food have increased quality of life across the board, more food means more variety, which allows us to eat for taste instead of purely for sustenance. In far too many cases, all of these things lead to obesity. Coupled with the fact that we have enough machines to allow us to avoid walking to the store or even leaving the house, and you have a clear path to the Wall-e style chair train.

All of these things have been floating around in my mind and I began to think about the past. People didn't use to eat a variety of things. A farmer of potatoes and chickens would eat potatoes and chickens. A fisherman would trade his extra fish for a potato and eat fish and potatoes, adding fish to that farmer’s table for a day. A school teacher in a village would eat whatever produce the children in his or her classroom's parents were harvesting that year. I over simplify, but you understand.

Obviously exercise is a big part of living a healthy life, but I've heard it said that diet is upwards of 70-90% of weight loss. Well, I want to lose weight. Frankly, I am fat. I am fat enough that I wear button down shirts literally every day of my life to keep my moobs at bay. I have always been big, but until shortly after high school I was very athletic and lifted weights. My most recent birthday came with the realization that highschool is firmly in the past and Bruce Springsteen's "Glory Days" would be my future if I didn't take some responsibility for my size, thoughts and actions. Enter the dog diet.

I was beginning to consider taking on the paleo diet for a few days last year until I read up on it and realized that, while I believe it has it's merits, the execution of it felt like just another fad diet, which spelled failure for me. That said, certain aspects of the diet resonated with me and have played heavily into developing my idea for my weight loss plan. Without being diligent, opening a new webpage and googling the paleo diet these are some of the aspects I seem to remember that appealed to me.

1. Eating only foods that ancient man could pick up and eat.
2. No processed foods
3. Keep it simple: Protein, fiber, vitamins

I said I wouldn’t Google it and I didn't, probably despite my better judgment. The thought of eating foods that God created in their natural state is one that resonates with me. In the last year I have been holding certain dietary restrictions due to my faith, and I have always been an outdoorsman, hunter/ gatherer type (at least in my mind :/ ). It is my belief that from ancient man up until the last century or so only the rich ever really ate foods foreign to them without traveling to other lands and eating them there. I would think that even in those cases those who could afford luxury at home would be eating whatever animals could be brought alive or whatever fruits, seed and nuts would keep or be dried for the journey. Just like my dog, man has always had a restricted diet. And so, today I have begun what I call the dog diet. The parameters, as unscientific as they are, so far are as follow. I might modify things based on stuff, and will update if that becomes the case.

This morning, September 14, 2017 I began a three day fast. This fast will consist of eating nothing and drinking only water. I will also continue walking a minimum one continuous hour each day.

Beginning Sunday, September 17, 2017 I will begin eating like a dog. I will eat two meals and one snack per day. Each meal will consist of the same foods daily. This meal plan will continue for a period of one month until October 17, 2017. The initial 30 day meal plan will be a raw vegan diet. I will not ingest any alcohol during this initial time. I will update with my food plan, exercise plan and other information later.

The purpose in me doing this is not to encourage others to join me. I simply want to present an approach to increasing the quality of one's life without going absolutely insane with number crunching and calorie counting. All information is good, but I believe common sense (which arguably is achieved through knowledge) is the best way to accomplish weight loss goals.