i have never in my life been an insider. in high school i was the outcast of the outcast crowd. i've never fit in anywhere, with anyone. i used to think it was just me. then i figured out, that it is just me. not trying to be emo with the "nobody understands me", but i have learned strength and peace in solitude. a self reliance, that if i had ever fit in i would never have realized. maybe there are benefits to being an insider, but i wouldn't know. i'll celebrate what i have. thanks for the post.