Overdrive: a short fiction story [Part II]

in freewrite •  6 years ago  (edited)

overdrive (1).jpg

I've run out of energy and fire to talk. "Quickly, I must think of something." Maybe it was because of the full moon and the weird mood it brought earlier, I decided to do a mini-test of courage with my friend. I imagined daring her to stare at the outside. Thinking in my head to scare her a bit... Boy, I was so getting punk'd by Karma.

/click here to read from the start/


We were driving on an empty road

It was around midnight then and the road felt so empty. It was only just us coasting on the dreary roads homebound since most of the visitors at the resort spent the night there. I'm sitting on the rightmost side of the van with the window wide open to let in the cool night breeze. Everything seemed like a perfect buildup for what's to come next.

Remember that bit earlier when I said I have poor eyesight and all? Until this time, I'm still wondering WHY was I was seeing it so vividly, like high-definition-level clear. Take note that the next events happen in a span of a few seconds. So aside from being weirded out by the experience, I was also severely impressed by how my eyes and brain processed it on that small timeframe. Just after the thought of pranking my friend crossed my mind, I, of course, instinctively looked out the window first.

Several meters ahead, I saw a silhouette clad in white.

Ayan na. Sa puntong ito, mapagbiro at kwela pa talaga ang timpla ko noon. Kasi medyo may maitim nga akong balak na mang-troll ng kaibigan. Mabilis lang talaga ang balik ng karma noon. Ako ay kinalibutan na nang makita ko ang puting telang nasa gilid ng kalasada mula sa malayo. Pero dahil marahil hindi pumayag ang aking utak na may maiwang mga katanungan, minabuti kong magmasid pa at mas intuon ang atensyon ko sa mahiwagang pangitain kaysa sa ibaling sa iba ang aking tingin.

The glowing moon has irradiated the open roads making the object quite visible. It also instantly drew my attention, like it was a primary subject on a stage play where the director orchestrated all the lighting to focus on it. To me, the object seemed somewhat luminescent.

That was my initial observation several meters away. I was still a bit chill at this point and I haven't thought of it as anything out of the ordinary yet. I immediately rationalized that maybe it's just a white cloth hanging ... like maybe a dress left to dry out ... in the middle of a public road ... in a cold breezy night. I know it made zero sense but I had to come up with a potential logical explanation fast.

I still can't take my eyes off of it as we're nearing the figure. At this opportune moment when we're about to get the closest, I decided to validate my silly theory. I turned my gaze downward. As I did, I observed that the white cloth was not just a haphazardly hanged cloth, it was a white dress - a rustic and a bit old-fashioned style at that. My eyes continued towards the ground, looking for that upright wood where this white dress is hanging from. We're almost parallel to the figure and I'm staring wide-eyed, aghast at the bottom of it.

Ito ang bahaging sinasabi ko na nagpakitang-gilas ang aking matabang utak. Ewan ko ba kung bakit dun pa sa pagkakataon na iyon nagpabibo. Sa bilis ng sasakyan, nagawa ko pang magproseso ng kung anu-anong mga sitwasyon at posibleng katwiran. Bagama't parang waley ang aking hinuha na "baka damit lang ito na naiwang nakasampay" (oo, napagtawanan na ako ng aking kaibigan nang husto nang ikuwento ko iyan), mainam na rin at naisip ko yun. Dahil dun nabigyan ako ng pagkakataon na magusisa pa at kilatisin ng mabuti ang mahiwagang pangitain.

My head went into overdrive

I was starting to get terrified. Not because of what I saw but because of what I did not see.

Nothing. It was just an empty space.

Man, my eyes suck at picking the moments to function at optimum. At that point, I was practically the closest person to the white figure. The van was about right across from it so I'm maybe a meter or two away. I clearly saw nothing but the ground and roadside grass. The cloth was raised well above a foot above the ground but there's no post, no wood ... not any leg of any sort to keep the thing upright. It was hard to believe, but I've got no other option but to conclude that it was floating.

Nanglamig na talaga ako pag-angat ng mata ko. Windang na ako nang makita ko na nakalutang ang bagay na iyon, na hindi pala basta-bastang saplot lang na nakasabit sa kung ano. Ito ay naka-makalumang gayak - at nakalutang pa!

While I was calm and being logical before (even for the silliest excuses), I've started freaking out soon. Despite getting severely spooked, I'm still trying to puzzle out the phenomenon of the white floating dress. I was able to muster enough courage and foolishness to look up. I wouldn't think that anything at that time would top the "floating" revelation but something did. We just went past it and we were quickly gaining distance. But before completely losing it from view, I saw it.

On top of the floating white old-fashioned dress, a faceless head with shoulder-length, slightly messy black hair sits. And even without evident eyes and other facial features, it seemed to move its "head" by just a fraction, locking its gaze towards us.

Pag lumingon ka, akin ka.

I'm glad I wasn't driving

I closed my window immediately. As expected, I full on freaked out. My seatmate did as well. It turns out that she saw it too but not as clear and as detailed as I had. The rest were sleeping so we were only the two ones who witnessed the phenomenon. We frantically talked about what we saw and the driver thankfully turned on the light inside the van. Sleeping people be damned, we need light!

It was past midnight and we were weary, so the slight hysteria eventually dulled down. The lights were left on and we purposely never looked outside for the rest of the ride. At the back of my head, I was extremely grateful that we were riding on more-than-maximum capacity. What if there was an empty seat left? Would it have hitchhiked instead of letting us get away with a haunting gaze? My heart would seriously burst out if after I close my window, I'll find the white figure seated beside me.

Sa totoo lang, matapos ang inisyal na takot, nagtawanan na kaming dalawa ng kaibigan ko. Pinoy nga naman. "Gusto ko nang ipasok sa mata ko yun panyo ... haha", bitaw ng kaibigan kong nakasaksi din. At kinuwento ko naman ang aking henyong "sampayan theory". Haha. Napaka-supportive naman po ng tito ng aming kaibigan at binuksan nya ang ilaw. Syempre pagbukas ng ilaw, nagbilang na kami agad ng mga kasama din. Dapat siguradong kumpleto at tama pa kami sa bilang diba? Baka may kulang ... o sobra.

We got home safely with no further excitement. My friend's uncle, the driver, revealed that he saw it too. He was calm and did not react at all then, but he verified that he saw something too. That's the reason why he turned on the lights. Maybe he wanted to check if it came with. I was kind of amazed how he handled it as if nothing happened. He kept calm, unlike us kids who were freaking. Since he was familiar with the route, maybe it's not the first he had seen it.

It was a very memorable event for me. Aside from getting creeped out up to eleven, a highlight from the experience was how well my eyes performed. It was a first. Not a first for a non-normal event but a first time that my eyes cooperated 100% with what I wanted to do. Maybe I can still learn to drive?

Nah. Still not interested.

END


Nailathala ko po ang blog na wala ang mga Tagalog na parte, pero nabanggit ng ilang mambabsa na na-miss daw nila ito kaya naman hinabol ko iyon at nilagay. Maraming pang kaparehas at kakaibang pangyayari ang baon ko. Ikukuwento ko pa ba? Lol


Tagging @chinitacharmer! Please write your own horror story too. Really looking forward to reading it. The writing with comical Tagalog sections interspersed in the post was inspired by @adamada. Thanks bruh.


Image by Jack Ward from Unsplash edited using SparkAdobe.com

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  
Hello.😊

Congratulations @jazzhero, your post has been featured at Best of PH Featured Posts.

You may check the post here.😉


About @BestOfPH

We are a curation initiative that is driven to promote Filipino authors who
are producing quality and share-worthy contents on Steemit.


See Curation/Delegation Incentive Scheme here. Be sure to leave at least 50SP undelegated on your account.

Follow our trail and vote for curated Pinoy authors. If you are a SteemAuto user, @bestofph is an available trail to follow.

If you want to be part of the community, join us on Discord

Thanks for the feature @bestofph! And thank you @noreen for curating my post 💖

Inabangan ko talaga ang continuation ng story mo,@jazzhero. Nabitin yong pagkatakot ko sa part 1.😊 😉

Si Maine naman daw ang kasunod na hihirit sa horror haha. Sana kayanin natin.
Salamat sa support, Noreen!

imagine driving alone and stumble upon that floating entity, must be a tough decision whether to look at the backseat or not lol.

Man, I hear stories that it happens. If I were the driver I'll probably just try my best to focus on the road and let the hitchhiker be, whether it's really there or not. I think I was the only who noticed the floating bit because I was so close, the rest didn't.

I guess I would also do the same, just like what they say curiosity kills the cat but the lingering terror must still make it hard to focus. I am never going to travelling alone lol

There are also stories circulating in our town about a bridge in our area where you need to hit the horn first before crossing because no matter how fast you go the engine will die, 2 of my friends experienced it themselves so that made it creepier for me.

These stories seem like a good plot for a manga. I recall a similar story about the engine dying. Might we be from the same place? lol.

The story I wrote took place on the road on our way to Laguna coming from Batangas.

That may be so, but the thing is, a horror story rarely gets popular in that industry but when they do they get real big and gets niche followers. I miss the old books though that I bought in bookstores when I was younger about collections of horror stories, they made me afraid of staying up late alone but the internet made me resistant to that now lol.

I am from Nueva Ecija, but I think Laguna has more of those horror stories because of the topography there. I have been there when I was in high school for a jamborette and in the place we were stationed all I can see is vast mountain and forest. When night falls I will just sleep after eating dinner haha.

You make a very valid point. Magakas like Junji Ito is the only one I know who got popular in the industry. But his works are too extreme for me XD.

I think you've been to Los Banos, Laguna. That's like top 1 creepy place here.

Yeah they are how do I put it, more on the disturbing side than scary? haha

Oh you nailed it, it was Los Banos and all I can see is nature but at night it really is scary lol

First... I like the idea that you're a stare-at-the-moon type of guy. Lol! 😂😂😂 Wala lang, gusto ko lang sabihin yan.

Seriously, I still can't get over the fact that you made the narration in a conversational type (tipong tropa tropa lang) and yet you managed to produce an intelligently-stitched story. Paano mo ginagawa yan Jazz?🤔Aside from the excellent material to share, you conveyed how good of a writer and a storyteller you are.Great job as always! Been a fan since the tagalog work you shared (yung may bulag na main character).

Lol. Nahuli mo ang aking emo moment nun high school. Graduate na ako sa pagka-emo pero moody pa din hanggang ngayon 😂

Salamat sa feedback. Ang casual na style ay tinugma ko para mas maging kwela ang horror experience. Nakaflatter ang iyong comment XD Salamat sa support, Val.

Omg horror pala'to. 😱😱😱 Mas bet ko magbasa ng horror kesa manood. Pero keteket tlga pg horror. 😂

Posted using Partiko Android

Oo ang aga ng holloween namin. Yun #tagalogserye na upcoming horror na naman:
Team Brutal vs Team Mumu lol Salamat sa pagbabasa!

Wah grabe nmn yun, team brutal vs team mumu... Parang ok magsulat din ng horror ah. Hmmm. 😅

Posted using Partiko Android

Seriously nandito pa lang ako “On top of the floating white old-fashioned dress, a faceless head with...” naiiyak na ko. I dont wanna go any further. 😱 Damn it kuya @jazzhero bat ka ganyan?! Haha 😩

Posted using Partiko iOS

Medjo naiba nga, hindi nakakadiri yun pangyayari 😅 Pero wag ka mag-alala after nyan, tapos na ang horror part. Pasensya na haha, alam kong ayaw mo sa mga mumu. Pang "saw" yun horror mo XD

Naku. Buti nga di yung naiisip ko yung nangyari. This is much better. As in teary-eyed na talaga ako sa kaba. No joke.
I used to write ng mga 2-3 sentences horror stories sa dati kong tumblr. Tinigil ko lang kasi ako mismo nagsulat pero ako din ang natatakot. Hahaha
Ma-try nga sa steemit yun minsan. Haha 😅

Posted using Partiko iOS

  ·  6 years ago (edited)

Grabe, napakalikot din siguro ng utak mo pag dating sa horror. Meron ka pang tumblr shorts dati. Medyo kabado din ako pagdating sa ganyan, lalo na't base sa totoong experience yung madalas kong makukuwento lol. Kung anuman yung una mong naisip, parang ayoko na alamin haha. Hindi ko na ata kaya.

Pero tuloy natin yan. Si Maine ang ti-nag ko next, baka ikaw naman pwede sa susunod :)

"Pag lumingon ka, akin ka!" sabi ng faceless whitelady. 😂

Grabe to! This is the very reason why I don't do long distance drive at night kasi what if may makita aqng mumo. Haha

Pero mas grabe yung writing style mo dito Jazz, on both parts actually. The vivid and descriptive language you used added depth to the story! It feels like I was there too. Busog na busog ang aking human senses, lalo na my imagination. Great job, as always.

And yes, isusulat ko na rin iyong akin. Pero ang ganda ng pagka narrate mo. Na intimidate ako. 😅😂

Haha, ginamit ko ang line mo. Sakto e lol. Nilapatan ko ng Tagalog ang akda. Para ngang may kulang kapag wala. Salamat at nasiyahan ka sa narration. Ginawa kong medyo casual ang estilo na para bang bonfire storytelling experience.

Baka hindi ko kayanin yun isusulat mo, pero ready na akong ma-praning haha.

Wahahahaha! Gustong gusto ko talaga ang Tagalog version Jazz. Di ko alam kung kaya ko gayahin, pero nakaka engganyo rin talagang gawin. 😄

Buti English!

Dahil ang vocabulary ko sa Ingles ay hindi ganun kahusay hindi sya nakakatakot at walang picture. Pero na-imagine ko yung punto na may appearing act na yung tela. Grabe! Pero sympre hanggang imagine lang ako kasi nga ayaw ko nang mga ganitong eksena hahah.

Suicide-suicide lang ako pag mumu na wala na.

TP, ang extreme ng potential reaction mo haha. In reality, wala pang 5 seconds yun pangyayari, kaya madali din maka-move on. Yun ilalabas ni Maine na kwento ang mas level up.

Pero Jazz when there are some instances na kahit 5 seconds or 3 seconds lang ang mga kaganapan parang ang nangyari ay nag slow motion. Tapos sobrang detalyado at naka imprint na sa utak.

Medyo tama ka dyan TP, ang 5 seconds na yun ay naimprint na rin sa utak ko, kaya naman nakukuwento ko parin kahit lagpas isang dekada na ang lumipas lol. Parang gusto ko pa magkwento ulit haha

  • labasan ng horror experience
  • whoa. Awesome story
  • minsan gusto mo tanungin ang sarili mo kung totoo ba?
  • mumu ba talaga yung nakita ko
  • logical thinking vs real experience
  • can there be really other entities than us, humans?
  • awoooo

Abangan mo yun kuwento ni Maine, mas mapapaisip tayo panigurado.

  • ok yan.
  • ginaganahan ata ako magbasa ngayon ?!

that was real spooky man! i havent experienced the paranormal yet, but im sure not wishing to! haha

you are missing out, man. haha. kidding. I made it as casual and as fun as possible to make it less creepy. Thanks for dropping the post on c-squared :)

Believe me, thats the kind of missing out id rather have man! Haha


This post was shared in the Curation Collective Discord community for curators, and upvoted and resteemed by the @c-squared community account after manual review.

💖💖💖

Congratulations @jazzhero! You have completed the following achievement on Steemit and have been rewarded with new badge(s) :

Award for the number of comments

Click on the badge to view your Board of Honor.
If you no longer want to receive notifications, reply to this comment with the word STOP

Do you like SteemitBoard's project? Then Vote for its witness and get one more award!