An American 'Vegemite' Review
by @jeffjagoe
Inspired by @dylansmith
@dylansmith's Vegemite Protocol: https://steemit.com/food/@dylansmith/5-tips-to-make-vegemite-toast-from-an-aussie
Recently I convinced @dylansmith to join STEEM. Here's an introduction I made for him. He wrote a step-by-step guide to making Vegemite toast. Where I come from, Vegemite is unheard of... unless you're listening to the Men at Work. I always thought it looked and sounded disgusting but @dylansmith convinced me to give it a try. He claimed it was a mood fixer, hangover cure and all-around lovable super-food. With this advice, I had to give it a go.
The Bread
@dylansmith says the bread is important. I found the best white bread I could get from The Vermont Bread Company. It should hold together when I spread the Vegemite tar...
Toast it up!
I got toasty with it. Not too dark. Not too light... Just about right.
Butter it up!
I spread a good amount of butter, but I may have failed to get it to the edges as @dylansmith insisted. Regardless, it was ready for some Vegemite.
VEGEMITE!
I felt like a criminal when I was doing this. I have a perfect piece of buttered toast in front of me and I'm about to squeeze a big ol' glob of Vegemite onto it. I could be putting some delicious jam, or some scrambled eggs or even some fresh ground cinnamon... but no, instead I'm squeezing out yeast extract. Sorry @dylansmith, but I was never feeling good about this one...
All About Balance!
The Vegemite master says it's all about the balance. I think I found a solid balance between the Vegemite and butter. I spread it around good and got ready for the experience of a lifetime...
It's Munch Time..
The Verdict: DISGUSTING
I don't know what they're thinking Down Under but I thought this tasted like shitty soy sauce mixed with the last sips of a beer that has been sitting out in the sun for a few days. Do they even have peanut butter in Australia? Do we need to increase our exports down there? Why would you put such a thing on a delicious piece of buttered toast? I don't understand... I don't think I will ever be using the rest of this tube, unless I can find a recipe to use it as an additive (and even then I am skeptical). It has been 8 hours since I tried the Vegemite and writing this gives me a disgusting taste in my mouth.
It's not the first time an Australian convinced me to try one of their food products via STEEM. @mattclarke bought me some Crumpets a few months back. You can check out that post in the link below. Let's just say Crumpets were HEAPS better than this Vegemite stuff...
An American Crumpet Review
What's Next?!
Hahahaha I didn't expect the disgusting part 😂😂😂😂😂 hilarious!
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Have you ever tried this stuff?!
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Yes, Vegemite is indeed vile. It's not human food brah, leave that shit for insulating roofs in Michigan during the winter.
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😂 this reminds me of when I first tried it on a slice of bread... wasn't the best experience 😂😂
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I love the stuff!!! Salted butter is the key.
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The salted butter didn’t cut it for me... I’ll be sticking to jam and fruit spreads from here on out haha
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Lol, an aquired taste for sure.... i actually crave it sometimes!
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It's SO TRUE that it's about balance! Right out of the tube the stuff is ROUGH but spread thin, with butter to cut the intensity its quite nice! Soon I couldn't get enough!
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Perhaps I will have to force it down a few more times before I begin to see the beauty...
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I'm telling you, it's sneaky stuff -it grows on you- a lot like stockholm syndrome lol
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lol stockholm syndrome :)
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;)
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you guys are just too hard on this stuff. Its bloody amazing. Follow my vegemite protocol and you will start winning more at life :)
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The Vegemite Protocol sounds like it should be an intense action-thriller movie starring Hugh Jackman 😂
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Hahaha! Yeah, that stuff is gross. lol
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Hahah its rare when other nationalities like it! Lol i think marmite and promite are gross!
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LOL Great review. I always wanted to try it. Now I want to try it a lot less.
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Stick to the good stuff!
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mate, don't give up on it. Please follow my vegemite protocol and give it a few more tries.
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Aaah, perfectly reasonable reaction. We all love it, but we're pretty sure it's because we were raised with it as kids.
You did everything right, by the way. That looked fantastic, I'll eat four that look just like that, for breakfast every morning.
Full marks for giving it a crack, mate :)
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I love how Vegemite sounds like a badass vegan chick in an episode of Sailor Moon. Unfortunately she’s nasty and not in the good way either :(
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