A shot to the head (freewrite)

in freewrite •  7 years ago 

Her eyes are heavy now, heavy with the dusk of sleep and the immeasurable senses of nightfall. And of great pain. She's always associated great pain with night-time, although she is not sure why. Perhaps it's because, during the night, it feels as if a million wasps were stinging her heart and hurting and...and...
She can no longer find the words because the music is rising loud and it's late and she's very tired and it hurts to fight and to scream and to try to stop herself from crying. So she succumbs to the wasp-like pain in her heart and falls down to the floor and writhes in the absolute pain of mot knowing what to do.
Or how to do it.

She realizes, to her amazement, that she's never been quite in this point of life before. She's never known exactly what to do, because it was the first time doing it and nobody warned her about the pain that would come. She didn't think it would be quite so great and she doesn't know if she can survive.
It sure feels like she can't.

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Swarms of wasps buzzing around her face, around her swollen head. Swollen, of course, from the inside, because it's not the sting of the wasps that has destroyed her, but her own thoughts. She sees herself helpless before the little insects, coming forever closer, until in one swift move, they will all sink their little needles into her eyes.
And it dawns on her that they have been moving forever closer her whole life, and that she never could really escape.

Written from the prompt word 'wasps', for @mariannewest's 5 Minute Freewrite Challenge.

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Ouch, the eyes of all places. That surely put the sting in her sadness.

I think she was stung before, but yeah, it does add an extra touch of nasty ;)

Oh wow...this is painfully and beautifully written.

Thank you @whatisnew, I hope you mean that in a good way ;P

Yes, in a good, fantastic way! : )

  ·  7 years ago (edited)

Very deep, it led me to imagine the pain that would cause the sting of a million wasps in the heart, something really comparable with the death of a relative.

This 5 minute challenge is to obtain excellent results like yours, keep it up, I liked it. Greetings.

Thank you, Manuel, you flatter me ;)

Yes, I think it could be the death of a relative, or any other sort of pain that you fear you might not survive...

Agdkhf I love everything you write! I listed it in my last post, hope that's ok? (maybe one of my 3 readers will drop by xD)

Sure, it's fine ;) And thank you, you're too sweet!

During the night, there are usually less distractions and it's easier to hear the buzzing of our thoughts. So much sadness closing in on her, poor dear!

Yes, it's sometimes very horrible to be surrounded by nothing but thoughts :/

Hello Honeydue! Thanks again for all of the time that you take to visit the freewriters as well as delivering the prompts! I hope that you have a terrific day!

Some people have requested updated links to the newest spreadsheet, so here it is!
https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1AUTuGRu5pDgYodulDQVHqIth_Bbr3saHde66ErcLhQQ/edit#gid=0

Thank you, @brisby, you as well!

This is so intense and sad