"A Radical View" of 3 Inter-connected Signs Someone You Call a "Friend" is Actually a "Negator"

Have you ever met someone you thought was genuine yet, something about their personality seems off? This happens to me all of the time! I get to know someone, get close to them and then BOOM! There is something about their behavior, actions and/or words that inform me to just back away and/or distance myself. Stop getting sucked into these "Negators."

Below I take my personal experience and expertise about the psychology and describe what the worst tactics I believe those who are whom I describe as the "Negators" use to bring others down. Alternatively, when I also explain these behaviors and why people engage in them and then I give you some professional advice on what you can do about these people "Negators."

The worst place to get rid of and/or have negativity follow one is and always will be the workplace. Most of us rely on our jobs and careers to pay our bills and/or provide for ourselves and our families so when you have problems like dealing with someone who, at first was nice but then you find they will throw you under a bus for advancement, it can be quite annoying and also very difficult to deal with.

According to author of the book entitled "The Undefeated Mind: On the Science of Constructing and Indestructible Self" and doctor named Dr. Alex Lickerman he clearly states that a so-called "true friend" will always place their friends happiness before their friendship. Furthermore he also states that true friends will always say it how it is, no matter how hurtful it may be, they will always be truthful to you even if you don't want to listen to it.

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This might sound negative however, because it is in your best interest and you can therefore, correct or make changes, it is actually for the betterment in the end. because all that friend wants for you is the best for you. This friend will also totally believe in all you can do, encourage you and keep you moving forward.

3 Major and Inter-connected Signs Someone You Call a Friend is Negatively Impacting Your Life:

#1. Demanding: This here is a good sign to tell if the person you are engaging with is actually just trying to suck you in and drag you down. Some of the behaviors that these people possess are things like, calling profusely, call after call after call. If you don't answer on the first rig, you are getting mean and nasty messages that you are say ignoring them or purposefully not taking their calls.

Another good one is when they may ask you to do a favor. Most friends that are good will say can you do this for me, when you get a chance or when it is convenient for you and not put pressure on you to do it. Good friends will ask once and will feel to bothersome to ask more than twice before they ask someone else or just do it themselves.

A demanding person has no patience and will make you feel bad if you don't do that favor right there and then, negative people will want you to drop all of your important and otherwise priorities and just wont care what you have going as long as what they need accomplished is completed.

#2. Manipulation: Manipulative tactics are horrible and extremely abusive. Anything that the person does to skillfully try and make you change your behavior in an otherwise controlled or deceptive way is a manipulation tactic. For example putting a guilt trip on you, lying to you about the smallest of things like who took the last cookie is another. Someone who seems nice but is really a manipulator tends to make demands.

Negative people believe that they are superior than those around them, so they use other people to satisfy their own agenda. Moreover, someone who puts self-doubt or fear (playing with your emotions) to their friends is manipulative and should be avoided at all costs. This is a major killer and in my opinion is the worst of the five signs because it is purposefully and pre-meditated.

Alternately, the "negator" will also use scapegoating, blame others for their action and minimize all of their wrongs and worst of all, they can and will not admit to anything. Another thing that they will do to you is put pressure on you to do things you don't want to do, like accompany them somewhere or do something that is considered illegal, moral or ethical and if anything happens like you get caught, they will throw you under the bus.

#3. Person Always Plays the Victim (Poor Me): In the field of psychology this is often called self-victimization. Someone that is constantly playing the victim is negative and will over time place a toll on one who is having to keep up with such behavior. A person who displays this characteristic will want attention, pity and have empathy constantly. The abuser will drive all the attention from themselves by justification and claims that the abuse was therefore justified.

Playing the victim or self-victimization has two purposes really, to escape bad judgments towards themselves and to others. If you think of a hamster running on a wheel, this is almost the exact same thing because they are wasting your time by sucking you into the drama and then shifting the story. In a way that the abuser will deal with cognitive dissonance that will result from the inconsistent behaviors in the way that they treat you and what they actually believe about themselves.

Different Spin on How To Personally Deal With Negative People - Watch This!!

In closing, you deserve to be happy and to be around people who will lift you up and respect your life, family and surroundings. Anyone who disrespects your friendship, diminishes your trust and talks down to you needs to hit the road. To me respect is a very important factor in friendship. Treat those how you would like to be treated in return. I believe that this concept is rather simple yet, I find it very rare these days to find friend that have this characteristic. It honestly isn't that difficult.

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