room service.
Yesterday I was alone, and anxious.
In a new city (Girona, Spain), I was so hungry in my hotel room that I ate a kit-kat bar out of the mini fridge.
My friend missed her flight so I was alone in a different way than I had been before.
I was unexpectedly alone.
I wanted to go out and eat but I felt someone would judge me for being alone even though I’ve eaten by myself in countless other cities.
When I’m hungry, my anxiety gets much worse, so I felt my only hope for good was room service.
Next to the phone, I read the menu.
Lots of options I love.
I mean — they had spaghetti.
But for some reason, I was unable to pick up the phone and order.
I didn’t want the hotel to think I was alone, and afraid to go out.
It’s irrational, but I completely choked.
A friend from home said:
“just order food nobody will judge you. They don’t know your story, you good be a model coming their to work, or the heiress to w great fortune, or a business woman just stopping through, but you need to eat”
This made me feel a lot better but I was still too anxious.
So I got fully dressed to go out, nervous that I didn’t look good in clothes I normally love.
I put on a full face of makeup for the first time in many months, sunglasses,
and I went out.
I ate a burger at a vegan restaurant that only serves vegan things.
It was good.
It was food.
If anyone judged me, I survived it.
Today was better.
xx Monique
** inspired by:
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-572-5-minute-freewrite-wednesday-prompt-room-service
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Tonight you will order room service @mo-nique. 🤞
https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-573-5-minute-freewrite-thursday-prompt-inbox
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Actually, tonight, my dad is cooking me dinner :)
Thanks for the link!
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Your balance is below $0.3. Your account is running low and should be replenished. You have roughly 10 more @dustsweeper votes. Check out the Dustsweeper FAQ here: https://steemit.com/dustsweeper/@dustsweeper/dustsweeper-faq
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Honestly, I don’t know what you are talking about..
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Your friend from home was absolutely correct. Most people are too busy with their own stuff to give you a second thought, let alone judge you.
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Of course he was!! But anxiety is anxiety 🤷🏻♀️
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