Letters from former kids in care case #3

in fostergate •  7 years ago 

Here is a letter from a former kid in care. He has seen an excessive amount of abuse. I will do this one a little different as it was many pages and each page needs decoding and will need a rundown so please bear with me here.

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This was his first memory of his foster mom.

I can't quite figure out the name of the school basicly he said that his first memory was him fighting her son and she beat him she had hit him before but this time he really got it.

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I came from Steinback kindergarden is all I had the put me schooled class there as so said they passed me any ways but was told anything...
Learned on my own...

Here he say's he was in Steinback before he was taken into care. He said he had trouble learning a bit but was passed any way. He said he later would figure things out.

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I can't figure this one out but he said that everyone would pick on him at home and at school and the stress would give him really bad headaches. He said he was at 708 Lipton street.

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He said that at Lipton street she beat him and abused him in everyway. He said she was sexually abusing him and told him to never get a girl or cheat on her or he would get it. He trembled when he said this. He said he was so scared and parinoid from the abuse she had done to him.

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Life was a depression from know I never finished school cause raped was a buries..... never forget ever thing pound lots in

He said he really wanted to finish school but everything was too much to deal with. He says the memories of his abuse plague his mind. He said he was made to have sex with her many times.

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Here he was talking about how he was given booze. And how everyone at home would pick on him and hit him. And she would often tell him he was going to be a dad on day.

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Here he said that no would beleive him because he was FASD. He says he wants to know why she raped him. Why did she get away while he remains lost with these memories everyday.

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Learn to grow up becoming a hooker as a kid. He said this was helped him get stuff because his foster parent would never buy him stuff like the other kids. He would get hand me downs and she kept the clothing allowance.

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He said here that he doesn't think he is schizophrenic as he only hears 1 voice and its mostly memories of her put downs, her screaming and the fucked up things she would say.

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Here he said everytime he mentioned money he was screamed at and abused. He said she took everything from him ruined what ever might have been.

This was hard some of the pages I did not show because it identified him or was too odd. Once I see him agian I will do another where I write.
He wasn't a meth head. He was the most broken person I met. I have seen this man downtown many of times and he has never looked like a schizophrenic (talking to himself) always sad and lost yet as in some deep thought. Who knows what might have been had this boy been protected. This fucking city is evil. Often times those with special needs are easy picking for pedophiles and have many abusers.

We must make the pedophiles afraid.

We must make them...

Expect us

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This is gutting. I don't know what to say. I can see why making them afraid feels like the answer - because there's so much anger - but as @shivvi says, they are already afraid. In so many ways. Because so much of the time it was done to them - intergenerationally or otherwise. There has to be a more effective tactic.

Well, we could mass execute pedophiles.

That would work and may be the only way.

This is just so very sad. I cant believe that an adult who is supposed to care for a child will end of abusing and even raping the child. Who then should the child turn to. To make matters even worse, it sounds like he is now broken and battered. I can only wish that he somehow manages to pick up the pieces of his life and start over. Abuse is such an evil thing that has to be stopped.

I read this post and then sat for a very long time not knowing whether to reply and what to say. I dont think that the answer is to make the paedophiles afraid because they are already very afraid. They are expecting comeback every single time and no doubt surprised when there is none. Childhood Sexual abuse changes the course of every victims life. There are survival stories, but not so many maybe. It interferes with every relationship, sexual or platonic ever after. It interferes with the very core of you and your worth. It interferes with your memories and your trust in your own memories. I am so sad to read this account. Of coarse you think you're sczizophrenic if you can still hear the voice of your abuser and your memories just wont slot together. I am so sad for this tormented life.

So sweet...