Troublesome Nonsense -5minutefreewrite (x3)

For https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/the-weekend-freewrite-5-18-2019-part-3-the-dramatic-twist

I got progressively more and more frightened of ocean sailing until I just couldn't deal with the stress any more. I got a bigger boat...

And then I wasn't afraid anymore. The boat was filed with my home. I put it between the other large purchases in my filing cabinet. I left it there. Obviously, I wasn't going to be ocean sailing, so I moved back to the middle of canada, where I wouldn't be close to any water at all. I think it's fun to type without looking at the screen. I wonder I;f I;, doing it right.

Hey. That was pretty good for a while.

@stinawog was dancing to the music timer I decided to use. I dunno if I'll do this usually. I think the music is not helping me focus. To be fair, it's work out music. So it doesn't aid thinking.

I dunno. I sometimes thing the "binaural beats" I use to write stories is also distracting. It gets me to keep writing.

Oh my god, a change in the music made me think it was done, but I have two more minutes left. Very poorly designed music. DUMB

ok. this freewrite has turned out to be just about the music I'm playing with the freewrite. Which I will point out is fine. A freewrite is just whatever it is. And no one needs to think they're doing it wrong.

Ugh my nose. I think i have allergies. I didn't used to. I used to be a super person with no problems. Now I got glasses and I sneeze a lot and I have feet pains and and and I am falling apart. I wonder if there's a way to get old without getting old. Nanobots, please come fix me.

Before you even look at that man, you want to learn about his history. He has a long, storied history of becoming one with his environment. Now that you know that, you can't see him. Yep, the perceptions we have of people impact how we see them. Or in his case, how we don't see them. He is a master camoflauger. And the stories he can tell about becoming a tree...? Bwah. Better than any actor who plays a tree in a play.

Is this a metaphor, too, about how what other people tell us about a person impacts how we see them? like, if you didn't know that I was poor, would you think I was rich? And vice versa? If I told you I was rich, would you believe me?

If I told you I could do anything, just pay me, would you? I wonder about that damn confidence people are always talking about. I know I'm incredible, but I also have to keep it under wraps a bit, because cockiness is not confidence. But that's not who I need to fool. Wait, what? Why is this called music for kids? It's a lot like those binaural beats. I mean, sure, kids could enjoy this. But whatever.

Hey, you know Miles Davis? I wanna listen to him now. Blah blah blah. I want to play games. It's been weeks since I last played a board game with other people. Other people or myself. I mean, I've played games online that are board games in the non-virtual realm, so I feel like that kind of counts. And I was playing them with other people. But I really like them in person...

Winter will be here soon... if you're in the southern Hemisphere. Him-isphere. More like HER mis phere.

WHat. no.

Hem. Is. Fear.

Ha. be afraid of making pants a little shorter so they don't drag.

Hem is fear.

You live your life all worried about those litte things. I see it. I see the hemming on your pants. I see in your face that you worry and worry. Unhem yourself. live your life without fear. Sip cool coffee in a brightly lit mall. Lots of natural light in this mall. Those skylights are nice. and the potted trees make it so you can almost imagine you're on a boulevard in france, when really you're in a kind of boring part of a city that is, itself exciting, but that seems like too much work. So you sit here, and just down the way you could get sunglasses at a kiosk for if you ever venture outside again.

Why are malls so much fun? What is that feeling they give us? Why does life feel hard sometimes? Why do malls feel safe? Why don't real cobblestone streets.... capitalism is dead.

I mean... there's a romance to the beginnings of capitalism... the cafe and the bookseller. The cobbler and the little whatever where you get bread. a bakery. These little things... Isn't that nice?

But where they exist, it's not because of capitalism's best efforts, it's in spite of. It's all make believe.